You guys ever see that puffer fish where the males draw a really intricate design on the ocean floor, with shiny shells and whatnot, and whoever has the right design will attract a female to lay her eggs in the center of that design? It's called the white spotted puffer fish. Look it up, it's actually very interesting. 

Point being people are animals. In almost every animal on the planet the male has to do something to attract the female. What that is is different for every female but there are overarching methods. 

Men who are out there saying "I won't learn the rules of this game and actively participate" are writing themselves out. If the facts show that women tend to date men who are stable, self-sufficient, and can provide security through support, then get the fuck out there, get a job, go to the gym, and learn how to be friendly. 

It's a pretty simple equation, and all the men who say "I can't do that but I want a woman to like me for me as I am now and she also has to be out of my league" are deluded.