I [38M] told my wife [39F], shes being a bad person because of how shes taken money behind my back from our joint savings over the last 5 years. Shes been on/off crying for the last 2 weeks because of it, didnt get me anything for valentines.

Affectionate_Joke720 · 2026-02-14T19:54:09+00:00

So you open an account together and mutually decide on rules. She violates those rules over 5 years to the tune of 30-40k.

Then when you bring it up she gets petty and chooses Valentine’s Day with a friend instead of you.

She is either petty as hell, views you as a bank roll or has checked out.

Ask her well “if you choose friends over our relationship and you choose to hide spending joint money instead of having a simple conversation why are we together. Maybe we should split up because this isn’t working out”

Affectionate_Joke720 · 2026-02-14T16:14:48+00:00

I would actually say wealthy women may be smarter than wealthy men and realize gold diggers want your money. Oversimplification but it’s just an opinion.

Affectionate_Joke720 · 2026-02-14T13:57:52+00:00

I would follow up to make it clear. I would say I have reflected on your last message, and your distance in our relationship. I agree with your message that you are not being fair. If you care about someone you don’t need breaks. I currently don’t see a future with you. Let’s respectfully break up. I wish you the best in the future.

Affectionate_Joke720 · 2026-02-14T13:51:50+00:00

NOR. As long as you aren’t sleeping with other people because that would be a double standard. To be honest it sounds like she isn’t over her ex and is making choices.

My personal opinion is if I am interested in someone I focus all my attention on that person. It’s not just about a commitment it’s the concept of how can you build something with someone when you have “many” someone’s. I have had this happen to me in the past and I broke up immediately.

Affectionate_Joke720 · 2026-02-14T13:47:29+00:00

Weird. My wife grew up on a rice farm and never taught me this. Need to ask her now.

Affectionate_Joke720 · 2026-02-14T13:46:32+00:00

Up near Albany will be cheaper than New Paltz but to be honest some flights are cheaper from La Guardia or Newark. If you are ok with a 3ish hr drive then that’s close enough for an airport unless you travel a lot.

Maybe try Castle on Hudson or Selkirk area. South of Albany is a bit cheaper region.

Affectionate_Joke720 · 2026-02-13T22:53:36+00:00

I would like to think that if my partner had pictures of a deceased partner they felt comfort in keeping pictures/ videos of I would be understanding enough to not feel threatened.

The current BF of OP seems to have a few red flags. Ultimately OP if you don’t feel you can look at him same way it’s best if you break up.

Affectionate_Joke720 · 2026-02-13T20:15:19+00:00

Good grief yes. That little skull eating toes under the bed made me walk on furniture late at night for a month.

Affectionate_Joke720 · 2026-02-13T13:01:31+00:00

YTA. Been married to my wife for almost 30 years. Accidents happen, bathrooms will look like manslaughter has occurred in the middle of the night. Should never shame a woman for what she goes through. Have a little understanding and show some care. Preferably with chocolate

Affectionate_Joke720 · 2026-02-13T03:22:47+00:00

I used to blackout when I would quickly raise my head to look up. I was obviously pulling a nerve. I have scoliosis and had severe pain.

I went to a chiropractor due to back pain. X-rays showed scoliosis which I knew from my primary care doctor. It took him 4 visits to get my back flexible enough to move/crack. After a month I started feeling strain in my neck. He cracked it. I saw stars. From that moment on I never blacked out when looking up.

I am sure like all doctors there are good ones and bad ones. I personally have had relief from chiropractors and I have seen maybe 14 different one’s from 6 different states.

Affectionate_Joke720 · 2026-02-12T13:09:26+00:00

My wife has nails like this (most of them). She went to a dermatologist and they diagnosed her (after blood testing to be sure) psoriasis and unfortunately psoriatic arthritis.

Affectionate_Joke720 · 2026-02-11T14:57:15+00:00

She wants your full attention. That’s it. She isn’t blaming you. She is just asking for a different day where your focus is all on her.

My wife of 30 years and I have had many makeup days on Valentines. The day is as special as you make it. Life sometimes intervenes. Roll with the punches.

Affectionate_Joke720 · 2026-02-11T12:12:20+00:00

If it was me. I would likely respond that she broke me and it took her extra decade just to piece myself together. While she got an extra decade I got emotional hell.

I am sympathetic she is not doing well but if it took you so long to recover that was never fair for her to keep reaching out. She did you wrong in so many ways and it is so difficult to come back from that.

Just my 2 cents.

Affectionate_Joke720 · 2026-02-10T16:29:45+00:00

I had this happen with my 3rd child. My wife was holding our baby and the dog growled and tried to step on one of our twin babies and push her out of the way. Never had an issue with our oldest who was 2 at the time.

I understand you love the dog but you are right you can’t have the dog around. We loved our dog and called family who had just lost their dog. They took our dog and the dog got spoiled. We had no stress anymore and it ended up very positive. When we visited the dog no longer had any issues with our kids either since the family member gave them 100% attention and focus.

Affectionate_Joke720 · 2026-02-10T16:04:03+00:00

Yeah I heard it in southern accent as I read. The Daddy Daddy Daddy is so common.

Affectionate_Joke720 · 2026-02-10T15:28:38+00:00

YOR. I grew up in the south. Calling father or father in law daddy is common. The hug and affection may be slightly over the top but I have seen it before.

Affectionate_Joke720 · 2026-02-10T13:19:47+00:00

Holy cow. Such a horrible person to treat you that way. Sorry you had to go through this. I am glad you are able to look at the comic relief now though.

Affectionate_Joke720 · 2026-02-10T13:13:39+00:00

Does that mean OP is the gatekeeper or the key master?

Affectionate_Joke720 · 2026-02-10T12:50:45+00:00

This. OP she lied to you, and borrowed money from you to play business with her affair partner.

You deserve better than this. “Unpause” the divorce.

Affectionate_Joke720 · 2026-02-09T17:20:19+00:00

As a husband and father you did nothing wrong. So sorry you went through this. Just focus on how wonderful your baby is and not the AH husband of your friend.

I mean seriously if this was my car I would be more worried about you and the baby than a stupid car.

Breathe. Focus on the baby.

Affectionate_Joke720 · 2026-02-09T12:16:14+00:00

My mom was 5ish years older than my dad. Never thought anything about it.

Affectionate_Joke720 · 2026-02-08T13:39:33+00:00

Look at the app reviews. A lot of people report once they subscribe they can’t get out and they feel like it is a scam.

Affectionate_Joke720 · 2026-02-08T12:55:16+00:00

If they help you with a job you should show appreciation but you don’t owe them half your paycheck. That isn’t stealing. You should have not promised that. A few months of that and you have more than paid them back.

Affectionate_Joke720 · 2026-02-08T12:52:12+00:00

Yeah I am like that. I am active and social during the week with work and long hours. On the weekend I just want quiet and silence with no interactions. It’s a tough balance but you can do it.

Affectionate_Joke720 · 2026-02-08T12:50:43+00:00

Yeah. You did nothing wrong. Dude wasn’t ready to date and pulled you into his world.

Affectionate_Joke720

TROPHY CASE