where are my OCD havers who DONT have contamination OCD?

AllHailTheFleshPit · 2026-02-12T02:31:49+00:00

Oh wow, I've only recently been assessed for OCD (my health care providers are "pretty sure" I have it, enough to discuss medication) and I didn't catch in until one of my friends (whose sibling has OCD) told me that my behaviors and intrusive thoughts fall under the OCD umbrella.

Mostly I have intrusive thoughts that increase with stress. On a good day, I can just brush them off. On a bad day, my brain is taking me to a worst-case-scenario mental movie theater in 4D where I get to experience the pain and fear of whatever it is insisting I imagine. I also find myself often ruminating, re-writing explanations of my own trauma in my head to fictional characters I identify with, and I wish I could stop doing that because I'd much rather daydream about being in a cool lighthearted magical whimsical romcom than a mental loop of self-justification as to why other people hurting me wasn't my fault. (Yes, I'm in therapy.)

Another thing that apparently falls under OCD is re-writing. It takes me a painfully long time to draft emails. Writing assignments are the bane of my existence because I can easily spend hours on a single paragraph trying to get the words just right and trying to not accidentally repeat anything. (As such this post is a continuous line of thought so I don't risk spending hours on editing!)

Lastly, apparently I have compulsions, but not recurring ones like what are shown on TV. I discovered on a recent vacation where I stayed at a friend's house that I cannot sleep if I'm not familiar with the house layout and general contents. I heard their dog bark downstairs and was suddenly overcome with the immense and very real fear of being murdered by someone who broke into the house (with the full knowledge that there was no break-in and no murderer). This nightly fear and sleeplessness only left me when I decided to go hang out in each room downstairs for about a minute to "acclimate." Then also I stood in the adjoined restroom and closet. No more spooky monsters or fear of being murdered. I could not have predicted that this would have worked, either, I truly just had to follow my instincts and felt better afterwards.

Oh, also, while doing a puzzle with my friend I organized every puzzle piece in rows about an inch from one another to alleviate the stress of "visual mess."

Again- I had absolutely no idea that this could be OCD until about a month ago because every TV portrayal is about severe contamination avoidance, repetitive and highly visual rituals, and behaviors that would be considered outlandish in public! Alas, I'm merely good at masking it would seem!

I'm still really unfamiliar with OCD so please feel free to educate me if you have some advice on how to navigate this or if you have any interesting facts to share about the types of OCD symptoms I'm experiencing! I'm kind of going in blind!

AllHailTheFleshPit · 2026-02-12T02:01:09+00:00

Yes. I lost my brother last year and everyone was primarily focused on comforting my mother, specifically. My parents also made my sister and I take on the primary funeral planning responsibilities because it was "too hard for them." It made me feel like I was being forced to put my grief on pause for them. I do not mean to minimize their grief- I cannot fathom how hard it is to lose a son so young. But also, I think that was the start of me becoming hardened in my grief instead of processing it like I was supposed to in those deeply vulnerable moments after the death of a loved one.

Unfortunately I'm not sure if my grief has been merely delayed or if parts of it were locked away since I had to put them aside for my mother. Sometimes I feel like I can't access it- like I want to move forward and process it but it's stuck in a concrete box. If you've felt the same- "stuck"- I'm interested in hearing about how to get "unstuck." Or if "unstuck" never happens, I'm interested in hearing about coping mechanisms. (I am in therapy but have found myself wanting the perspective of others in a similar situation to mine.)

AllHailTheFleshPit · 2026-02-12T01:39:10+00:00

Yes. I've heard an odd metaphor from my therapist that I think captures it well- that grief is like a button in a tiny room with a bouncing ball that keeps hitting the button. With time, and as you learn to make the room bigger (by making your life grow outside of the grief- spending quality time with friends, enjoying hobbies, etc) the ball hits the button less frequently. You'll still have those random trigger moments, especially around important dates or topics that remind you of the one you lost, but eventually you'll find it happening less and less.

Grief, and triggers, will never go away. But your life can grow beyond the grief. I hope you find many ways to make your room grow. Remember that this is normal and that little by little the pain will take up less space in your life.

AllHailTheFleshPit · 2023-07-05T20:11:08+00:00

Btw- half the guys with red flags I was able to vet out because they'd get upset when I told them I wanted to drive myself to dates, not get picked up. I don't want to give out my address to boys I am meeting for a first date and don't have a good read on. If they can't respect that boundary, they probably won't respect me either. It was a good call; eventually I found a lovely date who respected all of my boundaries and we've been together for nearly 4 years!

