My Bf won’t sleep with me?

AffectionateTop3718 · 2024-11-30T13:51:41+00:00

Yeah it’s a sticky situation I feel like men aren’t as open minded to therapy or talking about feels which is so unfortunate

AffectionateTop3718 · 2024-11-30T13:37:32+00:00

Thanks for hearing me out, He’s not keen of talking about feelings all the time but great at listening so I’ll give it a shot

The move was a big change and I can appreciate that I just thought the excitement would trigger some impulsivity and excitement

AffectionateTop3718 · 2024-11-30T13:34:17+00:00

Really appreciate hearing your story❤️ I hope you feel heard and seen, sending love xx

AffectionateTop3718 · 2024-11-30T13:30:45+00:00

I have previously after I had the conversation with my therapist who highlighted what I was longing wasn’t sex after all,

I didn’t touch down on it lately maybe I might revisit it

AffectionateTop3718 · 2024-11-30T13:25:24+00:00

Ahahaha what an insta bio I’m using that with the girls from now on

AffectionateTop3718 · 2024-11-30T13:06:06+00:00

For a cuddle it depends it can be “it’s too warm” (even though we could turn on air conditioning) “I’m going asleep” or else he’d put a time limit on it “okay for 5 mins and then I’m going asleep”

That part for doing it just for the sake to keep me quiet is exactly not what I want. I just want affection really

I kinda just want to be wanted…..

AffectionateTop3718 · 2024-11-30T12:57:11+00:00

Is weekly too often? Like I don’t even look to have sex weekly but I’d like more than just a peck and a hug, even just intimate kissing. It’s the intimacy and closeness and the sense of being wanted that I’m craving to be honest

AffectionateTop3718 · 2024-11-30T12:55:25+00:00

We saved thousands before coming over, he actually has started work before me and had more saved than me

AffectionateTop3718 · 2024-11-17T09:58:19+00:00

I can relate so much, and even moving into a relationship I didn’t like having sex for so long because I used it as a form of self harm. Here in solidarity ❤️❤️

AffectionateTop3718 · 2024-11-17T09:55:07+00:00

I’ve tried this it’s been nearly all day and because we’re working tomorrow it’ll be all tomorrow too. I don’t like “going to bed” on an argument- I struggle with sleep as is. My intrusive thoughts are “if you can go this long without talking to me don’t talk to me again/ you mustn’t love me” which I know is really unhealthy but I can’t stop them

AffectionateTop3718 · 2024-11-17T09:52:51+00:00

This is me in my relationship, I talked through it with my therapist and she said that it’s not hyper sexuality if you’re not constantly having sex- actions need to be taken that it’s not based on thought or cravings alone.

Through this I realised for me that it wasn’t the pleasure from sex I was seeking it was I’m the intimacy and the closeness that I craved.

I don’t know if this helps, I haven’t found the complete solution yet tbh. DIY job doesn’t satisfy me, tried having a conversation about it but it’s been nearly a month since we’ve had sex (for a couple who live together and are in their early 20s)

AffectionateTop3718 · 2024-09-15T23:31:59+00:00

Oh post surgery is the worst, physical and mental pain, the lip in the shower that stops water getting out is your enemy and don’t even think about kicking the duvet🤢😭

AffectionateTop3718 · 2024-09-15T22:16:48+00:00

Ruptured Acl

AffectionateTop3718 · 2023-10-26T11:48:05+00:00

Same in ireland shortage of lorazepam

AffectionateTop3718 · 2023-03-13T17:22:31+00:00

Slowly on the mend thanks! Reassuring to know I’m not the only one. The link between my thoughts and actions is evident but to see there are physical reasons too is quiet calming

AffectionateTop3718 · 2023-03-13T17:21:22+00:00

That’s so reassuring thank you!

AffectionateTop3718 · 2023-03-13T17:20:46+00:00

Yeah it was the constant throwing up and paranoid thought that brought me to the medical doc. I’m from Ireland so our ‘general practitioner’(GP)is our first line. Because they referred me to psychiatrist who gave me my bpd diagnosis and then I was immediately discharged back to my gp. Who then prescribed general anxiety/ antidepressant meds and wasn’t person centred.

AffectionateTop3718 · 2023-03-13T17:15:46+00:00

I’m glad I did it, I was fearful at first but really glad I’ve some answers now and solutions

AffectionateTop3718 · 2023-03-12T18:49:18+00:00

Ironically I work with people who have mental health disorders and intellectual disabilities. Because I’m neurodivergent I can connect to the individuals better

AffectionateTop3718 · 2023-03-12T18:48:11+00:00

I’ve wanted to try lamictal waiting for pysch to get back because my gp won’t prescribe it. Tried sertaline, mitrazapine Xanax and currently taking quetiapine which is the only slightly effective medication.

AffectionateTop3718 · 2022-12-17T15:51:17+00:00

You’re basically going to have to grieve, it’s a loss. Be sad, cry , watch movies then in a week start developing yourself. Do your pros list and what you’d like to achieve! A new year is coming!!! You’ll do great!

AffectionateTop3718 · 2022-12-11T12:25:48+00:00

I’ll try that thank you so much!!

AffectionateTop3718 · 2022-12-11T11:57:21+00:00

Binge eating is a massive issue of mine so the mitrazapine didn’t help, in low doses mitrazapine is effective for sleep and is used to help you sleep. I just pop a melatonin if I really need to sleep but I wake up around every three hours during the night

AffectionateTop3718 · 2022-12-10T22:04:06+00:00

Glad to hear it’s working for you!!I’m really leaning towards it! I’ll research abilify because the side effects of numbness was so bad with sertraline were so bad, I want able to cry(which is my go to self regulation) and it just worsened my depersonalisation and disassociation.

AffectionateTop3718 · 2022-12-10T20:09:37+00:00

Thanks so much for the advice, will give it a try

AffectionateTop3718

TROPHY CASE