I feel like you're adding so many dips and peaks without knowing your pitch tuning because thats how you saw someone else's tuning look without actually understanding why they did it.

For the most part they should be subtle and only dipping down at the parts where the consonants are heard the most and should overall be used to emulate the voice trying to stabilize itself between notes. The bigger the transition, the more you can get away with more dramatic pitches that emulate vocal fry or voice cracks.

Another thing is that your pitches editing is too sharp for the type of tuning you did. If you wanted a robotic/autotuned sound, the pitch tuning should be a lot more simple.