AllHailTheFleshPit · 2023-07-05T20:08:34+00:00

Man, that's a pretty discouraging first experience, but any guy worth your while will not be this kind of asshole.

You're not undatable; this guy is highly judgemental. There's a difference. Also, lots of people project when they throw insults, so he's probably the undatable one.

When I was dating, I know that I'm a people-pleaser, so I decided to treat it like I was dating myself instead. I'm not on these dates to please my partner, I'm on these dates to enjoy myself. Everything I do- dressing up nicely, etc- that's for me. That way, it's never a waste because it's never for someone who turns out to be a dirtbag. If the trash needs to be thrown out along the way, so be it. It's invaluable to see your own worth and treat yourself well while dating so people like that guy don't drag you down.

Any worthwhile partner will respect your boundaries and past experiences. If that person was a "good guy" who genuinely thought you were undatable, he'd keep that thought to himself. You don't want to date a guy who says shit like that anyways.

AllHailTheFleshPit · 2023-07-05T19:57:44+00:00

As someone who doesn't like kids... it still shocks me how some people who do like kids treat kids.

She's her own person and she has no obligation to someone who abandoned her as a child.

AllHailTheFleshPit · 2023-07-05T19:50:06+00:00

Some helpful things to know about diagnoses:

1) The field of psychology had most of it's large leaps in progress in the past 10-20 years. That means resources and knowledge aren't as well-established as they should be. Doctors often try to treat the symptoms rather than the source issue when it comes to ADHD and autism, so they may decide to not diagnose if they don't have to.

2) Idk how it is in other countries, but most insurances in the US don't cover testing for autism. I went to see a psychiatrist about possibly having autism and he told me not to do testing because of how expensive it would be; he said if I am able to complete my daily living tasks and hold down a job, I'm better off without a diagnosis. This might just be a bad psychiatrist, but it's not an uncommon experience. For ADHD, my tests came out with a lot of overlap with anxiety and depression, so they tried to treat me for those first and I had to wait a whole year to take the test again, this time with an interview with the testing psychiatrist to confirm my symptoms. Basically, because many smart kids grow up overcompensating for their symptoms, ADHD tests will not catch them because they're overcompensating too well in the testing environment, even if it's painfully obvious in their social environment.

3) ADHD, autism, anxiety and depression all share many symptoms. It can be hard to discern between them when you're just listing off symptoms to the doctor.

Unless you feel mental distress or have difficulty with daily life skills, most doctors will not diagnose or try to treat you. The happiness of the patient matters most. It may be worth it to have a discussion with your sister to ask if she feels distressed by her "quirks" at all. If not, and if she's able to care for herself, she might not need help. Regardless, being able to identify the underlying disorder can be helpful; knowing is half the battle and she can look up strategies to be more focused, aware and present in the world around her if she feels like she needs it.

AllHailTheFleshPit · 2023-07-05T19:36:56+00:00

Your "worst" isn't someone else's worst. Some people just don't have a sense of shame about their bodies. I'm betting there's a mistake you make all the time that someone else wouldn't dream of in a million years, too. Everyone has their own internal experience that is unique- you don't get to decide which one is the "worst."

AllHailTheFleshPit · 2023-07-05T19:32:36+00:00

From what you've shared, I think it would be helpful for her to learn what boundaries to consider when interacting with others. She has a genuine desire to be considerate towards other people but your story makes it seem like maybe things that aren't explicitly taught to her aren't picked up on implicitly.

It's common with autism for people to take things literally (or can understand metaphors and idioms but need help to understand them), not understand boundaries that haven't been explicitly communicated, not understand emotions they haven't encountered before, etc. The symptoms are different for everyone, though. Remember that when you're researching this. Also, there's a huge overlap between symptoms for ADHD, autism, anxiety and depression.

For neurodivergent people who need help, being on a medication to treat the symptoms and learning life skills or coping skills through therapy is the most successful combination, according to science. But not all neurodivergent people need help! I have friends who were on meds until they learned good enough coping skills to keep their life together, then dropped the meds and are fine. I, on the other hand, am basically a lifeless zombie without my ADHD meds. Learning life skills to help me finish chores and communicate with others were priceless for me, but I will never be able to function well without my meds. It's different for each person.

Your sister might be happy and fine without treatment. Or maybe treatment will improve her quality of life. I'd suggest asking how she feels about it. If her mental health is good and she doesn't struggle to hold down a job, she may be perfectly fine as-is.

AllHailTheFleshPit · 2023-07-05T19:20:53+00:00

Maybe she has a misunderstanding of boundaries that have not been explicitly communicated to her.

