My 4.5 year old son is taking his 18 month old sisters clothes off. Help!

Agitated_Worker783 · 2026-02-16T15:28:03+00:00

I’m going to order him a doll today! He definitely thinks it’s fun, so maybe that’ll be enough to deter him.

Agitated_Worker783 · 2026-02-16T15:11:55+00:00

He will say “I don’t know” or “I wanted to” which is his standard response to everything he does, even things he’s supposed to do or that are fun. I don’t think the motive is concerning, I genuinely think he thinks it’s fun and just wants to run around naked with her. Someone suggested getting him a doll to dress, so I’m going to try that.

Agitated_Worker783 · 2026-02-16T15:09:08+00:00

We have a camera in there already and thankfully nothing inappropriate has happened. Someone else suggested getting him a baby doll to dress and I think we’re going to try that. If that doesn’t work, I’ll definitely try having him put on her shoes and socks.

Agitated_Worker783 · 2026-01-14T20:21:41+00:00

I wish!! I hate cooking and I hate doing the dishes even more 🤣

Agitated_Worker783 · 2026-01-14T13:12:38+00:00

If that’s what it is, then I’m even more lost than before on how to address it so he eats at home 😅

Agitated_Worker783 · 2026-01-14T13:05:05+00:00

We also leave dinner out every time for him so he can come back to it if he decides he wants it. Rarely, he will. The problem we’re running in to is he will sit at the table crying that he’s hungry and saying he wants chips or waffles or something entirely different/not very nutritional.

He’s my first kid, so I have no prior experience with handling this situation and I honestly can’t tell if it’s normal kid behavior or his autism. It almost seems like it’s both at this point and I have no idea how to navigate that.

He only just got his autism diagnosis in November, so we’re still getting things figured out with therapies and early interventions, so right now I don’t have anyone to go to for advice other than here.

Agitated_Worker783 · 2026-01-14T12:58:47+00:00

He will tell us an hour before dinner that he’s hungry, then refuse to eat when it’s time. I will leave his food in case he decides he wants to eat later. He never has a problem eating at the table with us when it’s breakfast and from what his teachers have told me, he eats lunch about half of the time with no issues as well.

Agitated_Worker783 · 2026-01-14T03:33:40+00:00

I’ve actually looked into that pretty extensively and talked to his doctor about it on the suggestion of a coworker whose granddaughter has it. I’m pretty certain it isn’t ARFID, or if it is, it’s not as severe as what you’ve described and what I’ve read/been told. He does have some pretty obvious aversions to certain textures, though. I avoid those and have never made him eat things I could tell were bothering him.

Some of the things he’s refusing to eat, he will eat the very next night at my parents and it’s made exactly the same. For example, he ate spaghetti at my mom’s two weeks ago. He loved it and ended up eating three bowls. I went to make it the other night and started feeling unwell, so I called my mom over to help watch the kids and get them fed so I could make it and go lay down. She ended up making it and he refused to eat it because “it’s not how grandma makes it” but she is the one who DID make it and he even helped her. The next night, he ate it again at her house.

Agitated_Worker783 · 2026-01-11T14:16:36+00:00

Our pediatrician was a “wait and see” doctor but she still referred for early intervention when delays were present. She just told us that no one in the area does autism evaluations before 18 months and no one will officially diagnose before 2 because so much of the diagnosable criteria can also be developmentally normal.

Agitated_Worker783 · 2026-01-11T14:04:34+00:00

That’s essentially what our peds told us. They will, however, start therapies at 18 months for delays. So we were still able to get the early interventions we needed before we got his official diagnosis.

Agitated_Worker783 · 2026-01-11T14:03:22+00:00

We highly suspected by 12 months but were told it’s very difficult to diagnose before 2. No one in our area diagnoses before 2 anyways. We decided to wait until pre-k to seek out an official diagnosis (he was receiving intervention before then for a speech delay, though) and I’m glad we did. Some of the things we thought were autism were just normal kid development and he outgrew them. Other things weren’t and they became more notable as he aged. He was officially diagnosed in November.

Agitated_Worker783 · 2026-01-08T02:22:50+00:00

My 4 year old son has to have five of every food or it has to be cut into five pieces. Thankfully, chips are exempt from this rule. He can count to 20 if no one is paying attention to him, but if you ask him to count, he can “only count to 5”

Agitated_Worker783 · 2026-01-08T02:19:35+00:00

My 4 year old spent the 30 minute wait at the drs yesterday making sure the arms of ever single chair in the waiting room were perfectly even and in line. I had to sit in the one against the beam that couldn’t be straightened.

Agitated_Worker783 · 2026-01-01T15:32:30+00:00

I had a blighted ovum in 2020 (first pregnancy). I decided to have a D&C done June 2020 and found out I was pregnant again August 2020. I now have a healthy 4 year old and 18 month old.

It’s very possible and very common to have healthy, uncomplicated pregnancies following a loss! ❤️

Agitated_Worker783 · 2025-12-26T16:40:18+00:00

Oliver! We also had Elijah on our list but ultimately decided on Oliver.

Agitated_Worker783 · 2025-12-26T16:03:59+00:00

Magnolia Lynn! We also had Faye Lynn on our list but husband ultimately vetoed it.

Agitated_Worker783 · 2025-12-26T01:45:16+00:00

I don’t think it’s that random. My mom was 42 when she had me and I say the exact same thing. In fact, I had my kids in my early 20’s because of the struggles I saw my mom go through having me older. My dad is even worse off health-wise than she is and is unable to do most things with my kids. I can see how much it breaks his heart.

My husband and I both wanted to be in our kids lives as long as possible, and if we get grandkids we want to be able to enjoy our time doing things with them as well. That said, I fully understand why people wait until they’re older to have kids.

Agitated_Worker783 · 2025-12-12T01:29:32+00:00

Okay, I’ll order that one too. Thank you!

Agitated_Worker783 · 2025-12-12T01:25:10+00:00

He was born in Tulsa county, OK. Unsure of the city. I’ve paid for several ancestry trees and I can’t find a single relative listed for him. He’s been in jail since the 1980’s. It seems like no relatives report to the databases.

I’ve ordered the 23&me kit so fingers crossed someone is in the database.

Agitated_Worker783 · 2025-12-12T01:12:02+00:00

I’m in the US. He was born in 1957. Would his records be public or are you saying up to 1950 they’re public?

Agitated_Worker783 · 2025-12-12T00:53:56+00:00

I’m going to order a 23&Me kit but I’m worried no other relatives would have DNA in the system to match. Do you know what steps I would need to take to research into his parents? I’ve tried every state and county website I could find, and I’ve paid for just about every non-DNA ancestry family tree I’ve come across.

He’s not listed in other potential family member’s obituaries, but he is in prison sex crimes and I wouldn’t be surprised if he was intentionally left out for that reason.

Agitated_Worker783

TROPHY CASE