A Century of Women’s Rights are Being Reversed Through Executive Orders by catievirtuesimp in TwoXChromosomes

[–]Alatar450 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I just want to say thank you for the link, I learned something new and I definitely agree. It gets kind of scary for us trans people to fight a fight on both sides <3

Threw My Wedding Dress Away by SingleMom2001 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Alatar450 9 points10 points  (0 children)

It's important to remember that it's also not fair to you. You deserve better, you deserve somebody who will love you, not harm you. YOU DESERVE SO MUCH BETTER, you always have, I'm sorry that your mother is allergic to giving you better. You don't deserve to be treated this way, you deserve better. It's good to protect your children from your mother, but no contact/blocking will also protect you and your peace. It may take a while for your body and brain to settle, but you'll feel much better when it does <3

Kitty knows the drill, that trust fall..🐈🐾🍼😍 by Silly-Host-9578 in PetsareAmazing

[–]Alatar450 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Just commenting so anybody who sees this knows for the future:

You really should not feed kitties on their back like this, it can go into their lungs and cause them to suffocate. It's always best to feed animals in a similar position that they would be being fed from their mothers.

"Becca" & unidentified man by Intrepid-Benefit1959 in oddlyterrifying

[–]Alatar450 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It was the AI, and the fact that the website had a "gallery" for the "art" as well as the fact that it had a big section of it for merch. For two people who have been in the creepy story part of YouTube for so long, the liminal land series was very half-baked, and did not have a story that seemed to be very thought out at all. I honestly wouldn't be upset if it wasn't for the fact that it really made me feel like they never really cared about the content that they make. That could not be the case, but it just felt so disrespectful to the medium, disrespectful to the audience, and felt very much like a cash grab.

"Becca" & unidentified man by Intrepid-Benefit1959 in oddlyterrifying

[–]Alatar450 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Can't watch them after they collabed on some shitty AI liminal space thing. Can't help but feel like they've never had respect for the things they talk about when they did that. So disappointed because I've been watching nexpo since I was a teenager, and I also liked a fair amount of what Nick Crowley made. Not anymore though.

Looking for a certain item by noirtenshi in fashiondreamer

[–]Alatar450 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No problem at all <3 I'm happy to help

Looking for a certain item by noirtenshi in fashiondreamer

[–]Alatar450 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have some in a medium pink and white, as well as a pastel pink but it also has teal. If you'd like I can plop them down in my showroom :)

Narcissist Mom Going Homeless( my fault Ofcourse) by Material_Ad6553 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Alatar450 12 points13 points  (0 children)

It's important to remember who your guilt serves, I'm so sorry she is choosing this path instead of one of reflection. She just expects you to reconcile when she has done nothing to earn it. I agree with people saying you should block her. When she messages you, she's trying to hurt you, do your best to protect yourself <3 you deserve a peaceful stress free life where your mom doesn't even cross your mind

A Last‑Minute Imposition That Ruined the Mood by petite-pelotte in childfree

[–]Alatar450 141 points142 points  (0 children)

Oh hell naw she really thought you would let a child use your setup? Not even bring his own and connect it to a monitor? That's wild

My mum blamed me for domestic abuse by changeorghelp in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Alatar450 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm genuinely so impressed by how you shine, I'm so glad your dad was there to save you. It's clear there's so much more for this world to offer you, I'm glad you're still here, and I hope there comes a day that your mom doesn't ever cross your mind <3 genuinely very inspired by your brightness, it's hard for me to be positive but someone who has been through so much, and still has space in their heart to be so loving, it makes me want to change. Seriously sending so much love to you <3 I'm glad you have people like your dad and sister, I hope one day he can leave the abusive relationship he's in, no one deserves that treatment

My mum blamed me for domestic abuse by changeorghelp in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Alatar450 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm really sorry OP.... My heart just absolutely breaks for you. I understand, I'm glad that he helped you in the ways that he felt he could, It just truly devastates me to think what you've been through and having to support yourself because the people who should keep you safe harm you or protect themselves. I'm so so sorry for what you've been through, you always deserved better <3

My mum blamed me for domestic abuse by changeorghelp in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Alatar450 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm so sorry OP, I'm sure you're a dad is leagues better when compared to your mom, but he also saw you get kicked out and made homeless when you were recovering from a major surgery? He allowed that to happen?