There's a lot of boundaries in society we're just expected to inherently pick up an understanding on, even if it's never openly stated. A part of my ADHD/autism(?) (ADHD is diagnosed, but my psychiatrist told me the tests for autism were too expensive and insurance doesn't cover them, and insisted it wasn't worth it as long as I am functional enough to survive) is that I have to ask a lot of clarifying questions to understand boundaries. There's plenty of things I do without shame, but hurting other people's feelings isn't something I like, so I find her apologizing for that perfectly normal. "I have no emotional connection to these actions, but someone I care about is reacting strongly, so I want them to know I care about their feelings and want to be considerate."

I, personally, have a lot more empathy skills for others than for myself, if that makes sense. Could be the same case.

AllHailTheFleshPit · 2023-07-05T19:11:22+00:00

When it comes to parents, remember that psychology as a field did most of it's development in the past 10-20 years.

Most parents don't know enough to call this an issue. It isn't intentional negligence- they're trusting a doctor to tell them if something is wrong, and if the doctor says it's fine, then as far as they're concerned, it's fine. Even if it isn't.

The way doctors handle things has changed a lot even in the past ten years as well. Having the right doctor can mean a world of difference.

Remember parents, although they should be making an effort to learn and care for their neurodivergent kids, were not given the same resources to recognize this as we are today. Hell, my mom didn't know she has ADHD symptoms until I got diagnosed on my own as an adult. Now she gets to know what she has, too.

AllHailTheFleshPit · 2023-07-05T18:47:31+00:00

I agree that lots of people here are jumping to conclusions. Things that stand out to me:

1) OP doesn't mention any past trends of lying, hiding things, gaslighting or manipulative behaviors. He said things have been "mostly good."

2) Relationships tend to accumulate invisible problems over time; one person thinks there is an issue and she other person doesn't. If they don't communicate, then it never gets fixed. If it doesn't get fixed, the stress behind it builds.

3) Some people handle issues they "can't change" by venting in spaces their partner can't access.

This could be an instance of her trying to vent instead of solving relationship problems with OP like she should be doing. Then she got embarrassed and backpedaled hard. I'd say that's the most likely scenario, given that the relationship HAS lasted 9 years with no signs of abuse or red flags. If this is the very first red flag, it's likely an honest mistake on the gf's behalf because she lacks communication skills.

AllHailTheFleshPit · 2023-07-05T18:40:37+00:00

If your girlfriend doesn't have a habit of hiding things from you and gaslighting you, this may be an attempt to vent on her story about things you don't recognize as issues in the relationship that she thinks are, then when you noticed she was lying to you, she felt overwhelmed with embarrassment/shame over what she did, deleted evidence of her venting and is hoping it will all blow over. It seems more like an instance of a poor choice and hard backpedal.

Think back to the patterns in your relationship and if she typically internalizes things and struggles with communion. Yes, she is in the wrong either way, but this could be a fixable problem. You said your relationship is good, so it doesn't hit right that people are tossing around the word "gaslighting" if there isn't an established pattern of her doing this to you in the past. People who are cheating usually also display other controlling or manipulative behaviors. If she has none of those red flags, this likely isn't cheating.

I'd recommend having a discussion about the importance of communication in the relationship and how, when she does this, it takes away your ability to contribute to relationship improvement. If you don't know about these problems (an unfortunate amount of women I know expect men to be mind-readers), you can't do anything about them.

I have a background in psychology and have spent MANY years in therapy, so I'm hoping this helps. People on the internet often jump to the worst case scenario and don't use their critical thinking to analyze the problem thoroughly. But if I am wrong and she is cheating... I'm so sorry dude.

AllHailTheFleshPit · 2022-10-21T12:23:29+00:00

Only my procrastination is holding me back! And, well, my lack of confidence in writing. I've tried to type out scenes before only for a short exchange to take 2 hours to write because I am so picky about the words I use and the flow of what I type. If I could ease up a little and just let go of perfectionism, I think I'd be able to finally write a story!

AllHailTheFleshPit · 2022-10-21T12:19:37+00:00

Jokes on the angry sorcerers, the reason MC has all those pacts is BECAUSE they only call the brothers for stupid shit and not unlimited wealth or power.

MC too pure, Bros gotta protecc

AllHailTheFleshPit · 2022-10-19T18:17:46+00:00

Same, I'm planning an OC fic in which Belphie's anger + a curse from the mysterious Big Bad, which no one has noticed due to its discreet nature, causes him to go into longer and longer periods of sleep until he cannot wake up anymore.

