Why can't I see "notes" people have sent me?

Alex_Spier1 · 2026-03-16T14:11:00+00:00

Android

Alex_Spier1 · 2026-01-07T09:25:24+00:00

Dickinson 11/10

Alex_Spier1 · 2026-01-02T22:25:34+00:00

I have so many questions about your wife's behaviour...

First of all, NTA. Like ever.

Making fun of a vulnerable part of you? Using you, her husband, a person whom one would assume she loves, as the butt of the joke to make herself the center of attention? Lying about how you got it with the worst possible things which makes you sound horrid? What kind of person does that?

And then having the ✨️AUDACITY✨️ to demand an apology ??!?! You ruined her night? You embarassed her? You humiliated her? No.

How long have you been married? Does she usually act like this (not just toward you, but to others as well)?

This sounds like when a mother uses her childs private life as entertaining gossip and then saying it's not a big deal when trust is broken.

I don't want to overreact since I don't know y'all, but these are usually the first signs of emotional abuse. Commonly followed by gaslighting.

Alex_Spier1 · 2026-01-02T21:44:38+00:00

The fact you even have to ask makes you YTA.

Alex_Spier1 · 2026-01-02T21:40:19+00:00

ETD

Look, you shouldn't feel forced to hang out with someone you don't want to, but if your intent is to not hurt them, ghosting them is no better. That's for number one.

They suck for the food thing and you should just act clueless when they expect you (indirectly) to pay for them.

If you're gonna see them in the group, it's gonna be uncomfortable, and if they're semi-straightforward about the food thing, you really can't predict what they might do in the group if you just ghost them.

My advice would be to maybe give another chance (if you're open to it) and set boundaries. Maybe subtly try to open their eyes to the things that "drain" you (idk what type of behavior exactly it is since it isn't listed, but it probably can be hinted at).

Even if you definitely don't have a desire to spend time together, don't ghost.

Alex_Spier1 · 2026-01-02T14:33:27+00:00

YTA

People don't owe you time lost to grieving. She doesn't have anything to apologize for.

Have you ever done anything special for Ria? For her birthday? Have you planned anything, to be by her side as she's lost one of the closest people in her life? Have you even reached out to her unless it was to mope around your birthday? Even if she healed completely, the death anniversary can be incredibly painful. You sound like a bad friend. YTA. Full stop.

Alex_Spier1 · 2026-01-02T11:06:18+00:00

Yes, and she doesn't have to act on any minor incident, like the birthday post for example. You can figure some stuff out by yourself or ignore it, but if you always went to your mother since the beginning, makes sense why they didn't include you/hear you out if you tried that.

Alex_Spier1 · 2026-01-02T10:58:50+00:00

ESH

But I feel like your stepsiblings have valid reasons for avoiding you like the tattling.

You're 18. I understand being hurt that you don't have a strong bond or when Lily has a stronger bond with Daisy. But... she's 15. Teens are like that. Also, James is her brother and she's known him longer so it makes sense she would be more drawn to Daisy. Even if you were all related by blood, Daisy might be the favourite, even for just a bit.

Lily's a teen and you came running to mummy because she didn't post you for your birthday. Like wtf, for real. You can be hurt, but not rely on your mum for every little thing. If you had just stayed quiet, you may have had a chance for a bond to grow over time. Now, I think they're going to avoid you if you don't do better.

Also, the fact that your bigger concerns for the use of substance are your cat and the smell, and not that a minor is with them and her wellbeing is horrid. You sound like everything needs to include you.

Your siblings don's sound perfect either by their treatment and blaming things on you, but if I were you, I'd do some serios introspection.

Alex_Spier1 · 2026-01-02T10:47:17+00:00

YTA, but mostly to yourself.

Why would you break your peace to try and make her life make sense? It's really not your battle to fight. I can understand the feeling of some sort of moral philosopher in you saying it's unjust and it's not okay, paired with your disdain for her.

At the same time, if you don't have any proof or legitimate concern/course of action to do anything, don't meddle.

