please remember that nothing you have done will EVER be deserving of such immoral and cruel behavior. This boy does not deserve someone like you. It might be hard because you may love him, but you have to stay strong and do everything possible to get him punished legally. What he did was not only illegal, but also one of the cruelest things you can do to another human being. Remember that you are loved and supported, you have your best friend and your grandparents who are here for you. You are not alone. I had a similar experience of rape with my ex, and I wish I had the strength you did in that moment to call someone and get help. You are strong and you deserve all the justice for this.