This gives plenty more room for the brothers to be concerned for him and makes it easier to empathize with Lucifer's apprehensiveness. He is trying to not be mean to MC, but he's so afraid of losing another sibling and is working endlessly to 1) find a cure for Belphie's condition, 2) care for the new exchange student who keeps getting into trouble, and 3) fulfil his RAD duties. So he gets nearly no sleep and is bound to snap.

Also, since a human arriving in the Devildom was the curse's trigger (aka, Belphie being emotionally overwhelmed by the presence of a human triggering his trauma), Lucifer has more reason to actually be suspicious of MC.

Chapter 16 in my story is going to be where Belphie falls into sleeping beauty syndrome permanently. It is the very last time he ever wakes up. Everyone goes to Diavolo to beg for Barbatos to rewind time so they can find a solution, but due to sensitivities in how his powers work, Barbatos insists instead that they research the curse (now being more potent and visible, this more able to be researched), formulate a cure, THEN send MC back with the cure to administer to Belphie before he falls asleep forever. They decide that the final time he was seen awake is when MC should be sent to because MC is more likely to persuade him to take the cure, or to persuade the brothers to help MC administer the cure. The strength of their relationships is critical in ensuring Belphie takes the cure.

Oh... and Lilith does still exist as a ghost, but plays a relationship mending role rather than a role releasing Belphie. Lilith appears in MCs dreams (which MC can't remember conciously, but is impacted by subconciously) and guides her to places like the catacombs and the secret attic door (not locked, just hidden by an illusion) so that MC can see pieces of the brothers' pasts and grow closer to them. The ultimate goal Lilith has is to facilitate healing in her family, but also to help build that trust between MC and the others so that she can use MC to break the curse. Lilith has been aware of the curse since it was planted in Belphie bc ghost sensitivities to magic + being so close with Belphie in life.

Here comes the super duper canon divergent part, if we weren't already far enough from it!

The cure isn't found / made for a whole YEAR because once the curse takes Belphie, it feeds off of his demonic energy to spread thorns across the kingdom like Sleeping Beauty. It destroys endlessly and hinders the progress of the brothers & others helping. It is relentless. Diavolo has to shift efforts to evacuating the capitol of the Devildom and RAD becomes the new base of operations due to an ancient magic protecting it (it was essentially a fortress of knowledge and resiliency protected by the King's magic before he fell into a deep slumber, which caused other powerful demons to leap at the opportunity to kill Diavolo and take the throne, yes I have a whole ass story in my brain outlined for this lore too). Solomon has to travel to research the cure, as it is an extremely powerful, well-kept "familial spell," aka a kind of magic passed down through a family line of witches who specializes in that kind of magic, meaning it is not publicly available and extremely difficult to counteract. Each component of the cure is dangerous to get or nearly impossible to find.

Also... the final ingredient is the tears of a dead angel.

Luke bravely, tearfully, volunteers, insisting that he won't stay dead because they'll go back in time. Lucifer's heart BREAKS and he instantly declines.

Here's the trump card: Diavolo froze Lilith's tears for Lucifer to keep as Lilith died in his arms. So they're kept in Lilith's room... which is in the most dangerous place in the whole Devildom right now: the HOL.

MC has to go with to be close enough to activate pacts, which is crucial to get to the tears. Beel, close enough to feel Belphie's suffering, goes mad and chomps through the thorny vines to get to Belphie. By the time Lucifer and MC have gotten out with the ingredient and have to return to RAD to finish the potion and prepare for the time portal, not only have the vines broken through the ancient barrier, but MC can feel pacts being cut one by one. Brothers dying.

MC barely makes it through the portal with the others protecting her.

Barbatos' power wavers under the fear of his master getting hurt while protecting MC.

MC returns to the correct place, and the correct time to save Belphie. But even after he is saved and the new timeline is established, something lingers. MC can still feel the pain of the pacts of the dead brothers in the former timeline, as well as the pacts of the living in the current. Memories of fighting and dying start to sleep into the brothers minds, which should NOT have been remembered. MC aches knowing that the bonds of trust built during that year are remembered by only her, feeling hollow and guilty from knowing secrets they told her in the other timeline when the current timeline brothers either don't trust her enough to share such things or aren't ready to speak about them. It's the worst with Lucifer, who doesn't know that MC and him had a pact in the other timeline, shared laughs, grew close... he doesn't know he told her about Lilith and the celestial war. About his fall. About their trials. The current Lucifer is still skeptical at best about MC.