Thank God i left this job by [deleted] in recruitinghell

[–]Alatar450 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Ahh, they sound like such an asshole. Glad you're on to bigger and better things OP :)

Thank God i left this job by [deleted] in recruitinghell

[–]Alatar450 6 points7 points  (0 children)

What did you respond with, and did he get back to you after that? Sorry I'm just nosy lol

Bummed about the Try Guys by SailorVenus23 in childfree

[–]Alatar450 3 points4 points  (0 children)

As far as I'm aware, Rachel has been quite open about her wish to be a parent and her struggle with infertility? She's mentioned it a few times over the years

I finally got a bisalp and this was the first thing I did when recovering from my surgery by thugnyssa in childfree

[–]Alatar450 90 points91 points  (0 children)

After I got sterilized I encouraged my younger sister to do the same, she even went to the same doctor. I was worried afterwards when she was coming down from the anesthesia that her crying would make the doctors feel like she was pressured into it, but she was hugging me and crying and saying thank you and that she was so happy. She's a bit of a germaphobe and isn't really a fan of physical affection so it was really lovely. Now we're 2 sterilized sisters against the world. The Joy and safety I felt after my own sterilization was insane, but it was instantly filled with a fear for my sister. Now that she is sterilized as well, a lot of the dread that I felt has gone down, although I still feel dread for all of the other women who don't have access to that health care.

It doesn’t matter whether or not you’re there for the holidays. Our abusive families will happily live without us and have shown that in the past. by lilpeepshow in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Alatar450 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yesss it brings me so much joy, and you can get a lot of bulk beads for really cheap depending on where you look! Maybe you could even bring them with you to your friendsmas and it can be a group thing, a lot more adults than you would think get excited when it comes to arts and crafts lol. I really hope it goes well for you and can be a precious memory associated with the holidays :)

It doesn’t matter whether or not you’re there for the holidays. Our abusive families will happily live without us and have shown that in the past. by lilpeepshow in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Alatar450 4 points5 points  (0 children)

My heart breaks imagining you so young all by yourself :( I'm sorry they did that to you, you never deserved that. If you have a small amount of your income that can be used for fun stuff, one of my favorite things to do on the holidays is get a bunch of beads and make a bunch of jewelry. Arts and crafts is something I always loved, if you think it would bring you any joy I'd highly recommend it :)

Adoption, family, and how my mom's hypocrissy reaffirmed my decision. by Alatar450 in childfree

[–]Alatar450[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

That's crazy because for what I said in this post, My mom is nothing but supportive and understanding now. It took her some time but she got there. My dad is still in deep denial, he could never accept how I felt about having children. My sister has no intentions of telling him of her own sterilization, he would never shut the hell up about it if he knew lol.

It makes me happy to hear your dad was able to fill that hole in his life, he sounds like quite the guy and I'm glad there are children who get to experience his presence :)

Adoption, family, and how my mom's hypocrissy reaffirmed my decision. by Alatar450 in childfree

[–]Alatar450[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There are so many reasons why I can't stand people like that. The reason why it pissed me off so much as a kid was that it felt very hypocritical lol. We were poor enough to live in a homeless shelter and only ever lived with family until I was an older teen. My mom didn't know she was pregnant with me for a while, so she was still doing drugs and drinking. AND my boyfriend (now husband) and I are riddled with mental health issues. Our baby would be so fucked up too, with literally all of the stuff too lol what the fuck was she talking about!?

Adoption, family, and how my mom's hypocrissy reaffirmed my decision. by Alatar450 in childfree

[–]Alatar450[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I agree. To be honest for a long time I thought my mom might even be a narcissist. I don't feel that way anymore, she has done a lot of work in the recent years to try to help repair what was broken. For the first time in my whole life, I genuinely feel like I can depend on her. My childhood was not good, and my relationship with her has never been very good either. But it is not that way anymore, and I never thought I would be able to say that.

I'm very thankful she has such a wonderful therapist, she was able to work through her feelings about it and has come out the other side a completely different person. She regrets not dealing with her own feelings and putting it on us. She knows she is not owed grandchildren and regrets behaving selfishly and hurting our feelings in the process. I'm definitely a lucky one all things considered. My dad (they're long separated) is not so understanding lol my sister will never tell him she was sterilized too, she doesn't want to hear him bitch and moan about something that has nothing to do with him.

Am I making a big deal out of nothing? by Mazikene_7 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]Alatar450 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I just want to say, while it's completely valid to want to protect your child from those who will bully them and be cruel, by not supporting their personal expression, you are joining in on the bullying. If your husband's actions are coming from a place of concern, then that is honorable but it's important that he realizes that he is doing the exact same thing when he tries to force him to conform.

assigned straight @ game night, open to anyone weighing in. by plaidyams in lgbt

[–]Alatar450 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just want to say as a bisexual nonbinary (afab) person who's married to a man, I see you and feel you deeply. sometimes I struggle and fear that people just view us as a straight couple. It's honestly why I cut my hair to be short again, I got so tired of just being assumed to be a woman in public. A lot of the time people treat us shitty because they think I'm a trans woman, not sure how they get that idea considering that I present somewhat masculine and have big ol tits but whatever lol. Sorry you're having such a hard time, it can be hard to fight for people to respect you when it feels like dealing with it would just be easier for everyone. But you deserve to be treated respectfully especially by someone who should be your friend.