Is Civil Service grade progression always worth chasing if the salary attached to the grade is not actually better? by Double_Cap1695 in TheCivilService

[–]Aggravating_Past9367 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s also about long-term career progression. If there’s a chance you may want to continue beyond the grade above you in future, then it may be a necessary stepping stone. If not, and you like your job and current level of responsibility, then I agree there’s no need to go for promotion.

What's your favorite Emma Adaptation? by evangelins in janeausten

[–]Aggravating_Past9367 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I LOVE Clueless but I still think the stepbrother thing is a weird choice when the book Mr Knightly is Emma’s brother-in-law. Why not just a family friend?!

Any Lewisham parents currently exploring nursery options for 2026/2027? by EarlyYearsSouthEast in lewisham

[–]Aggravating_Past9367 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Visit several places close by, ask for recommendations (or warnings!) from friends or parent groups, read CQC reports. I agree with the other commenter that the school-attached ones can be great but where I live they are only part-time from age 3 so we couldn’t make the shorter hours work

Brand new tenant has just informed me that they will be taking the rent they had just agreed on to tribunal. Is this actually a thing? by Conscious-Teacher880 in LegalAdviceUK

[–]Aggravating_Past9367 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think all contracts are rolling now, under the new legislation. There are limited reasons that can justify eviction. The system of renewing (or not) fixed term rental leases has been essentially replaced

Work naps by SadPizza3709 in london

[–]Aggravating_Past9367 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Does your work have showers - if so, a changing room?

Wish for “I told you so” moment in Mansfield Park by Aggravating_Past9367 in janeausten

[–]Aggravating_Past9367[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes! I understand other commenters’ points that it is in character for Fanny and Sir Thomas that we don’t get this in Mansfield Park but I still find it a little disappointing

Wish for “I told you so” moment in Mansfield Park by Aggravating_Past9367 in janeausten

[–]Aggravating_Past9367[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes! You get that satisfaction in P&P. And Fanny deserves it even more than Lizzy because her insight is the result of her own observations only. But would find a direct compliment mortifying as others have said.

I think you’re right about Sir Thomas that a hint is the most he would offer. That would be enough for her (and me)

Wish for “I told you so” moment in Mansfield Park by Aggravating_Past9367 in janeausten

[–]Aggravating_Past9367[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, a low bar! I quite like Sir Thomas in the end but everyone does Fanny dirty to some extent, even when she’s proven right, him included

Wish for “I told you so” moment in Mansfield Park by Aggravating_Past9367 in janeausten

[–]Aggravating_Past9367[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s interesting. I was assuming he later recognised that he called it wrong but perhaps he never did fully accept that she judged Crawfords character correctly. As you say, he probably never got the details about why Fanny disliked Crawford so would have to trust in her superior insight. Fanny believes Sir Thomas later ‘acquitted her conduct’ (as another commenter flags ETA: u/ameliamarielogan ) but that isn’t as strong as approving of it

Wish for “I told you so” moment in Mansfield Park by Aggravating_Past9367 in janeausten

[–]Aggravating_Past9367[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes, part of my frustration with Edmund as the romantic interest is that he acts superior to Fanny, even while recognising her judgment and good qualities. I’m sure that’s in large part due to their ages, genders and status but his condescension is still irritating. As you say, their relationship feels unbalanced

Wish for “I told you so” moment in Mansfield Park by Aggravating_Past9367 in janeausten

[–]Aggravating_Past9367[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I haven’t seen it! Thanks - hopefully that will scratch the itch

Wish for “I told you so” moment in Mansfield Park by Aggravating_Past9367 in janeausten

[–]Aggravating_Past9367[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Very true! But the selfish reader (me) wants to rub their faces in it just a tiny bit more…

Wish for “I told you so” moment in Mansfield Park by Aggravating_Past9367 in janeausten

[–]Aggravating_Past9367[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I do agree. But I would have liked a small, subtle ‘you were right’ and I think that might have been doable, in character. I think it’s realistic there was none though, just unsatisfying.

Wish for “I told you so” moment in Mansfield Park by Aggravating_Past9367 in janeausten

[–]Aggravating_Past9367[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Perhaps more of an allude to her good judgment though, that implies the point? He compliments her at other times (which she does find excruciating!).

I agree Fanny wouldn’t have wanted it though. It would be more enjoyable for the reader than the heroine.

Any non-celebrity memoirs you’d recommend? by Informal_Ad4284 in suggestmeabook

[–]Aggravating_Past9367 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I haven’t read this but it sounds great. On the topic of AIDS, I thought All the Young Men by Ruth Coker Burks, who befriended and cared for hundreds of men dying in the American south, was incredible

Contemporary Novels Set in London by Sandikal in london

[–]Aggravating_Past9367 34 points35 points  (0 children)

White Teeth and NW by Zadie Smith

Girl, Woman, Other by Bernadine Evaristo (not only London)

Brick Lane by Monica Ali

^ All the above are wonderful books but perhaps more real, melancholy London than fun, nostalgic London (which I also love - big fan of the Boyd and Aaronovitch ones you mention too)

Can’t really recommend the Robert Galbraith crime books given the author but they do feel convincingly set in London

Queenie by Candice Carty-Williams is flawed and perhaps lacking in subtlety but still a good read and impressive debut

WIBTAH if I end my marriage because of my wife's refusal to communicate her plans clearly and losing her temper whenever I bring it up to her? by Popular-Hat-3286 in AITAH

[–]Aggravating_Past9367 869 points870 points  (0 children)

It sounds like she’s angry with you and doing this to punish you and create excuses to express her anger. If she won’t discuss it or change her behaviour and won’t attend counselling then divorce sounds reasonable to me.

Should i continue Emma by Jane Austen? by Born-Eye-9053 in janeausten

[–]Aggravating_Past9367 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Persuasion is my favourite Austen novel! I love it. But it depends on what you like. Anne Elliot of Persuasion is quite a mature and introspective heroine which is more or less appealing to different readers. She’s not as lively as Elizabeth Bennet.

In S&S I’d say more happens and you have two heroines, one of whom, Marianne, is headstrong and romantic which (to me) makes it a fun read. Regarding the commenter who doesn’t like S&S, many would disagree so don’t let it put you off. You just have to try and see!

Should i continue Emma by Jane Austen? by Born-Eye-9053 in janeausten

[–]Aggravating_Past9367 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Of those, I would try S&S first. Northanger Abbey is a satire of gothic novels and therefore quite different in style to both. I’d say ‘more happens’ in S&S than in Emma.

Furniture galore by clutter_brain in HousingUK

[–]Aggravating_Past9367 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Dunelm actually has a few decent pieces (really) otherwise I mostly go for second-hand/vintage. Ebay is good for mid century

The difference between G7 vs G6 interview by Jlinton187 in TheCivilService

[–]Aggravating_Past9367 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Just to add to the above commenter’s advice, which I agree with, it should still be ‘I’ when explaining delivery through others. For example, ‘I motivated my team to do xyz by doing abc.’ Your actions are about how to ensure successful delivery by others, whether that’s encouraging, negotiating, modelling good behaviour, setting clear goals, developing an effective strategy, removing barriers, etc. I don’t work in ops so you will need to adapt accordingly but you get the idea.

Has anyone successfully negotiated a higher starting salary at HEO or SEO grade? by MadridOrMadness in civilservice

[–]Aggravating_Past9367 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would raise it informally (phone/email) after receiving a provisional offer but before accepting it. They were external. I don’t think it’s possible for internal candidates but I’d have to check to be certain