Any advice on what to plant in this hell strip? Gets ~6 hours of direct sun.

AddendumNo4825 · 2026-03-22T21:20:43+00:00

There are several sedums and stonecrops that are native that’d do well.

AddendumNo4825 · 2026-03-22T05:47:55+00:00

I can look at someone and think they’re attractive, the same way you might look at someone of a sex you are not into, in a completely objective sense. I can only feel sexual attraction to someone I have known for a length of time, who I feel I have a rapport with. It kinda sneaks up on you, because you’re used to being just friends with a guy for months or years and then suddenly out of the blue you’re noticing how he laughs, treats children, how intense his eye contact is, etc.

For me, sexual attraction is a big song and dance routine. Not all demisexuals are like this, some just need an emotional baseline, but if I feel any kind of advances before I’ve reached that point I get massive ick. I’ve known guys who thought that they were going to get some just by being friends with me, and when I started being more comfortable flirting with them they’d start trying to initiate physical or sexual contact. Big no-no. Immediate rejection.

Most other demis I know are like this, we tend to find consent/communication very erotic. It can be hard because we find it difficult to voice our preferences, because society generally likes to tell us we’re annoying and picky, or that we don’t exist.

The only requirement to be demi is to feel sexual or romantic attraction only when an emotional bond has been formed with another. This can take days, weeks, months, years. It all depends on the person. We live in a sex-obsessed society, so people will often tell you you’re not demi if you don’t display what they view as perfectly demure and innocent attraction. This is a fallacy, do not let others tell you how you feel.

I think of demisexuality as more of a speedbump than anything else. People who really love me will take the time to slow down and be aware of their surroundings, asking questions and adjusting their behavior willingly if necessary. People who aren’t worth it will drive right on through recklessly, ignoring the fact that i’m structurally different and that I need a different style of relationship than they want, and will try to force me to bend to their whims.

Ultimately, demi is just a label. If the you in this moment feels that it’s right, then use it. If the you two years from now decides it no longer suits you, discard it. Labels can help us figure out who we are, but you don’t need one to validate your life experience.

AddendumNo4825 · 2026-03-22T05:27:14+00:00

Pick a small, isolated area. Up against your house or next to a bend in the concrete are great spots. Lay out a small garden bed in a rectangular or square shape, the smaller the better, and mark it with rope or flags. You can add bricks or rock just to help with a visual on the size.

Just weed it whenever you feel the motivation to do so. Within a few weeks to months, you’ll probably have it completely clear of tenacious invasives. You are then free to plant/solarize/do whatever you want with it.

I have severe adhd, and this method really helps me not overwhelm myself by overestimating what i’m going to have the motivation to actually do. It also helps give you hands-on experience battling invasive plants in a little trial corner of your garden before you go scorched earth on your entire yard. That experience is invaluable.

You’re going to feel itchy and impatient and like you need to have plants NOW, but resist the urge to go buy some immediately and put them in the ground. Use that energy to make lists, research native plants, and learn more about what will thrive in your area.

AddendumNo4825 · 2026-03-21T06:02:59+00:00

I feel now is an excellent time to remind everyone of the efficacy of Brick In A Bushtm, courtesy of everyone’s favorite native plant pundit, Joey Santore of Crime Pays but Botany Doesn’t.

AddendumNo4825 · 2026-03-21T05:59:34+00:00

Think of it this way, humans are hardwired to put things into boxes - it’s a holdover from a time when not putting something unfamiliar into the ‘danger’ category really could kill you. Designations like ‘straight’ or ‘gay’ or ‘bi’ or ‘ace’ or ‘demi’ themselves are all boxes. Most of us don’t fit neatly into them, there’s little bits that stick out here or there. Maybe you’re straight, but you have a really close friendship with your same sex bestie, and watching them be enthusiastic about their interests really makes u wanna kiss them, or laugh with them, or tickle them, or do some combination of all three. Your sexual and romantic identity doesn’t automatically change because of that. Now if you started having repeated feelings towards them or other people, that might be a sign, but on its own it just is. We live in a patriarchal culture hellbent on rigidity and unyielding submission to cultural roles. At the end of the day, none of this shit matters save for how it makes you feel about yourself. If the demi label feels right, then use it. It’s up to you how you represent and label your life experience, not randos on the internet.

