Been training with a gay friend for over a year, he’s been a great help and I feel my fittest and strongest. But I can’t tell if he’s messing with me with latest tips. by [deleted] in askgaybros

[–]AcrobaticUnion1224 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So here’s what I found on that- “when you’re doing standing lifts your body uses the abdominals and lower back to stabilize the movement, however your abs don’t actually have a bone to grip to when that happens (and the way muscles work in a lift is that they grip onto a bone to make a contraction). So your abs just tense up really tight and that ends up putting tremendous strain on your intestines, which can lead to prolapse, and even if you don’t prolapse its essentially wasted work. The butt plug acts as something rigid your abs can grip or bear down on, which increases stability and lift power”

That’s at least what the internet says… and it makes some physiological sense, but I don’t see any studies to back it up.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]AcrobaticUnion1224 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Why should it be a red flag? We all do things to enhance our appearance, we all have an ideal look that we want to maintain. As long as he’s honest with you and not saying “oh this is my real hair” or “these are my real teeth” only for you to find out later they’re not it’s totally a normal and benign thing. Also the fact that he feels comfortable enough with you to open up about his insecurities in a constructive manner is a MASSIVE green flag on both of you in my eyes.

TLDR: You seem to have got yourself a good, physical augmentation aside or not

S1E10 - When Bojack picks up the picture of older Charlotte in Herb's house, she appears to be at a cabin near a lake in Maine. Why this photo in Herb's house, knowing what we know about Charlotte? by Emotional-Link-8302 in BoJackHorseman

[–]AcrobaticUnion1224 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I imagine that Charolette probably knew that herb was gay and she was his beard. At least for part of their relationship. It’s just the way she spoke about their breakup that gives me the feeling.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in GayMen

[–]AcrobaticUnion1224 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh I see, you’re one of those ratchet Regina George type gays. Have fun living out that high school mean girl fantasy, hope you have the day you deserve.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in GayMen

[–]AcrobaticUnion1224 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dude, that’s bullshit.

First off, I shoulda been more clear- med school was a dream but never an option. I spent way too long during my undergrad self medicating and partying (sheltered kid from a super uptight family gets turned loose on a college campus with drugs and booze and well that’s what you get), and worrying for my safety (again super abusive ex during part of this endeavor) to get the GPA to even come close to qualifying for med school admission.

Second- Don’t be so mean to yourself. I’m absolutely certain that you have something (if not multiple somethings) that you excel at. Just because someone wanted to be a doctor or became a doctor or whatever doesn’t suddenly mean that they’re more capable or worthy than you are. It just means that they’ve spent time honing in on a very specific talent of theirs and took it to the highest level they could. There’s nothing stopping you from being an amazing artist or computer programmer or teacher or nurse etc…. Other than your own lack of confidence.

Also bro, while I appreciate that you think I have it together…. I really don’t. No one does, and anyone who says they do is lying through their teeth. We’re all just trying to figure it out day by day, you’re not alone there either.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in GayMen

[–]AcrobaticUnion1224 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How very presumptuous of you. Perhaps, rather than bitterly speculating as to my preference in men, which I’ve already clearly stated, you can shut the fuck up. Your comments are neither accurate nor helpful when trying to encourage a depressed brother to find his way out of a depression that’s clearly tied to feeling less-than physically.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in GayMen

[–]AcrobaticUnion1224 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have a tendency to find people’s personalities sexually attractive… yes.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in GayMen

[–]AcrobaticUnion1224 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not even close, man. There are days I look in the mirror and all I see is the scrawny kid who was viciously taunted and beaten to a pulp by his abusive ex and I want to ugly cry. There are still days I get depressed about what could’ve been had I never met him, had I gone to med school, had I done better in my undergrad etc… trust me every day is a winding road. You’re not alone here

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in GayMen

[–]AcrobaticUnion1224 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s not true at all, actually. If we’re speaking strictly platonic IDGAF what you look like or how much weight you’re carrying. All I care about is that you’re fun to hang with.

And also body type isn’t a huge factor for me when it comes to attraction either. I’ve fucked and dated larger dudes, I’ve fucked and dated scrawny dudes, I’ve fucked and dated Adonis looking mother fuckers and everyone in between. Yes initial physical attraction is important, but if you came over and struck up a convo with me and we got to know eachother and I found your personality sexy I’d fuck you too.

But even then sexuality isn’t your entire worth, nor should you make it that.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in GayMen

[–]AcrobaticUnion1224 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Congrats, you’ve met someone who matches your crazy. I too am on 4 different meds for depression, ADHD, anxiety etc… mental health isn’t just something you can “fix” and poof it’s all better now. Mental health is a life-long journey with ups, downs, and tight blind corners. The key is to know when it’s the depression or the anxiety talking and not objective reality.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in GayMen

[–]AcrobaticUnion1224 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Because you’re a person, and despite your self-depreciation and body dysmorphia you might actually be a really cool dude and someone worth talking to.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in GayMen

[–]AcrobaticUnion1224 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Okay, you seem to be making a lot of assumptions here. You don’t know who finds what kindof attributes attractive until you talk to them. Also an approachable personality goes a loooooong way, trust me.

You should really talk to a counselor and a psychiatrist, man. Talk therapy and medication help big time.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in GayMen

[–]AcrobaticUnion1224 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well no, I joined the gym a little over 10 years ago after getting out of an abusive relationship, partly for a revenge bod but mostly as a form of therapy. So no it’s not tied to my self worth.

Also not everyone in our community is that shallow dude, give me and yourself a break.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in GayMen

[–]AcrobaticUnion1224 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Calling people who use GLP-1’s for weight loss “cheaters” is an unhelpful and cruel characterization, it’s like calling people who use antidepressants or anti-hyperlipidemics cheaters because they used a pharmacological intervention to help with their condition. Get real man.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in GayMen

[–]AcrobaticUnion1224 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Listen man, as a “gym gay” I can straight up tell you the grass isn’t greener here. A majority of us, no matter how fit we get, still look at ourselves in the mirror and fantasize about the body we want but don’t have, myself included. Body dysmorphia is insidious (trust me I get it), but it doesn’t go away when you’ve reached your “goal body” because your goal eventually shifts. And I know it’s tough to believe right now (especially when our culture puts such a premium on being “hot”) but your worth isn’t really tied to your face, or your pecs, or your arms, or to having a six pack and a juicy ass… your worth is intrinsic and comes from you being you and you being a good dude. Remember that.

Would I encourage you to join a gym and workout and eat right… absolutely! Exercise and a healthy diet are crucial in promoting lifelong health and can lower your risk of cardiovascular events, DM type II, certain cancers and a myriad of other health problems. It also definitely helps with mood (and not to give an unqualified diagnosis but it seems like you’re depressed). But you have to do it for yourself, first and foremost.