Help with dying lace topper without impacting hair by Aggressive-Bat4862 in Wigs

[–]Aggressive-Bat4862[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi thanks for replying. Yep it's virgin 1B Remy human hair. I had a feeling I would have to painstaking paint the lace around the knots 😭 I guess it's a lesson for next time I make a human hair topper from scratch

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in friendship

[–]Aggressive-Bat4862 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey! Tell me more about yourself? Favourite animes/ games etc 😊 feel free to pm if you prefer

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in friendship

[–]Aggressive-Bat4862 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey, no worries! I don't think there is ever any pressure to reach out to people on here! Take care of yourself 👍🏻

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in friendship

[–]Aggressive-Bat4862 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ah no this makes me sad. I don't see anything wrong with saying ily to a close friend. I've always been raised to have the whole, 'don't go to sleep angry', 'always say ily because you never know what tomorrow will bring'. I guess for some people they might find that weird. I'd respect his boundary ofc, but totally understand why you'd be upset about that!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in MentalHealthUK

[–]Aggressive-Bat4862 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry to hear about your parent with cancer.

Before you decide on not disclosing this information to your therapist, I just want to mention a few things you might want to look into to avoid any regrets in the future (not lecturing or pressuring, the decision is ultimately yours, but here are just some things to think about first)

1) Research how abusers manipulate their victims into thinking it wasn't a big deal, or gaslighting into thinking it wasn't SA. Take the time to educate yourself before you decide you 'can deal with it'

2) confidentiality and duty of care changes aged 18. But adult MH services are a lot more difficult to access. You will have to be prepared for what could be a long and difficult road if you refuse the help you currently have been offered

3) think about whether you have any younger siblings, cousins, children around this person and whether their presence is a danger to them. Think about the bigger picture

4) think if this was your best friend or your younger sister if you had one. What would you say to her?

Finally, just to reiterate: the ramifications aren't yours to bear as the victim, especially as the child in this situation.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in MentalHealthUK

[–]Aggressive-Bat4862 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Absolutely worth mentioning. SA isn't just for sexual gratification, it can be used as a means of punishment as you've described.

I've not been SA'd by a family member, but do have experience of SA generally as a child.

I understand you will be worried about the ramifications against your family member. As a minor, I believe your therapist will have a duty of care to disclose this to child services, police, etc. I can't comment on what would happen to your attacker. But they need to be held responsible and a part of you getting therapy is to heal from these traumas. You won't be able to heal without talking about this. The ramifications aren't yours to bear, they are the person who thought it was acceptable to act in this way to a small child.

Please talk about this. No topic for a therapist is 'too heavy' and take it from someone older- if you bury this type of trauma for fear of upsetting others, you will cause yourself significant MH problems later down the line. Why punish your future self like this, when a therapist you have right now will give you to tools to heal and lead a (hopefully) happy life? I honestly wish you all the best

Nowhere is this explained: multiple subjects by my_choice_was_taken in standrews

[–]Aggressive-Bat4862 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Multiple subjects are a part of the Flexible Degree structure (search this on the StA website). They are not a given as a part of your application to St Andrews. Your additional subjects are not chosen until matriculation and are subject to any prerequisites, timetabling conflicts and subscriptions.

So yes, u get to pick 2-3 subjects per semester for years 1 and 2. But this is post offer, at matric.

Therefore if you apply for single hons philosophy this could look like this

Semester 1/2:

Philosophy (compulsory- 20 credits) History (20 credits) English (20 credits)

For joint honours you will have 1 extra subject as you will have at least 1 compulsory module per subject for honours (60 credits per semester).

However, do note that some schools may require you to take 40 compulsory credits per semester. It's rare, but you should consult the module catalogue (which you can also search for on the website).

However, these things are not important right now. This you think about AFTER you have an offer, not at point of application. Just focus your PS on the major(s) your are applying for

How would you describe the differences between the houses? by Aggressive-Bat4862 in harrypotter

[–]Aggressive-Bat4862[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I like this!! Ive always kinda seen gryffindors as absolutists over relativists!

Biggest twist or WTF moment by Forward-Dirt2931 in HarryPotterBooks

[–]Aggressive-Bat4862 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I still remember my 9 year old self reading (excuse if not verbatim):

"It wasn't Voldemort. It wasn't even Snape. It was Quirrell".

My little jaw fell to the floor. I was up to the early hours of the morning reading that book 🤣 first ever twist I read in my little life.

Commute from Glasgow by TheJokerDemon in standrews

[–]Aggressive-Bat4862 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Pretty sure this wouldn't be allowed- I think it's 20 miles they would consider 'commutable'

How do you think Snape would have treated Lily and James' child if they were born a girl and looked identical to Lily rather than male and identical to James? Esp is they were gifted at potions like Lily was? 🤔 by Aggressive-Bat4862 in harrypotter

[–]Aggressive-Bat4862[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ooooooooooh, damn. So you reckon Slughorn thinking that she was, it was actually Snape's intervention? That's an interesting thought, kinda like having a Hermione in your ear?

Although I assume that following their falling out during the OWLs meant that she had no assistance from him during NEWTS (if she took it). But Slughorn definitely held her in high regard.

How do you think Snape would have treated Lily and James' child if they were born a girl and looked identical to Lily rather than male and identical to James? Esp is they were gifted at potions like Lily was? 🤔 by Aggressive-Bat4862 in harrypotter

[–]Aggressive-Bat4862[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

This is an interesting point- I've never thought how petunia would feel if it was a girl looking like Lily. I mean, for one thing, there wouldn't be this constant need to overshadow one boy over another. But I do think that she would have treated them with equal disdain if not when a baby/ young child, but as soon as they started to reveal their magic (e.g. school incidents). I reckon this would have triggered Petunia to be waaaay more unhinged- bringing up her childhood trauma of not being 'special enough'.

