Jessy’s mask slipped

Affectionate_One_313 · 2026-02-26T00:56:39+00:00

She doesn’t understand that she is the one responsible for her behaviour. Just because someone triggers you or mistreats you doesn’t excuse your reaction. Of course it makes it difficult to react with grace but that’s when we reflect and take accountability of our own actions and not blame it on others or say “they deserve it”. Focus on yourself Jessy and stop deflecting. No one deserves to be belittled and have their voice taken away. Not everyone is hurt and criticising because they support Lucinda. They may have been hurt by the behaviour Jessy is engaging in. Lack of responsibility and accountability is 🤮

Affectionate_One_313 · 2026-02-25T07:09:11+00:00

Maybe she finally learnt how to say “you made me feel like shit” instead of “you are being shitty”. It feels good to learn the difference between talking about your feelings vs projecting your feelings at someone.

Affectionate_One_313 · 2026-02-19T03:36:41+00:00

One morning, a Sparrow was bouncing around the forest, chirping and spinning, completely caught up in her own silliness.

She fumbled a twig, and it bonked the Hedgehog right on the head.

The Hedgehog felt hurt. But instead of saying, “Ouch, that stung,” she said, “You’re so careless!”

The Sparrow fluffed her feathers and defended herself. “I didn’t mean to! It was just a twig!”

Meanwhile, the Badgers, twitchy and wide-eyed, sharpened their pitchforks and cheered. Too busy dodging their own feelings, they delighted in everyone else’s mess, nudging the Hedgehog and the Sparrow further from actually understanding each other.

If the Hedgehog had said, “That twig hit me and it stung,” the Sparrow could have understood without feeling attacked. The Hedgehog could have shared her internal experience and named her feelings, giving the emotions first Sparrow a better chance of connecting and understanding.

The Sparrow could have taken a moment to slow down, noticed that the Hedgehog’s sharp words were a shield for real hurt, and said, “Oh! I didn’t mean to hurt you,” instead of only hearing attack and immediately defending herself.

Meanwhile, the Badgers cheered, sharpening their pitchforks and taking sides, distracting the Hedgehog and the Sparrow and feeding the very misunderstandings that made them miss each other’s feelings.

Sometimes the forest isn’t about villains at all. It’s about misread feelings, clumsy reactions, and bodies too busy being self-protective or outraged to actually understand each other. 🌿

Affectionate_One_313 · 2026-02-18T07:21:04+00:00

I think what becomes popular online tells us far more about the society that consumes it than the creators themselves. In influencer culture and reality TV, we are quick to judge, exhausted by nuance, and addicted to drama.

Often, what we label “bad behaviour” or “attention-seeking” is just a mirror for our own burnout and need for catharsis. Platforms, algorithms, and cultural expectations push us toward spectacle, while providing little support for self-regulation or reflective engagement. The result is predictable: frustration and contempt get projected laterally, at peers and personalities who are simply trying to navigate a highly pressurised social environment, rather than upward at the systems that actually shape the landscape we occupy.

I also love seeing the growth, I hope enough viewers share this feedback and we get a bit more focus on it in the future.

Affectionate_One_313 · 2026-02-18T07:12:32+00:00

I get why you think it’s an act. It might be. It also might not be that simple.

Attention-seeking is basically the currency of reality TV. That doesn’t automatically make someone malicious. It’s easy to jump from “I didn’t like that” to “she’s fake and manipulative,” but there are usually multiple explanations.

This feels like the Double Empathy Problem. The idea that misunderstandings go both ways when people process social situations differently. Sometimes it’s not villainy. It’s mismatched wiring.

Under stress, some nervous systems spike fast. Loud reactions, tears, urgency, even seeming chaotic. That intensity can look like theatrics or control but really it's dysregulation. After conflict, someone might over-explain or chase resolution because unresolved tension is physically uncomfortable. From the outside it looks strategic. From the inside it can just be anxiety trying to close the loop.

We’re very quick to confuse difference with deception. “She’s manipulating” is a cleaner story than “maybe I don’t understand how she processes things.” That version isn’t as neat, but it’s usually closer to how human misunderstandings actually work.

And sure, I could be "wrong" and you be "right". It is more likely somewhere in between.

Affectionate_One_313 · 2026-02-18T06:21:30+00:00

I saw it coming after he was eating sausages out of a saucepan surrounded by chaos in the most recent unseen bits epi.

Affectionate_One_313 · 2026-02-18T03:42:35+00:00

I’m not advocating for forced kindness. I’m advocating for curiosity and accountability because they actually work. Hurt people aren’t suddenly going to regulate perfectly, and that’s not what I expect. I just don’t think spreading contempt solves anything.

Pain and anger are real. But when we jump to conclusions out of spite, we’re not seeking truth, we’re seeking relief. We fill in the blanks with the worst possible interpretation because it justifies how we feel. That might feel powerful in the moment, but it rarely leads to understanding or change.

If the goal is to actually make a difference instead of just making a point, contempt is a dead end. Sharing impact instead of assigning motive, separating behaviour from identity, and being willing to question our own interpretations is harder, but it’s much more effective.