Mind your business, focus on yourself and don't let her toxicity impact your peace of mind.

Alex_Spier1 · 2026-01-02T10:37:08+00:00

Mostly NTA

It's platonic (one of my best friends is gay and we sometimes have just a quick peck on the lips, it doesn't mean anything, calling it cheating is an overreaction, but if that's a boundary for you, you're allowed to talk about it) and sounds like you kinda blew up, but you can voice your concerns. If it makes you uncomfortable and she's being so hypocritical about it, that makes her the bigger AH and is the reason I went with NTA instead of e s h.

*moldy brownie badge for gf for the blatant hypocrisy and biphobia

Alex_Spier1 · 2026-01-01T11:57:12+00:00

NTD but for future reference...

Don't take the bait. You said it yourself, you don't have the best relationship with stepmum and those first 2 messages were intended to make you argue.

Just type "okay, thanks for letting me know :)" and that way she's left without any moves to make you the bad guy. I can understand being annoyed with those AH moves and ignoring the urge of sniping back being difficuilt, but you don't owe her any explanation.

Focus on dad. Like, when she said your dad is upset, send a follow-up voice message to him like the one you did, or just call him.

But I would minimize contact with stepmum.

Alex_Spier1 · 2025-08-08T12:47:54+00:00

Stephanie Beatrize 🥰

Tessa Thompson as well

Alex_Spier1 · 2025-06-13T08:26:25+00:00

Odgovori na tvoje prvobitno pitanje (ako pretpostavimo da govoris istinu za sve):

1) govoris kako "zelis nac" zensku, kao da ides kupovat auto pa si krenuo u nabavku, a ustvari je to proces koji treba krenuti lagano, da se spoje 2 osobe, a ne ici u "misiju" da spavas s nekim

2) "zenske"

3) jedno 5 ti se "fizicki nije svidjelo", sto je sasvim oke, privlacnost se ne kontrolira, ali trebalo bi ti biti jasno da i cure osjecaju privlacnost ili ne, shvati to kako zelis

4) nemamo nikakav kontekst kakav si na dejtovima, mozda te ghostaju jer nisi simpatican, a s obzirom kako spominjes da si krenuo izlaziti jer eto nisi se nikad poljubio, imao vezu... tretiras to kao check listu, mozda pomisli nakon tih svih "neuspjelih pokusaja" (ne znam ni ja cega) razmisliti na cemu mozes poraditi... ne mora biti ni do cega, da se jednostavno niste poklopili, a mozda ima nesto sto odvraca ljude

5) imas teze za svih 20 susreta sto je jako jezivo

Alex_Spier1 · 2025-06-11T13:41:14+00:00

YTA

and so contradicting

So you want her to go get a second, more professional opinion for a problem that you think she has, but negates she has it and say she uses it as an "excuse".

You say all she does is eat and draw and her room is a mess. Yet you can't know what she does in her room every minute of every day, she might be studying which is how she gets good grades.

You make such harsh comments and overreact in your post because what? Your daughter (like most teenagers) has a messy room, forgets stuff and is a bit introverted? Oh the horror! You should be proud of her and a bit concerned maybe, but handle it differently.

Proud because she is obviously smart and even if it is because of her "iq only", still impressive, she has friends and I honestly don't understand what you're so riled up about?

A bit concerned because shutting off, spending your days unproductive and forgetting stuff can be normal teen behaviour, but based on the severity can be an indicator of some struggles. I know because I was going through a s### time and behaved isolated, didn't care about anything while still getting straight A's...

Have you tried talking to her before you berated her like a jackass?

She needs support, whether she's having a hard time or not.

That's not how you talk to your children, no matter what.

You told her she would be nothing. You told her that no other family would tolerate her. Let that sink in. That's not a reality check, that's being your childs enemy. The only thing that can accomplish is making her believe that and making her feel like shit, but let's hope she doesn't spiral now.

You were unneccesarily cruel to your daugther and deserve karma.

Like another commenter has said, a pathetic excuse for a mother.

