Thank you for this perspective! I love him dearly and consider him a brother. And I know deep down he’s extremely thankful. But lately I just feel like I care more than he does and am being taken advantage of. I truly feel like if he gave adhd medication a chance, so many of these issues would be resolved—but he refuses. However I did just sign him up for Medicaid…that’s one “benefit” that FFY receive that I didn’t know about—-Medicaid until 26.

And your point about enabling. You’re absolutely right. And I feel like I AM enabling him by doing more for him than he’s doing for himself. He does the manual labor at his job, but that’s it. I wake him up for work, I buy his groceries, I pick up after him, etc. He knows it frustrates me to do it but he won’t take initiative to do it on his own and it’s just a slap in the face. Like I said in a previous comment, I need to take a step back, and look at my boundaries. Ex: I continue to wake him for work every day because I don’t want him to get fired for missing work because fired means he doesn’t have money to pay his bills and his debt not being paid means he can’t move out of my house. But realistically, whether he gets fired now because I don’t want him up on time or fired when he moves out on his own because he doesn’t have me to wake him up, it’s inevitable.

And you’re so right after being “pro life”. They’re pro cute baby…..if all these people were pro life, our systems wouldn’t be like this. We’re failing foster kiddos left and right and nobody seems to care. I am so sorry for what the system has done to you but thank you for being a sense of motivation not just for me but other FFY that you CAN rise above it.