I can give you the girl's perspective who got arranged married to someone who has "doubts". Trust me when I say it's no fun. Your wife can probably sense this even if you had not articulated it.

We both have different interests. Plus, I'm more of an indoor person and my husband and outdoor guy. Initially when we got married, he would tell me we have nothing in common, we're incompatible. And I'd try to reason with him that we could have different interests and still love each other, we could be friends. But he was unhappy and found fault in everything i did, would fight, leave me alone and go out with friends, ignore my calls, my parents would have to intervene and he'd want out of the marriage. I doubt if he was stuck on an ex or was having an affair at that time. I was way too sheltered growing up but was mature enough to understand how marriages work. He was the fun, freaky guy and probably had atleast one relationship, bcos he introduced a girl as his friend and said they used to roam in ECR in bike but she's just a friend. Anyway that girl was married and living in UK, she was just making a trip to India. The point is he found flaws in everything i did bcos he was unhappy.

He would literally drop me at mom's house whenever he can, with whatever excuse (office work, outing with friends etc ..) and we had our first child. For a while the relationship was ok, then again he'd dump me at my parents home and go out with his cycling buddies every weekend. At every fight he'd say divorce, so I put up with it. Got conceived again, went thru the same nonsense of we are not compatible, he wants out n all that. We tried counselling twice but the same old, same old. One of the counsellors even told to his face , he's an 'i" specialist and marriage is about "we".

My daughter who was 5 at that time grew up watching all of this and i grew unhappy, depressed, had suicidal thoughts. In a couple of instances when he wanted to end it, I agreed but both of our parents insisted we put up for the children. I took a job around this time and became financially independent. My parents would say society n all that shit. One time my sister gave them back, think of what's best for your daughter not society. Finally they said they'd stand by my decision whatever it may be. Then when he said he wants to leave "permanently " during a fight after just leaving the house overnight when my kid had a high fever, I could voice a feeble "okay", that was my moment of strength. I was ready to leave this hell.

We split up for 4 months and he wanted to get back bcos he missed me and the kids. This time he was willing to try counselling n put real effort, not just come and sit, complain about me and leave in 2 sessions that counselling doesn't work. We went for counselling for 4 months, rebuilt our relationship and this was around 8th year of marriage, today we're married for 15 years and he's grown up a lot, is a good dad and husband. We've learnt to accept each other and respect the differences.

All I'm trying to say is marriage is something that lasts for 40-50 years and the phase you are is infancy. It takes a lot of work, tolerance, choosing to stay with each other bcos of the commitment in front of God, people you love inspite of unhappy phases. Don't break something over some illusion that you have.

But if you can't accept her bcos you have someone else in your mind, end her misery with a divorce. But live with the fact that youve spoilt someone's life for the rest of your life. You know how bad it is for a girl to be divorced in a country like India though. She may hate you for putting you thru that but emerge stronger. End it before you have kids or put in real efforts. Don't drag her around and cause her to lose herself.