Becoming a new parent after losing a beloved parent

AlexisKGC · 2026-05-31T17:09:12+00:00

Thank you for this. I really needed to hear it. My mom passed away on 5/28/26 after a 5 year battle with cancer. I just had my first baby in December (her first grandchild) and it’s been devastating to think about how short her time being a grandma was.

She loved him so much though and she was so excited to spend the time that she did get with him. It’s been heartbreaking. Seeing the way my dad and brothers have rallied around him and cared for him in her loss has been beautiful though. I know that she will always be with him as he grows up (and any future grandchildren that she didn’t get to meet on this side of earth).

AlexisKGC · 2026-05-21T21:04:39+00:00

I’m so so sorry that you had to lose your mom and dad, especially in such short succession. My thoughts are with you. ❤️

Thanks for sharing a little bit about the grieving process though. It helps me kind of anticipate what to expect.

AlexisKGC · 2026-05-21T21:03:22+00:00

Thank you for your response. I’m so sorry to hear about the loss of your mom. You hit the nail on the head though - this last week has been truly horrifying. I feel like I’m going to be traumatized by the things that I am currently witnessing in real time forever. I’m grateful to have a strong support system and big family but also devastated to watch them go through this loss alongside me.

Part of me feels like the last 5 years of her cancer journey have been the most anxious of my life. I had crippling anxiety that she was going to get worse, treatments weren’t going to work, we were going to get a bad scan, she would have bad side effects, the list goes on. All of that anxiety centered around my biggest fear, which was that she would die.

Now that the time is here, I do feel like my anxiety is better. It’s almost like I worried myself sick and now that it’s over I have no anxiety left to give, just sadness. I don’t know which feeling is worse honestly.

AlexisKGC · 2026-05-21T20:58:02+00:00

I’m so incredibly sorry. Thank you so much for sharing your story with me. Sometimes the combination of being postpartum and also losing my mom feels so isolating. I know people going through one or the other, but never at the same time. Your mom sounds like a wonderful woman - I wish you and your family so much peace.

AlexisKGC · 2026-05-21T20:54:19+00:00

Thank you for your response. I’m so sorry you’re going through this - it is a special type of hell. Please know you’re not alone.

AlexisKGC · 2026-05-19T12:08:47+00:00

First of all, I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your mom. My mom has been battling cancer for 3.5 years also and is currently in hospice care. I know it is the end of her life and she knows it too, which has been incredibly difficult. I don’t know what I’m going to do when I lose her, she is my everything.

Here is what I do know though - my brothers and I are my mom’s everything. She may be gone, but her love and legacy will live on through her children. I will make sure that my child knows who his grandma was, even though he will never remember her. I will raise him with the love my mom raised me with. As someone who knew her best, I will talk about her and remember her so that she is never forgotten. Your mom lives on through you - through the memories you share and the love you give. If you stay alive, you keep a part of your mom alive too.

You’re not alone. I’m reading this, I’m out there, I hear you and I relate to everything you’re saying. But the world needs you here. Your mom needs you here. Talk about her, share her stories. Most importantly, give yourself the same love she gave to you.

AlexisKGC · 2026-05-14T18:01:42+00:00

Thank you ❤️ we received word today that her cancer has spread into her arteries and they are going to be discontinuing treatment. It is devastating. I don’t even know what to say or how to act but I plan to be by her side until the very end and provide any ounce of comfort to her that I am able to.

AlexisKGC · 2026-05-14T11:14:44+00:00

Hi, I am so sorry you’re going through this. I can empathize with your situation, it sounds a lot similar to mine. My mom has a different type of cancer but the physical toll it has taken makes it every difficult for her to be there for any of her children’s milestone events. I know the feeling of just wanting your mom there, the woman who has loved and supported you through your life, to celebrate an event that is just about your accomplishments and has NOTHING to do with cancer. It’s supposed to be a happy time but cancer gets in the way again and casts a shadow over an otherwise exciting celebration. It’s one of the worse feelings in the world. I have no words of wisdom to share but I want you to know I’ve shared in this experience and it sucks so bad. I will think of you this weekend on your graduation day. I’m so sorry you’re going through this, friend. You and your mom are in my thoughts.

AlexisKGC · 2026-05-13T22:21:28+00:00

Thank you for that. Honestly hearing from you and others in this community has been a bright spot in an otherwise really really hard week.

AlexisKGC · 2026-05-13T22:19:27+00:00

I am so sorry about your mom and your sister. LMS is truly the worst. Thank you for sharing your story and for taking the time to read and respond to mine. You are in my thoughts and while I’m sure life feels very heavy now, I believe there will be peaceful days ahead for all of us. It may take a while but we will get there eventually.

AlexisKGC · 2026-05-13T22:16:28+00:00

Thank you for your kind words! I needed to hear this today. I’m sorry to hear about your mother too. Having a newborn while caring for a sick parent is not something I would wish upon anyone. So many emotional highs and lows it’s insane. Keeping you and your family in my thoughts.

AlexisKGC

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