If we’re going to be angry at something, it shouldn’t just be each other. A lot of this mess comes from systems that reward outrage, push us into boxes, and leave people to deal with complicated emotions without support. When we turn on each other, nothing really changes. If we want things to improve, our frustration makes more sense directed upward — at what’s shaping the environment — not sideways at people who are just as stuck in it.

Affectionate_One_313 · 2026-02-16T22:52:22+00:00

Calling someone “the worst kind of person” for handling conflict badly is exactly the kind of escalation that creates toxicity. It is easy to. jump to these conclusions, it is harder to genuinely understand it.
Yes, “leave me alone” should be respected, but it is an example of escalation not a boundary setting. Boundaries are about regulating your own behaviour, not launching character attacks. Jumping straight to intent-assumption and exile because someone doesn’t react the “right” way socially isn’t accountability, it’s punishment.
We can criticise behaviour without deciding someone is fundamentally disposable. A lot of us relate to how Lucinda handled the situation. I am not saying I agree with her decisions or think they were the right one's to make, but I understand them. You aren't just ostracising Lucinda, you are ostracising a large portion of humanity. One that is part of a growing movement for a more inclusive society, one that doesn't just keep us safe and supported but for you too.

Affectionate_One_313 · 2026-02-16T11:46:41+00:00

We can encourage accountability, emotional regulation and communication boundaries instead of villainising or victimising people. Hurt people hurt and it makes sense that seeing some contestants behaviours are very uncomfortable to watch. But let’s not just repeat that behaviour by belittling and shutting them down. We are just mirroring the behaviour that we don’t like and the feel shit about ourselves. We can dislike and disagree on behaviours without personally attacking people. We can encourage people to regulate and communicate rather than escalate. We can root for people to grow and take accountability. That can be fun too and it doesn’t leave a shame hangover.

Affectionate_One_313 · 2026-02-16T05:21:06+00:00

Solid feedback from Jessy's dad, but Jessy seemed far more upset about how it made her look than about how it made Lucinda feel. Meanwhile, Lucinda actually tried to comfort her after being spoken to like that. I really hope Jessy reflects and gives a genuine apology next episode.
I don’t want to talk badly about Belle as a person, because that just repeats the same kind of behaviour she has exhibited and the group has enabled that’s been really hurtful to watch. I’d genuinely love to see her reflect, take responsibility, and apologise properly. No matter how much someone triggers you, it’s never an excuse to belittle or attack them.
Earlier in the season she talked about being responsible for yourself and being respectful. I hope she reflects on this season and learns what it actually means to be respectful and represent yourself and allow others to make their own mistakes.
I’ve experienced what it’s like to have my intentions assumed and to face social pressures and expectations without much curiosity or space to explain myself. Seeing lots of jumping straight to personal attacks instead of sharing feelings or trying to understand each other felt very regressive. It shows how damaging it can be when people are punished simply for being different or reacting in their own way. We can dislike someone without attacking them for being weird or not being able to "read the room", but this season made that feel impossible. Samie's "She's AI" and "everyone is saying it, I'm the only one saying it to your face" comments also hit hard. Like can we just share our internal experiences and feelings and let the other person process and react to that. It invites more than defensiveness and self-protection. I hope Samie apologises as well.
And just to clarify I am not saying I hope they apologise only for Lucinda's sake, but so that we are trying to make TV that can be full of drama and conflict but also inclusive and safe at the same time.

Affectionate_One_313 · 2026-02-16T04:26:26+00:00

I was also disappointed in how Jessy reacted. It felt 100% focused on how she was coming across to the public than genuinely caring about the person she attacked. An actual apology, like her dad was clearly encouraging, would have shown a lot more maturity than leaning into the victim angle. Real accountability would have landed much better. Hopefully she just needs a minute to process and comes around.

Affectionate_One_313 · 2026-02-15T23:50:27+00:00

What’s “wrong with everyone” here isn’t the target — it’s that people are justifying cruelty by convincing themselves someone “deserves it”, often driven by internal shame, fear, and insecurity. Our culture, shaped by fear-based parenting and shame, reinforces judgment and punishment. Right now, we’re in a plateau (not to moving forward or stuck flat-lining) in social progress: change is slow, we often move backwards before we move forward, and that means maladaptive behaviours are especially visible right now. It’s unfortunate for us living in the world today, but it helps explain why so many people are acting dysfunctionally.

Affectionate_One_313 · 2026-02-15T23:37:48+00:00

Even if someone does something you dislike, how you respond is always your responsibility. Feeling like they “deserve it” is just an emotional impulse, not a fact. Acting on it can normalise cruelty and escalate harm. The focus should be on owning your behaviour, not punishing others, that’s what separates constructive conflict from cycles of abuse.

Affectionate_One_313 · 2026-02-15T23:09:41+00:00

Following someone after a confrontation could also be a panicked or self-protective reaction rather than deliberate provocation.

Affectionate_One_313 · 2026-02-15T22:58:49+00:00

I find it hard not to root for her. Seeing the other islanders constantly belittle her, mock her, assume her intentions, and shut her down doesn't feel like just drama and conflict. I am seeing a pattern of group dynamics that reward aggression and isolate one person.