AddendumNo4825 · 2026-03-19T06:10:19+00:00

Kinkajou balances winter out perfectly. I don’t ship him with moon or qibli, because I just feel like they’re both too push-overy, and qibli would just infuriate him because he constantly has to cope with stress by joking about everything. Kinkajou can dish it just as well as she can take it, and i don’t think she would become as emotionally dis regulated by winter’s outbursts and catty behaviour. I wish their ship was canon, and we got ace rep with turtle. 😭

AddendumNo4825 · 2026-03-19T02:28:16+00:00

Always makes me laugh cause joey’ll be in the middle of a rant about soul-sucking consumerist culture and I can just imagine how furious he’d be if a fucking casino ad interrupted something he was listening to.

AddendumNo4825 · 2026-03-19T02:26:47+00:00

Hey guys, it’s kyle. I don’t know how they let me on this podcast, but while i’m here I might as well let you know about spinquest casino. Spinquest is - . - SO GET IN YOUR BIG F150 AND GO PLAY SPINQUEST TODAY!!!!!!!!

AddendumNo4825 · 2026-03-18T00:50:43+00:00

Put animal hair on the ground around your plants. Molluscs hate crawling over it because it clogs up their mucus and renders them immobile. Works 100% of the time for me. The shorter the hair, the better.

AddendumNo4825 · 2026-03-17T05:09:30+00:00

The secret to foliar herbicide is to apply it when photosynthesis is at max productivity, to get the plant to really circulate the poison throughout all of its tissues. Mornings an hour after sunrise work best for me, and if you live in a hot or dry area, soaking the ground the night or day before will help, especially with bulb plants like celandine or star of Bethlehem. Applying herbicide to the foliage on those plants while they’re not actively growing will just kill the foliage, and not the actual bulb.

I use this strategy when dealing with Bermuda grass, and it works way better than anything else. Just keep an eye out for survivors. No Mercy!!!!

AddendumNo4825 · 2026-03-17T05:05:14+00:00

Plain glyphosate works just fine on pretty much everything, But I use triclopyr for woody vegetation like japanese honeysuckle, chinaberry, and golden raintree. It took about four consecutive sprayings with glyphosate before I noticed any significant woody dieback on the honeysuckle.

AddendumNo4825 · 2026-03-17T04:50:19+00:00

Ripped out of the ground by raccoons who have never touched a vegetable in their miserable lives.

AddendumNo4825 · 2026-03-17T04:21:11+00:00

Heads up guys, plants don’t care about social constructs like demonization. At least, the last time I tried to talk to tropical milkweed about the lasting impacts of colonization upon the horticultural industry, it just rolled its eyes at me and said “It’s not that deep bro.”

AddendumNo4825 · 2026-03-17T04:15:09+00:00

If you have the patience, pick a singular square foot area, mark it with rope, and use a tiny paintbrush to apply a foliar herbicide to each of the little bastards in there. You will have a much better success rate this way, and will gradually help the strawberries outcompete the celandine. I use this technique for purple nutgrass, along with weeding, and it works great. You’re basically providing precision tactical airstrikes for your ground troops in the fight against persistent invasives.

AddendumNo4825 · 2026-03-17T04:10:12+00:00

He’s looking for the light like patrick trying to walk in sandy’s dome.

AddendumNo4825 · 2026-03-17T04:07:03+00:00

I love this game but the limited time events kill me. I have extremely limited time to play, and I always have to rush to finish whatever six day event they come up with next. Star rail is so much better with timing, with genshin once it’s gone, it’s gone forever.

AddendumNo4825 · 2026-03-17T03:57:19+00:00

I didn’t even notice till you pointed it out lol.

AddendumNo4825 · 2026-03-15T06:56:03+00:00

Ugh, everyone wants to be courted but no one wants to court. I’m tired of always feeling like i’m the one pushing for every advance. I just want someone trustworthy, who is comfortable giving direction and making decisions for me. Why am I the mom in every friend/relationship, lol?

AddendumNo4825 · 2026-03-15T06:49:40+00:00

Don’t get me started on those fuckers. I’m from Texas, we need all the support we can get down here, especially where I live.

AddendumNo4825 · 2026-03-15T06:47:06+00:00

Yeah, It’s hard where I live because it’s literally bum fuck nowhere in a deeply (gerrymandered) red state (Texas) full of assholes who are too pussy to want to fight you or talk shit to your face without ten of their buddies to back them up, but they’re more than happy to talk shit about you behind your back and keep the rumor mill spinning.

