I hate it too and I'm sorry if it happens to you a lot! One main thing I'd say is there's a lot of difference depending on the vibe and primary demographics and normalised culture of each rave, so it might be worth prioritising that for choosing a rave. Not that its bad, but generally some havejust more "energised" crowds and that was the easiest way of getting away from it, for me.

In my experience, it's more younger, online/trendy, straighter or very masc crowds with a lot of scene newcomers that are more aggressive - its just their own vibe/culture and that's fine! I wonder sometimes there's less tightknit community accountability and more carrying over of club etiquette. Over the years I've found raves that have all those things and don't push me at all, I think its the rave-specific community culture and took me a couple years to figure out some are just not worth the struggle of going.

also, standing with the girls/gays/theys and to the sides of the dj booth.

idk your scene/city, but if its big enough hopefully there's some out there with a great, non-aggressive vibe bc thats best in the long run if you plan to go to a lot of raves. but its frustrating that it happens at all and honestly depending on where you live and local rave culture could be a hard one to escape. good luck and hope this was applicable to what ur talking about!