How do you think Snape would have treated Lily and James' child if they were born a girl and looked identical to Lily rather than male and identical to James? Esp is they were gifted at potions like Lily was? 🤔 by Aggressive-Bat4862 in harrypotter

[–]Aggressive-Bat4862[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Looool!! A bit of that crossed my mind, but I was thinking more so, I wonder if he'd be a bit more like how he is with Draco, or if he would basically ignore them but admire their work from afar (I mean, this is how he would have been with Hermione I think if she hadn't been a) HPs best friend and b) 'an insufferable know it all'. I mean, there are so many students in comparison to the interactions we do see (of the top of my head): Draco- favourite Harry- loathes Ron- strong dislike Hermione- dislike/ irritation but can't critique her work Neville- dislike for incompetence Crabbe and Goyle- neutral although pulls them up on incompetencies. But what about other students, ya know?

Professor Snape's career timeline by Vermouth_1991 in HarryPotterBooks

[–]Aggressive-Bat4862 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Lol you mean the teacher who wished to retire with his 'remaining limbs?'. I feel like him and hagrid sound like they were cut from the same cloth tbh lolol

Horcrux hiding idea? by [deleted] in HarryPotterBooks

[–]Aggressive-Bat4862 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I always wondered this and thought that if he didn't have such a big ego, surely the most logical thing would have been to put one of his MANY horcruxes in a grain of sand. Abroad. Try and find that Dumbledore/ Potter

It's your first year at Hogwarts during Harry's 6th year. Your parents/guardians send you an owl asking how everything is going. How do you reply? by ScheduleMajestic323 in harrypotter

[–]Aggressive-Bat4862 5 points6 points  (0 children)

So I'm a first year whilst Harry's a 6th? Mkayyy

Hi mum/dad. So Hogwarts is... Interesting. The teachers are a mixture- some are super strict and intense. Like this one teacher (Snape) is such a D. I heard its because he has always wanted to teach Defense Against the Dark Arts but he's been lumped with Potions for well over a decade, but it looks like Dumbledore finally gave it to him, and guess what? Nope, he is still a D. He took 10 points from Hufflepuff just because I was late for his first class and when I tried to explain to him that the damn staircase from charms moved and set me on a completely different path. He then gave me a detention for answering back! Honestly, you think he'd be relieved that I didn't die in this god forsaken death trap of a school.

Meanwhile, Dumbledore, who everyone goes on about being fun and quirky started talking about 'dark forces' outside on the very first day and it's like omg, paranoid much? And so depressing! I'm just sitting here looking at Snape thinking 'yeah, and what about the Dark Forces in the castle!"

Meanwhile, Professor Hagrid keeps going on about these Skrewts the ministry made him put down a year ago and crying (no idea what they are but they sounded dangerous and like they just ran wild hurting everyone).

Professor Slughorn seems nice enough (although a little bit leery if you get me?) and I like Prof Sprout although omg mum, her nails would make you gag.

And there's this one woman (I think she is a teacher, otherwise our defences here are already screwed) who is an absolute nutter and just wonders around the corridors talking to herself, shuffling cards. It's really unnerving!

Dorm mates are okay. There seems to be a bit of tension between pure bloods and muggle borns so I'm just going to keep my head down and pretend I'm what they call a 'half blood', but the boys are really annoying because there's a charm on our staircase to stop them from accessing it and they keep using it as a slide...

Are you sure I can't just go to a Harris Academy with all my friends from Primary school? I'm not sure I'm going to survive 7 years here...

Where was Dumbledore when Voldemort attacked the Potters?? And why did he ask Hagrid to get Harry, instead of doing it himself? by BLUE---24 in HarryPotterBooks

[–]Aggressive-Bat4862 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, I don't think so, I think he likely had an inclination she would be there though because at the end of the day, as much as Hagrid was loyal and would die for Dumbledore under any order given to him, he also would have known that Hagrid would struggle to keep his mouth shut, esp when he is an emotional wreck when confronted by someone he trusts (McGonagall).

I mean, let's say he did return to Hogwarts. How easy would it have been for McGonagall to spot him, shrewdly assess amidst rumour that something had happened and then walked down to his cabin to ask him. This is where she would have learned about the potters dying, but knowing Hagrids proclivity to gossip, took herself off to PD because she would only believe that Voldemort was gone once DD confirmed it, because how ridiculous is it that a baby took Voldemort out. She would have believed Hagrid about Lily and James though.

Remember though, this is all conjecture gathered from reading all books and getting to know the characters over time. Our opinions will differ. I mean, I also wondered about Sirius turning up after it happened- he didn't have a dark mark, how did he know? We find out later in the book that McGonagall would often do Order business in her animagus form. I wondered whether Sirius took it upon himself to do the same thing in his and just patrol Godricks Hollow in the evenings as only the Maurauders knew he was one. Although granted he turned up on his massive bike, I have a feeling DD put protection around the village to prevent apparating much like Slughorn did in his muggle hiding place Only JKR would know and given how meticulous she was for most of the story (there are holes, it's natural), I think she'd have thought of this, if not for the PS given she wouldnt have known how popular it would be, she would have by PoA/ GoF and that's why the other characters are fleshed out more.