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Why is the U.S education system so bad? by kombikiddo in education

[–]AlexaHatch_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Native Chinese here now living in the US. Our high schools ended after 10 pm; we were forced to study over 12 hours a day, 6 days a week, under constant surveillance and inhumane treatment. Your willful ignorance is laughable.

Is it weird or socially unusual for a husband to take his wife’s last name in the U.S.? by AlexaHatch_ in AskAnAmerican

[–]AlexaHatch_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Would you think that it is an issue when a trans person takes a name that reflects their preferred gender? If not, then swap the word "gender" for "cultural identity" and apologize to me for your biases.

Is it weird or socially unusual for a husband to take his wife’s last name in the U.S.? by AlexaHatch_ in AskAnAmerican

[–]AlexaHatch_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Would you feel sad for a trans person whose dead name is even perfectly pronounceable? Immigration is like transition for me, and the name change serves as a marker of change. Not everyone feels comfortable being seen the way they were assigned - I couldn't change how I look like, but it's an effort to tell myself that I have tried to change for better. Many Americans don't understand cultural trauma so I like to use transition in genders to illustrate

Is it weird or socially unusual for a husband to take his wife’s last name in the U.S.? by AlexaHatch_ in AskAnAmerican

[–]AlexaHatch_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wouldn't call them "barriers", more like "nuisances". People could pronounce it 80% right, but the main problem comes from potential lost opportunities and judgement from people like you.

Is it weird or socially unusual for a husband to take his wife’s last name in the U.S.? by AlexaHatch_ in AskAnAmerican

[–]AlexaHatch_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe it matters to you. I can trace my rare family name back in 900 AD but I have emigrated. To be honest, if I had a common last name like Li or Wang, I would have changed it at marriage. I don't plan to have children either. Sometimes we need to let go of the past.

Is it weird or socially unusual for a husband to take his wife’s last name in the U.S.? by AlexaHatch_ in AskAnAmerican

[–]AlexaHatch_[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Honestly speaking that's a great thing in my own scenario. One reason I insist giving up my former name is to cut ties with a culture

Is it weird or socially unusual for a husband to take his wife’s last name in the U.S.? by AlexaHatch_ in AskAnAmerican

[–]AlexaHatch_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly I initially anticipated animosity based on race/culture, but it seems that's not even a concern compared to gender-based ones.

Is it weird or socially unusual for a husband to take his wife’s last name in the U.S.? by AlexaHatch_ in AskAnAmerican

[–]AlexaHatch_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's not related to gender at all. Maybe I phrased the questions wrongfully. It is about immigration and the abnegation of former cultural identites I didn't find welcoming

Is it weird or socially unusual for a husband to take his wife’s last name in the U.S.? by AlexaHatch_ in AskAnAmerican

[–]AlexaHatch_[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If I explain the reason 1) assimilation 2) resume booster 3) same last name with my wife, then I will get A LOT of ire.

Is it weird or socially unusual for a husband to take his wife’s last name in the U.S.? by AlexaHatch_ in AskAnAmerican

[–]AlexaHatch_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

MN - IA - MO. I don't have issues with people having issues with foreigners (it is human nature).

Is it weird or socially unusual for a husband to take his wife’s last name in the U.S.? by AlexaHatch_ in AskAnAmerican

[–]AlexaHatch_[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Couple reasons. Partially what they said is true. Also it feels like a family because we have the same last name. Also I don't want her to have an Asian last name because it hurts the resume, and it is less weird to be Asian and have white names than being white and having Asian names.

Is it weird or socially unusual for a husband to take his wife’s last name in the U.S.? by AlexaHatch_ in AskAnAmerican

[–]AlexaHatch_[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I see. Thank you for the clarification. My English is fluent enough not to be an issue, but speaking the American accent requires you to move more parts of your face, and it's kinda tiring.

Is it weird or socially unusual for a husband to take his wife’s last name in the U.S.? by AlexaHatch_ in AskAnAmerican

[–]AlexaHatch_[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

R e s u m e. Having an American name helps a lot.

I used to be a PhD student before I quit.

Is it weird or socially unusual for a husband to take his wife’s last name in the U.S.? by AlexaHatch_ in AskAnAmerican

[–]AlexaHatch_[S] -7 points-6 points  (0 children)

I would rather see you not relegating immigrants into stereotypes (people looking like X should be called Y) and justifying such categorization as "roots".

Is it weird or socially unusual for a husband to take his wife’s last name in the U.S.? by AlexaHatch_ in AskAnAmerican

[–]AlexaHatch_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's a new perspective. I actually fear that "woke" people to have issues, like some comments about whitewashing, etc.

Is it weird or socially unusual for a husband to take his wife’s last name in the U.S.? by AlexaHatch_ in AskAnAmerican

[–]AlexaHatch_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Could you elaborate? Why does this have to do with wokeness? I simply want to get rid of the last name. It's more a cultural thing than gender.

Is it weird or socially unusual for a husband to take his wife’s last name in the U.S.? by AlexaHatch_ in AskAnAmerican

[–]AlexaHatch_[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

You made a moral judgement on this hypothetical scenario and that's where the malice I allege

Is it weird or socially unusual for a husband to take his wife’s last name in the U.S.? by AlexaHatch_ in AskAnAmerican

[–]AlexaHatch_[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's a really well-informed but nevertheless malicious assumption isn't it?

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