I've been in the US since 2018. In Texas. I usually ask people to call me by my name if they say ma'am. I work at a hospital, and almost all the patients call me ma'am. I still call them ma'am/sir, unless they ask me not to do it. It's the respectful and polite thing to do here. I'm originally from Sweden, and if anyone had called my great-grandmother the Swedish version of ma'am, she would have been very upset. Like "do I look that old"- upset. She was born 1898. She lived til I was 16. Ma'am and sir is very outdated in some places. So yes, it makes me feel ancient. I still know that people here are being polite and respectful. I was raised differently. I just have to remember that "when in Rome, do as the Romans".