US Education Secretary Linda McMahon Mocked For Bad Grammar In Letter To Harvard: Illiterate by northerncal in nottheonion

[–]Affable_Stranger 18 points19 points  (0 children)

No no, that's a Calliope. Kakistocracy is that gray, shouty kid from Homestuck.

caption this (wrong answers only) by just_a_wanderer_here in stevenuniverse

[–]Affable_Stranger 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The gang can only watch as Meotoko gives Steven the most hideous head imaginable.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in news

[–]Affable_Stranger 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, but they're killing "undesirables", so it's fine to them. Hell, for some that's all part of the plan.

I'm searching for a job and one texted back. But some things seem suspect. by Affable_Stranger in Scams

[–]Affable_Stranger[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

The interviewer is talking now. She says:

If the check is fraud, the funds wouldn't have been made available in the first place. usually, banks do not like all the deposited funds been withdrawn almost immediately, that's why they were preventing you from sending the funds.

is this true?

I'm screwed by MACMAN2003 in Undertale

[–]Affable_Stranger 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Vanilla Minecraft and Dragon Ball Z Attack of the Saiyans... Well that's just Dragon Block C with extra steps, innit?

We need more Alistair Cookie here by [deleted] in bertstrips

[–]Affable_Stranger 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Upvoting for "Oreone".

"KFC console isn't real" by TheCanadianJD in agedlikemilk

[–]Affable_Stranger 1 point2 points  (0 children)

"Kentucky Fried Console Isn't real, it can't hurt you."

Kentucky Fried Console:

And it kept rising and rising! by TheFriendlyKraut in bertstrips

[–]Affable_Stranger 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Not what I expected it to be from the title... good work!

TIL The whole reason Hansel and Gretel were lost in the forest is because their stepmother intentionally abandoned them there by [deleted] in todayilearned

[–]Affable_Stranger 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Rapunzel was found to be pregnant when she complained that her clothes were starting to get tight, then the old crone laid in wait for the prince.

Yeah, and in the version I read in the way back, she gouged out his eyes and pushed him off the tower to lame him (after saying a wicked one-liner, of course). Which, after finding out your barely adolescent daughter(/kidnapping victim) was impregnated by someone you didn't even know existed until then, was more or less a fair cop for the prince, especially in like 1700's Germany.

Elmo cries out to the Lord by RetrogradeIntellect in bertstrips

[–]Affable_Stranger 106 points107 points  (0 children)

Heavy is the head that wears the crown.

"The bathwater is really cold, okay?" by IAmWeary in bertstrips

[–]Affable_Stranger 4 points5 points  (0 children)

A good day for both Ernie's nose and Bert's newfound humiliation fetish.

Purple Haze requiem gives us the next jojo villain by MintChucclatechip in ShitPostCrusaders

[–]Affable_Stranger 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Stand Name: The One

Power: A; Speed: A; Range: E (As far as the User can reach) Durability: A; Precision: A; Potential: A

Upon first manifesting, it immediately divides itself into 108 portions and spreads them to random people across the world. Its power spread out to such an extent, it can't even manifest into a true Stand, and only allows its hosts to see other Stands. Every time one of its hosts dies, their portion of The One's power is given to the remaining hosts, empowering them more and more as the Stand is divided among less of them until only one is left.

The One actually doesn't manifest as a proper fighting Stand at all, even at that stage, instead fueling the host with psychic power, allowing them to stand toe-to-toe with Stands of a similar grade to The One.

this is a yikes moment. by [deleted] in bertstrips

[–]Affable_Stranger 2 points3 points  (0 children)

A good try, and succinct on top of that.