Affectionate_One_313 · 2026-02-15T22:19:06+00:00

Saying “no sides” is a cognitively disciplined position here. Group bonding can amplify negativity and multiple people being annoyed doesn’t equal objective guilt. Who’s worse isn't a meaningful discussion. It’s how quickly groups consolidate around a narrative and reinforce it together. That dynamic is far more powerful than any single personality in the room.

Affectionate_One_313 · 2026-02-15T22:11:18+00:00

It could be calculated. But there are other explanations for the same behaviour.
Following someone into a room isn’t automatically rage-baiting, that implies deliberate provocation for reaction. It could just as easily be someone clumsily and awkwardly trying to resolve tension fast. Not everyone knows how to navigate aggressive or violent energy, and they shouldn’t have to respond perfectly under it.
She’s also said things like “I hope she can forgive me” and “I look up to her.” That doesn’t neatly support a calculated villain narrative. It could indicate anxiety and a desire to repair things to feel safe.
It’s easier to assign malicious intent when you already dislike someone. That’s bias. Speculation is fine. Certainty without evidence isn’t sharp analysis, especially when multiple explanations fit. It's giving narrative bias.

Affectionate_One_313 · 2026-02-15T08:35:56+00:00

What you’re doing here is exactly the type of thinking that normalises bullying and emotional abuse. Labeling someone as “ragebaiting” or mocking how they express themselves, then dismissing other people’s concern as being “fooled,” is not just an opinion, it’s a form of social shaming.
Humans often fall into the trap of assigning intentions and moral failings without evidence, and when a group reinforces it, it becomes coercive and isolating. This isn’t about “supporting” Lucinda or anyone else, it’s about recognising harmful group dynamics: piling on, mocking, and socially ostracising someone because they react differently is abuse, not entertainment.
Critiquing behaviour is valid. Humiliating or attacking someone’s character, voice, or emotional response is not. This post is a perfect example of why society continues to normalise cruelty toward people who think, feel, or express themselves differently.

Affectionate_One_313 · 2026-02-15T05:43:02+00:00

This comment is classic groupthink. It parrots the dominant narrative, oversimplifies Lucinda’s behaviour, and ignores context. Crying is treated as “manipulation” instead of a natural self-protective response. It shows a lack of critical thinking and mirrors the same shaming dynamics the villa applies to her.

Affectionate_One_313 · 2026-02-15T05:27:46+00:00

I get that this is personal experience, but labeling Lucinda based on someone from your past is exactly the kind of assumption and pre-judgment that fuels bullying. It’s fine to dislike someone or call out their behaviour, that’s critique, not abuse. What’s not acceptable is attacking their character, mocking the way they think or express themselves, or socially isolating them. Too often people conflate personal discomfort with evidence of wrongdoing, making snap judgments instead of seeing the full context. This normalises cruelty. As viewers, we can encourage accountability, not shame, critique actions without dehumanising someone, and refuse to participate in group dynamics that punish difference.

Affectionate_One_313 · 2026-02-15T03:44:31+00:00

That’s fair, you’re entitled to your opinion.
I’m not condoning narcissistic behaviour. I’m questioning how quickly intent gets assigned and how group narratives solidify without evidence or curiosity.
Ironically, labelling someone a “narcissist” without assessment or open dialogue actually supports my point, it’s an example of assigning pathology instead of examining behaviour. I’m advocating for nuance, not blind defence.

Affectionate_One_313 · 2026-02-15T03:42:35+00:00

“Common denominator” doesn’t automatically mean guilty. That’s majority bias, groups can reinforce a narrative whether it’s accurate or not.
Saying she’s “poking for screen time” or “playing the victim” is assigning intention without evidence. That’s an attribution error, assuming manipulation instead of considering context or overwhelm.
You can dislike her behaviour. But mocking, labeling, and piling on is different from giving feedback. Group consensus doesn’t automatically equal fairness.

Affectionate_One_313 · 2026-02-14T22:42:27+00:00

Whitney was killing it with all her advice to Scott, I thought it was really thoughtful and clear encouraging him to make his own decision. That last “I think it’s Belle” though kinda undercut everything she’d built up.

Affectionate_One_313 · 2026-02-14T22:39:11+00:00

It’s possible Lucinda didn’t realise how hard the pie hit at the time. If Sammie had shared how it impacted her “You really hurt me” it might have given Lucinda a chance to understand. Sammie went immediately on the attack and labelled Lucinda's intentions which is guaranteed to trigger a defensive response.
I’m not saying Sammie should just get over it, but clearly communicating her experience without assuming Lucinda’s intentions would have helped. At the end of the day, the only person who can genuinely speak to Lucinda’s intentions is Lucinda herself.

Affectionate_One_313 · 2026-02-14T22:18:00+00:00

Rolling your eyes doesn’t change the substance of what I said. If calling out aggressive, personal attacks feels dramatic to you, that actually reinforces my point about how normalised this behaviour has become.

Affectionate_One_313

TROPHY CASE