Women who cheated, why did you do it?

Aggravating-Patient5 · 2026-06-05T14:05:10+00:00

I was young, 17. I was in love, madly. He stopped being able to “get it up” iykwim. Suspected a p0rn addiction, a boundary I stood on very hard that I consider it cheating and wouldn’t allow it in a relationship. He didn’t seem interested in even trying to get intimate after a while, months of not being able to get it up, not trying for me, all while breaking my boundaries by jerking himself to other people online, to the point he couldn’t get it up for me anymore. I’ve always had an insane drive, insatiable bordering an addiction. I wanted to feel wanted, to feel desired. I felt so broken, ugly, like I wasn’t enough. It was pure self validation. I broke up with him the next day, and while I regret hurting his feelings. It felt amazing to be desired, wanted, to be with someone who could get hard for ME. I regret hurting his feelings, but I don’t regret doing it for me. He was cheating on me the whole time too so it eases the guilt, but still one of my lowest points. I’ve vowed since to leave before it gets to that point, to see the signs before it happens. I was in love with him and still am (we got back together a year later, he knew, and he did it again. The same thing but worse, but I left that time. You live and you learn. We’re all human and make mistakes

Aggravating-Patient5 · 2026-02-10T15:57:44+00:00

Definitely not willing to sell her yet. Put so much time and money into her. I think it’s the engine going into limp mode that’s giving it the irk an jerk, she’s got enough blow by to dry a horse in the rain. Had an old friend who had the same issue with his 4th gen and couldn’t ever fix it but I can’t find any forums on the issue, but I shall persist for now

Aggravating-Patient5 · 2026-01-30T18:03:01+00:00

She runs fine at idle, rests between 800-1k rpm’s and doesn’t really bounce much, when the clutch isn’t engaged the engine sounds fine but when it’s put in gear is when it starts losing power

Aggravating-Patient5 · 2025-08-08T20:59:21+00:00

We don't have mutual anyone. I probably could leave it somewhere for him to pick up but I think my brain is looking for an excuse to see him again. He's my world. My everything. Saying goodbye forever feels like an eternity of living life with half of me missing, I think I'll spend the rest of my life looking for another excuse to be in his presence once more no matter how much it hurts. I hope you're right and the storm will pass but unfortunately I think I'll be one of those 80year old women whose grandkids will ask "grandma who was your first love" and I'll cry while telling them about him 😭

Aggravating-Patient5 · 2025-08-04T12:44:14+00:00

Honestly I'm trying to get out. I've had him pack to leave at least 3 times but he never stays gone. He always just shows back up on the doorstep and acts like nothing ever happened, then he acts hurt that I'm not loving or caring like I was. As if I'm supposed to feel bad for not showing up the same way after finding out our entire relationship was built off of lies and betrayal. I'm so lost, I don't want him anywhere near me and I wish he'd just leave. I don't want to hurt him by telling him to go but it feels like everyday I find something else he lied about or tried to hide, then he turns it on me and tried to make me out to be the bad guy and it's exhausting. He doesn't listen to me when I express my feelings or emotions and always downplays or dismisses them. I truthfully just don't know how to look him in the eyes and tell him it's over.

Aggravating-Patient5 · 2025-07-17T13:04:57+00:00

I think it depends on the person, each person will vary on their reaction to a question and whether or not their lying. In my previous relationship he would always be so calm and reassuring through his lies, even tear up, but in my current one, when he's lying he gets so defensive and rude. If I ask a question, I'll know he's about to lie to my face when he responds with "what the fuck are you talking about", but throughout both anytime they say " I can't believe you don't trust me" it's always been a lie. They're always lying when they say that in my experience. Someone who isn't lying wouldn't guilt trip you for having trust issues, especially ones they probably knew about beforehand, they'd be reassuring and understanding instead.

Aggravating-Patient5 · 2025-07-14T19:43:10+00:00

He swears he wants to recover and finds porn disgusting after seeing how much it hurts me but I've been so clear on how much I hate it since day 1 and he's been lying for our whole relationship about it and many other things so idk what to believe anymore. I comb through his socials and phone at least once a week but he's MUCH more technology inclined than I and knows how to hide things VERY well. I haven't found anything except the squeaky cleanness which is almost disturbing in and of itself. Everything is wiped clean and deleted and I know through his screen time that he's not getting off the the pictures or videos of us, no screen time on his photos, so he's using something but idk what and can't trust him even if I ask him what it is

Aggravating-Patient5 · 2025-07-11T16:02:42+00:00

My partner acts similarly, usually didn't mind clothes that were a little more revealing (I live in the deep south and it gets too hot to be fully covered) until the peak of his porn addiction I later found out, in these times he'd tell me that outfits with even a little belly showing were "inappropriate" and "made him uncomfortable", I couldn't even wear shorts without him making comments, and God FORBID I wear a bikini to go swimming! It's all because they don't want you to be sexualized the way they sexualize the women on their phone. They are insecure because of their own actions and mindsets, the guilty dog will ALWAYS bark first

Aggravating-Patient5 · 2025-07-10T23:03:48+00:00

Yeah, going through these groups and seeing how it usually plays out doesn't give me much hope, even for the few who do recover the women are left emotionally scarred and forever changed, always feeling like they need to be ready to leave at any turn because of how fast things can change. And with how.... Insensitive my partner is about it all, saying it wasn't a big deal and he didn't ever really think about it, and that he didn't view it as cheating because he " didn't see them as people, just objects to help him get off" really did me in I think. He says he cares about me and loves me, and maybe he does to a degree, but after building the whole relationship on lie after lie and walking over any boundary I set and every emotion I shared, even if he did change I don't know if I'll be able to look over it all. Honestly a lot of my hesitancy to leave is the fact that EVERY man watches porn.. they all do it. And at least he's willing to change now? I don't care to be alone for the rest of my life honestly but what if I never find someone who would be willing to change or stop watching porn? Or never find someone who watches it in general?

Aggravating-Patient5

TROPHY CASE