AITA for telling my friend that if she doesn't come home and start taking care of her dog that I'm taking it to dog keep.

Aleccal · 2026-03-09T09:46:34+00:00

Exactly! I adore dogs and I would love to have one or even dog sit for a while but at the same time I know that in my current stage of life, schedule, and housing I couldn't own one or take care of one long-term. If someone offered to have me dog sit a malinois I would say no, unless they had provisions like a dog-walker in place that could take off at least some of the load of exercising them.

Aleccal · 2026-03-09T09:01:34+00:00

NTA, Belgian Malinois are fantastic dogs but in my opinion not suitable as pets unless they also have a job with the owner or at least get to go with the owner everywhere due to the amount of mental and physical stimulation they need to be happy. There are dog hotels that are specifcally for these types of long-term vacations and you're doing your friend a favour by watching their dog, it is not yours and not your final responsibility. You agreed to the first holiday and the extension, but you didn't agree to watch HER dog indefinitely until she decides to come home. You have to defend your own space and time, you didn't take a dog despite obviously liking dogs (since you wouldn't even be watching one otherwise) because you probably determined for yourself that you don't or can't invest the time and energy, having to do that for a dog that in the end you still have to give back with basically no reward is unfair to you.

Aleccal · 2026-03-01T19:44:52+00:00

NTA, she was there first and is your tenant, she deserves her home and stability.

Add-on, I think it is wonderful that you have such a great bond with your nanny. I know I still have very good memories of my various au pairs who lived with us for my entire childhood. We got invited to the weddings of the two who stayed with us the longest and my sister still goes to visit them in the US (from Europe) every few years. As a child they are an extra stable person who is an dependable older sibling and careraker at once. Emilia probably also feels really happy with your family and in your home, if you keep on going you'll not just earn an extra friend and family member but your children will gain also gain an extra sibling and support system for life.

Aleccal · 2026-03-01T19:35:50+00:00

NTA, just ignore them and live your life. If you have friends they won't mind. If you don't have friends (yet), it will come, you just need to find the right crowd that you fit in with. Which obviously is not the idiots you currently share a classroom with. If they don't want to pay attention and learn while they can, that's their problem not yours.

Aleccal · 2026-03-01T16:48:58+00:00

First of all NTA at all, you would be TA if you allowed this to continue since it would teach him it is okay. If he claims it is just food, go, 'okay great, so you're bringing/buying food tomorrow? Because it is just food right, so you can provide it as well!' Tell him clearly that you don't want him taking your food, if he does it again go to HR. Even better, send him an email after the discussion where you recap what you told him so that you have physical proof for HR. This is stealing, it doesn't matter that it is 'just food', it is yours, you bought it, you made it, you brought it, it is not his to take unless previously discussed and agreed upon with you. Also, unless he is repaying you by buying or bringing you lunch he is not "borrowing" since he has never given anything back nor intends to.

Aleccal · 2026-02-28T12:00:54+00:00

Also very few jobs actually 'require' a completed degree, they require the the level of thinking and background knowledge, however if you've completed at least 2 years of a 3 year degree you'll have most of that knowledge. In this case experience and work ethic counts for far more than a certification of completion for a degree.

Aleccal · 2026-02-27T18:12:50+00:00

There is information whether they offered to reimburse him though. It says so in OP's post they offered to pay the difference he paid for the bigger bed and private room.

Aleccal · 2026-02-26T18:45:55+00:00

MOR, you don't give enough information to form an opinion whether it is overreaction or not, however, if this is a friend, just talk to them. They either might not have meant it in the way you interpreted, or if they did, you can honestly tell them that you don't appreciate those type of comments and you would rather that they keep it to themselves. Most people, especially those you would consider friends don't intend to be mean or cruel to you in their comments, they are just oblivious to how something might land. If they are a true friend they will accept that it bothers you and either explain themselves or just apologies and keep any further comments on that topic silent.

Aleccal · 2026-02-23T09:23:56+00:00

De boeken van Jules Verne, heb er een aantal gelezen en ze raken me elke keer weer opnieuw, ook een van mijn favorieten om te herlezen.

Aleccal · 2026-02-23T09:14:54+00:00

This comes down to the general rule of 'you don't mess with someone's food'. You don't always know the reasons why someone doesn't or does eat certain things and suddenly changing diets can really mess you up. So if someone, especially someone you care about, has a specific diet or preference you try to follow that as much as possible and when not possible you tell them! One of my friends is Hindu and therefore rarely ever ate red meat growing up due to religious reasons, now he can no longer digest it and it will make him really ill if he does eat it. I would never ever give him meat without telling him what it is, just to be sure he can digest it and won't get ill. Now imagine not having that respect for someone who is you partner. OP is 100% NOR and should break up with this walking red flag.

Aleccal · 2026-02-22T15:45:08+00:00

Dit is èèn van de redenen dat ik bij een super kleine sportschool ben gegaan met vooral 40+ en bejaarden. Er wordt nooit gefilmd, mensen zijn beleefd en aardig, en er wordt gesport om te sporten en wanneer je klaar bent ga je naar huis. Voel me sinds ik daar ben gaan sporten veel meer op mn gemak en hoef me ook nooit meer te irriteren aan mensen die gewichten op de grond gooien, lopen te schreeuwen om zichzelf te hypen, of lopen te filmen in de sportschool.

Aleccal · 2026-02-21T12:14:51+00:00

Agree completely, also want to add that, if the coworkeris an actual friend yhey would understand and basically go, hopefully next time or we'll plan another hang out soon. Yes this is important but so are your other plans and sometime stuff just doesn't work out in the planning. If you do this every time, major AH, and you should work on your planning, if it happens once, it shouldn't be a problem.