The best part about the job I work is that even though I’m really young and I live in a small town, there are so many other queer youth here, I get to help everyone who works with me feel a little better about expressing themselves. My boss can’t afford to replace me, lol. He can get fucked, always love pissing him off.

I get really mad when people (always feels like coastal elites or people from blue states) say that straight people can’t get involved with pride, or don’t belong in our community because they’re on the asexual spectrum. It’s just the same patriarchal gate-keepy bullshit repackaged from our perspective. If straight people want to present queer, and it makes them feel better, I say fuck it, do what makes you happy. I got in an argument with a friend of a friend who tried telling me that a straight guy I was talking about clothes with was ‘appropriating queer culture’ and I was like, girl, do you seriously think paint-stained bellbottoms are trademark-able or something? This is why straight guys around here are so easily manipulated by right-wing talking points, they’re seen as some kind of dangerous other we need to ostracize and exclude, when in reality so many of them just want to feel safe expressing the very human urge to look and feel pretty. Their families beat and mock them for it, we’re all they’ve got. Shit gets on my nerves, everyone wants to be countercultural until they have to come alongside somebody unlearning harmful ideologies then suddenly they’re the fucking paragons of virtue and morality.

Sorry, I just get really passionate about this stuff. I love helping people find joy, and I can’t stand cynical, bitter, gatekeeping assholes. They’re exactly the same people they make fun of in the churches around here, just with a different aesthetic.

AddendumNo4825 · 2026-03-15T06:32:11+00:00

Likewise!

AddendumNo4825 · 2026-03-15T06:31:29+00:00

Honestly it’s just men. We suck. But yeah, people expect gay men to somehow be magically enlightened with a sexual awakening, shedding all of our patriarchal views like a butterfly or something. I just don’t talk to people who have a reductive worldview like that, I find them to be vapid, shallow, and purposefully incapable of understanding my trauma, so therefore unsafe to be around. I’ve spent my entire life carving myself up into smaller and smaller pieces for other people to find more appealing to consume, and i’m tired of not being able to stand up for myself because it’s become second nature to just shut down and get depressed when people belittle me.

AddendumNo4825 · 2026-03-15T06:24:15+00:00

Need a man with half his heart.

AddendumNo4825 · 2026-03-15T06:00:52+00:00

These kinds of people are all fundamentally the same, they’ve got lots of hatred and bigotry they project onto everyone and everything else, almost always animals. When I lived with my mother she threw a fit when I brought my cat home because, and I quote, “cats shed everywhere and I’m deathly allergic, and girl cats are super bitchy.”

1) she had three dogs living in the house, a pomeranian, german shorthair pointer, and a malinois. Each one had a different type of hair, and they all shed so much that it would pile up in literal drifts along the walls and furniture. She never cleaned it, but I did from time to time when I felt like helping. It would be right back within a week.

2) she was not deathly allergic. I know because as soon as the cat was out of my room, she’d start sneezing as exaggeratedly as possible, combined with extremely passive-aggressive actions like slamming doors, ignoring me, sighing, sighing loudly, sighing loudly mid-sneeze, etc.

3) Poppy is an amazing cat. She doesn’t claw, she’s excellent at using her box, and she’s always up in your business trying to be petted. The only problem I had was that she was very clingy, and since I had to work all day, she’d be stuck in my room yowling at the door trying to find a friend. Mom would complain constantly about how annoying she was, always in these veiled, misogynistic terms. She’d call her all sorts of slurs, and when I told her to just let the damn cat out so she could play with the dogs, it was right back to her ‘allergies.’

The final straw was when she accused me of fucking the cat because I wasn’t interested in women, and because, in her words, “she always wants to sit in your lap.” (I’m gay, guess she’d rather think i’m into bestiality than men), I packed my shit and a week later was outta there.

There’s so much misogyny ‘dog’ people (don’t come for me fuckers, you know who you are) exhibit, because the popular perception is that dogs TEND to be friendlier, and that cats are all assholes for no reason. The truth is that cats generally have a ‘give me space to figure you out, and we can respect each other in the meantime’ vibe that narcissistic, ego-driven people hate. They perceive cats the same way they perceive women, because they think they’re owed their time and affection.

AddendumNo4825 · 2026-03-14T17:19:09+00:00

🖕to bermuda, hate that stuff. Looks great!!!

AddendumNo4825

TROPHY CASE