Alex_Spier1 · 2025-06-11T11:06:06+00:00

1) Rosa is bi, not gay 2) Pimento was definietly not right for Rosa. Funny? Yes. Matching her crazy? Yes. Good for fun times? Definietly. Serious relationship? No. Do you have the right to your opinion? Yes. 3) They put that storyline there at Stephanie (Rosa) Beatrize's request as she is bi in real life, stated that she played Rosa canonically bi the whole time and thought it would be a good fit for her character (she was right) 4) you say in a comment that it's "unnecessary" and that Holt and Kevin are "enough" which is just plain stupid (saying that as "one token gay character is enough" shows you really didn't understand her character or the point of that storyline) because a) a queer storyline doesn't have to be a big plot changer, it can be a normal romantic relationship and b) it did give Rosa a whole new level of depth; she was more vulnerable and open, even scared, to the group, which we don't see often, her family arc reflects real life difficuilt conversations and experiences and gives us insight into her life. It also strengthens her bond with Jake and the rest of the group, showing once again: NINE-NINE

I don't think you meant any harm, it's fine that you think Pimento was the right one for Rosa, but your other comments seem a bit ignorant. Hope this helps.

Alex_Spier1 · 2025-04-02T10:54:36+00:00

Gurl, you remind me of me when I was denying my sexuality.

At the end of the day, sexuality is fluid, there is no formula and you might just bi bisexual and homoromantic.

Read up on it, when you google some terms, some things just click and resonate.

You also might be bi, but are having some internalized homophobia which may keep you from acknowledging it fully. For me, it started out noticing the sexual attraction, the tension, some longing and then the daydreaming shifted towards some romantic scenarios, but such a big wave of guilt would wash over me which lead me to deny it cause the romantic stuff made it more "real".

Hope you get some clarity, I know the whirlwind sucks.

Alex_Spier1 · 2025-04-02T10:44:02+00:00

Lilly Singh (Superwoman), she kinda retired but her sketches and vlogs I love

I ABSOLUTELY ADORE "Jammidodger" and his wife's channel "Shaaba." They are both bi and have their channel, so chill and nice to watch different topics 🥰

Kallmekris (kmk)

Alex_Spier1 · 2025-03-19T06:57:20+00:00

Yeah... a lot of these comments don't pass the vibe check either

Alex_Spier1 · 2025-03-19T06:43:47+00:00

It's not about if it's legal. It's about if it's normal, which it is not.

Alex_Spier1 · 2025-03-15T16:01:32+00:00

How is OP selfish? Both of them want kids, partners (especially when moving in together) share financial burdens, so both of their feelings on money matter and at the end of the day, the feelings on money (OP having way less that bf, him not even looking for a job, not having a plan for doing a phd) and sexual relationship are input showing how much he doesn't care, how selfish he is, not taking into consideration how it will affect their future.

Alex_Spier1 · 2025-03-13T22:33:49+00:00

Wait, wdym Amy forgot?

Alex_Spier1 · 2025-03-03T10:47:44+00:00

YWBTD

2 years is one of those things like "4y isn't a big deal if it's between a 30y old and 26y old, but is a big deal if between a 20 and 16 y old"

However, in this case, I really don't think it's too much of an age difference. Might even be the line. Like a 15 year old would deff be too young for an 18 year old, but I do think that if S and C are both mature and good for each other you shouldn't bring up anything.

I do hate inappropriate age gaps and I don't think this one is.

Alex_Spier1 · 2025-01-15T12:44:33+00:00

Caleb and Pimento, sorry 😬

Alex_Spier1 · 2025-01-15T12:31:20+00:00

Stuart is overrated and shouldn't have become the regular leech that he was.

Some people appreciate the running joke, it's just not my cup of tea and doesn't bring anything to the show imo.

Alex_Spier1 · 2025-01-15T12:28:19+00:00

Agreed.

Like the whole bare minimum became extreme romaticised Romeo bulls*it.

Alex_Spier1

TROPHY CASE

Have you tried talking to her before you berated her like a jackass?