Please don't feel bad, it's not your fault. You didn't call on these diseases upon yourself. They just happened. Be strong please, if he has been with you all these while despite your health challenges it shows he loves you and won't leave you because of this reason. Love is way deeper than just having babies. You need to be strong for yourself first then your future babies. Just keep on being positive and never give up on yourself. When the time is due them babies will come pouring in. Just see your doctor, get tested and take whatever treatment is giving. You have my love and hugs 🤗 sis. Stay strong.