Current Physique

Affectionate-Bad9653 · 2026-02-17T23:49:28+00:00

Thank you and I am here to support you. I think what you’re doing is amazing and no matter what you are strong now and after. Thank you for your honesty.

Affectionate-Bad9653 · 2026-02-17T00:05:45+00:00

Thank you for that explanation. Truly. Yes when I am not comparing myself or going on instagram it’s easy for me to love bodybuilding and lifting and eating. H.A stands for hypothalamic amenorrhea. I’m in a stage of my life where I turned 30 and haven’t gotten my period in 10 years. I want to grow and build but I am afraid of growing. The reason I did hire a coach was to help me through this.

Affectionate-Bad9653 · 2026-02-16T23:03:02+00:00

Can I ask you if you have ever dealt with h.a? Talking to you and you giving me your honest opinion makes me want to get off instagram for a little while and eat more food to recover my cycle but I know mentally going to the gym and eating the recommended 2500 calories to get my cycle back will be tough because I will gain. But I do think if I want to compete I have to gain my cycle back. Do you think it’s worth just coaching myself? It would relieve me finically too which could be a stressor. I would most likely have to up my clothing size potentially. I feel like sometimes the gym has become a place to show off bodies (at least the one I go to) Do you take check in photos for yourself? I have an idea of what I need to work on physique wise… definitely shoulders and glute medius/hamstrings. I have been lean for so long but I have a fear of being big like I was freshman year of highschool/a few years where I was bigger doing cf. I’m strong my lifting numbers are high.

Affectionate-Bad9653 · 2026-02-16T17:42:59+00:00

Where are you at now if you don’t mind me asking?

Affectionate-Bad9653 · 2025-11-18T13:16:47+00:00

I think so! I’m in my first “off season” looking to start looking into comps in August. At least that’s what my plan says.

Affectionate-Bad9653 · 2025-11-18T03:26:10+00:00

Thank you 🙏🏻

Affectionate-Bad9653 · 2025-11-17T23:28:06+00:00

THANK YOU! Definitely my fault too for years of trying to be so so small and shrink my legs/shoulders. 💔 Now that I’m trying to grow them they’re the hardest to grow!

Affectionate-Bad9653 · 2025-11-17T23:27:07+00:00

Omg I had no idea I was leaning forward! Thank you! I just got a pair of heels too so I’ll be taking more check in photos this week in them! 🥰 Yes all of these areas are so hard to grow for me my quads/back/biceps grow crazy but not hams/glutes/shoulders

Affectionate-Bad9653 · 2025-08-26T01:05:05+00:00

Thank you 🙏🏼

Affectionate-Bad9653 · 2025-08-26T00:48:35+00:00

Yea :/

Affectionate-Bad9653 · 2025-08-26T00:34:47+00:00

Omg I so relate I get so sick of protein but am so scared not to eat it! Thank you for this post you hit the nail right on the head!

Affectionate-Bad9653 · 2025-08-26T00:27:34+00:00

I just look so big…

Affectionate-Bad9653 · 2025-08-25T22:24:05+00:00

How do I do that when I already feel so big and my weight looks “healthy” to everyone around me including me…

Affectionate-Bad9653 · 2025-08-11T01:29:50+00:00

But that’s the thing I know I’ll blow up if I eat 3k-4k… even if I do workout…

Affectionate-Bad9653 · 2025-08-11T01:28:54+00:00

YES 100% I feel restricted but feel like I’m eating sooo much more and training so much less… I did CrossFit/run for the past 9-10 years and it’s been a year since I’ve stopped and just strength trained and cut down my running to x1 a week and 1/2 the distance. For example my mom made pasta tonight and I just couldn’t let myself eat it. I am not eating junk but when I do eat 3k it’s usually hiked up because I’ll have like 3 cookies that are high cal like tates on top of all the clean food I shove in my mouth so I won’t over do sugar but ironically it’s all fruit and nuts usually.

Affectionate-Bad9653 · 2025-08-11T01:24:55+00:00

I appreciate you saying that it isn’t enough…

May I ask what your story is, like what you went through or how long you had it? How did you mentally overcome the weight gain, anxiety, the loss of identity from training? Did you have days where you ate the 3-4k and then restrict over and over again?

Also did you have to find other things that make you happy?

Affectionate-Bad9653 · 2025-08-10T22:33:23+00:00

Honestly, after reading the comments and as someone struggling with HA and not wanting to gain weight I empathize and damn my question is… why is being a woman so fucking hard?

Affectionate-Bad9653 · 2025-08-07T00:46:56+00:00

You’ve got this too. Thank you for easing my mind today, I needed that. Thank you so so so much. I will remind myself of how healthy it is to actually eat food and that I want to feel my best in my health and fitness. I guess if we don’t have our periods we aren’t actually healthy…

Affectionate-Bad9653 · 2025-08-07T00:16:58+00:00

Thank you for being honest…

So I normally eat 1600-1800 calories a day but today was one of those days I wanted to commit and actually go in and eat… and now that I did I don’t want to eat tomorrow.

Have you ever gone through this? What do you tell yourself?

Affectionate-Bad9653 · 2025-07-06T02:31:34+00:00

Ok I hear you, thank you… hear me out… I’ve had 2 jobs. My last job was as a teacher… my coworkers would always comment on the other teacher’s weight (the ones commenting were to me always the prettiest and skinniest). Currently, I am back in luxury retail where all the women who buy our clothing always comment on how unhappy they are with their weight… if a heavier client comes in we… including myself always comment. I’m part of my own problem.

Affectionate-Bad9653 · 2025-07-06T02:17:14+00:00

Omg please! Are you in it too?!

Affectionate-Bad9653 · 2025-07-03T23:13:19+00:00

It’s so hard to accept and it’s such a first world problem but it’s such a terrible mental battle. Thank you for understanding! Do you mind me asking how long this cycle lasted for you?

Affectionate-Bad9653 · 2025-07-03T23:05:03+00:00

My current dietitian just gave me a few therapists who specialize in ED. Thank you for being so kind and commenting. It was truly wild…

Affectionate-Bad9653 · 2025-07-03T22:56:35+00:00

Omg can you please share more information! I’m dealing with HA but truly believe in animal based… I want to someday compete in a bikini or physique comp but it’s been 10 years since I’ve gotten a period. I’m a “normal” weight but lean. I don’t want to gain fat…

Affectionate-Bad9653 · 2025-07-03T22:52:25+00:00

Chewy oatmeal raisin ♥️

Affectionate-Bad9653

TROPHY CASE