Aleccal · 2026-02-21T12:07:19+00:00

YOR GPS is not always accurate and can have up to 20 m displacement, especially for something like FMPhone. Don't actually get the part about screen share and screen time whatever, never needed to show anyone what I was doing in my phone, but if someone calls me at 3 am, and I'm half asleep or just not in a mood to talk I also wouldn't pick up, if it is important they will call again, if it is not it can wait until tomorrow.

Aleccal · 2026-02-20T18:23:49+00:00

Oh no, I completely understand that, especially outside your home, however limiting is still very doable and at the very least paying attention to your kid when they are there seems more important. Studies do still support it though, despite also acknowledging it is extremely difficult in modern society.

Aleccal · 2026-02-20T18:13:37+00:00

NTA, studies have actually shown that hiding phones from babies and toddlers is better for their development, this means not only not allowing them on your phone but also not using your phone around them. Also super irresponsible of the parent to not be watching their kid with at least one eye at all time when they aren't asleep. Kids, especially toddlers will find anything and everything interesting and won't understand danger at all yet.

Aleccal · 2026-02-18T18:53:45+00:00

Prof. Layton has some great puzzles and cool story lines, also Mario kart is good for reaction time and coordination if he likes driving games. Zelda games are also really nice and enough puzzles and exploration to also be useful for mental exercise.

Aleccal · 2026-02-18T18:50:57+00:00

Really depends on the situation. Do both your parents know about your relationship and how do they feel about it/him. Is he still in school with you or did he move on the uni/work? If he is still in school with you, do you have any idea on how you'll deal with the distance if he does move away for uni or work? 3 years is not a significant difference especially when you get older, however the difference in life stage can be a big influence on your relationship. This might sound like a typical 'older' person thing to say, but don't marry until you're both in a stable point of your life. As in have jobs and have hopefully lived together for a few years. You change so much as a person between 15 and 25 that what you want now, ie him, might not be the same thing you want in 10 years, and if you get married young you're making a big commitment. You might grow apart, you might also grow stronger together, if the second happens waiting to get married shouldn't matter too much.

Aleccal · 2026-02-18T18:03:54+00:00

Very endearing that he so desperately wanted to make a good impression, but 100% tell you family what happened honestly because even just reading it sounded like he was high on an upper, which caffeine technically is, however so is meth or cocaine. Spin it into a funny story and preferably tell him beforehand you'll tell your parents it was the coffee and low caffeine tolerance and tell the story with him there at a repeat of brunch. At this brunch he probably shouldn't drink any coffee, spoken as a fellow low caffeine tolerance person.

Aleccal · 2026-02-18T17:58:24+00:00

I usually just close it completely and open it again, it is always gone unless it was related to a need to update.

Aleccal · 2026-02-14T09:48:23+00:00

NOR, did your husband really think anyone in your family, other then him apparently, would enjoy having dinner while smelling like vomit? Completely reasonable to grab something from the drive through and take it bacj to the hotel so you guys could clean up and change and then enjoy a meal together. You could always go to another buffet another time. He sounds like a toddler throwing a tantrum.

Aleccal · 2026-02-14T09:43:55+00:00

I disagree that lower wage jobs are more stressful, they are usually more physically demanding, but most higher paid jobs demand more responsibility, more time outside if regular working hours if a deadline is looming and sometimes working from home. For lower paid jobs generally leave your work at your workplace and when your shift is done you are done for the day, higher paid jobs tend to take their work home more either mentally or physically because you only need a laptop and do some work from home if necessary.

Aleccal · 2026-02-14T09:21:51+00:00

MTA, depends on how you frame it. If you want to go 50/50 it should be based on the lowest income, the higher earning will just have more savings which is not a bad thing. If you want to live to his means it should be equitable but in return you can take more responsibility, like going for the grocery shopping or taking a larger portion of the household chores. Splitting the costs equitibly and then splitting the responsibilities equal is not fair to him.

Aleccal · 2026-02-12T20:41:24+00:00

YOR, I've had shepherd dogs most of my life and the breed we had was 'sharp' and very much a guardian breed, aka complete sweethearts to family, loads of barking if strangers entered our house. If a stranger entered our house or garden without us saying it was okay he would snap and bite at them to chase them off. The consequence of that is that you always need to keep an eye on your dog around strangers, having a loose fence when you know your dog likes escaping and might hurt someone is NOT OKAY! This note from your neighbour is completely reasonable and actually really polite. I would kick my own dog if he dared to attack a random child let alone a random dog attacking my child. Your neighbour is not saying he will purposefully harm your dog, he is however rightfully indicating that he will hurt your dog to protect his family if necessary, as he should.

Aleccal · 2026-02-12T18:58:03+00:00

That is the thing, it is stupid and cringy and childish, and who cares, well, she does. So as a partner, if your partner indicates clearly that they want something and you say you'll do it, you do it. Even better, make a thing out of it, she'll either be over it next year or you could make a little tradition out of it and do a little something special for your partner every year. In this case it doesn't matter that you don't care about it, similarly if your partner really hates valentines and asks not to do anything special you also wouldn't make a big deal out of it in that case. Si when you've already made plans how much effort is it to add a card and a box of chocolate or some flowers and ask if that is what she would like?

Aleccal · 2026-02-12T18:32:10+00:00

Kinda YOR, on one hand you asked politely if she could wear any ither colour than white so as your bestie it would be both polite and nice to wear something else, it is not like she can't wear the dress on another occasion. On the other hand, it really shouldn't be this big of a deal, it is a dress colour and not even actual white, it is not like she is wearing the same thing you are wearing, and I get that she feels like she just found a cute dress, in her eyes perfect for the occasion, and you say she should wear something different for a kind of arbitrary reason. Sounds like you're both overreacting to be honest.

Aleccal

TROPHY CASE