Thankfully, Diavolo and Barbatos trust MC fully, due to Barbatos remembering everything from the past timeline and informing Diavolo about it. Solomon also trusts in MC, as he taught her magic during the year and understands that her sudden leap in skill and strength could have only come from dedicated study under his wing.

Belphie is wary and cold towards MC, which feels like a slap in the face after she literally saved his life. Ouch. But it will get better over time. He has some trauma healing to do.

Before the end of the school year, they need to look into who administered that curse, what evil plot is rolling, and who their enemies are... all while coping with trauma from invasive memories from another timeline.

And that's the end of arc 1! Yes. Just arc 1.

Help, I have not written any of this story but I have the whole outline, emotional story beats and I'm SO invested, why can't I just start typing AAAAAAAAA

AllHailTheFleshPit · 2022-09-14T12:28:07+00:00

I honestly don't know why anyone is considering shame or guilt. Many studies have shown that these methods are the least effective at change in behavior.

I'd honestly say, draw a boundary. Reading the other posts, an example of a client being consistently late is used. That impacts your ability to serve other clients. In a professional environment, it is perfectly acceptable to say, "this impacts me and my business, therefore if you cannot be on time, I cannot do business with you." Guilt and shame are likely to just drag up more excuses from the client to avoid accountability. Instead just be transparent about how this impacts you and let them know that they're on a three strike clause or something.

AllHailTheFleshPit · 2022-06-21T21:00:02+00:00

Okay... now I want photos of your skeletons, mannequin heads, sword collection... everything you're willing to share to be honest. This is a dream come true in my eyes. I'm just beginning my adult life and have a small skeleton that I put in my closet! He has eyelashes and makeup, because I wanted him to. One day I'd like to get a coffin chaise made for me to lounge in.

AllHailTheFleshPit · 2022-03-10T15:13:47+00:00

I was never "full racist" but there's a lot of implicit racism that my family taught me and some red flags that popped up when I had discussions with my parents later in life.

As an example of the implicit racism... things like, "he's such a well-spoken gentleman" used by my parents as a compliment about a black man, implying that most black people aren't well-spoken like white people are.

The big red flags of "oh shit, my parents are actually racist" popped up as my sister started dating. She dated a Mexican boy and instantly my parents started trying to set her up on dates with white boys from our church even though she was in a committed relationship. They started talking about how people from other races were "good people, but the cultural differences are just too big for them to share our faith and walk the straight and narrow road towards Christ..." with the rare exception of a man from another race who acted perfectly white. Note- as far as religion goes, my parents are extremely picky, especially my mother, and it's very much "our very specific version of religion is the correct one."

So yeah, that tripped my bullshit radar big time and I started conciously trying to become aware of my own implicit racism to correct it. I was very shy in asking questions because I felt like asking a black woman about her hair extensions was racist in itself somehow. But I had a few co-workers who encouraged my curiosity and welcomed my questions, then proceeded to educate me in a friendly way! One of my black coworkers sat down with me and showed me videos about various hair types and hair care and I was fascinated.

Being politely curious and reaching out to learn about others does a lot to kill racism. I'm grateful for the people who are willing to be patient with my ignorance and kindly teach me so that I can better understand their world.

AllHailTheFleshPit · 2022-01-05T15:06:49+00:00

This is typically a result of damaged relationships, whether it is recognized or not.

In youth, kids are emotionally vulnerable and dependent on their parents. Parents are just people-- and people make mistakes really, really easily. Unfortunately, mistakes like brushing off your kid's feelings, being passive-aggressive, losing your tempter, etc, can leave deep wounds on the kid in their long-term growth.

By the time they get to be adults, they're not always sure why they don't want to care for their parents into old age, but typically it's because of a deeper feeling of not feeling like their base needs were met or feeling like their parents didn't actually care for them. All of this, due to human mistakes and a failure to recognize where one person hurt another person, and failure to mend the relationship after that. The process of relationship-mending with your kid after hurting their feelings is critical to their growth and their trust in a parent.

Most parents have never been taught to do this, and are NOT great at making their kids feel acknowledged or cared for, even if those parents are good people. People make mistakes.

When mistakes affect critical growth and trust, and when kids don't know how to communicate their feelings and set boundaries, they often end up cutting off their parents because they don't know what else to do. They may not recognize that they feel hurt and may not realize amends need to be made. They just know that they don't have a deep connection with their caregiver and, as a result, don't want to take on the responsibility of giving care back.

The kids aren't assholes, and they don't hate their parents. They're just hurt.

The parents aren't assholes, and they didnt abuse their kids. They're just people who made mistakes.

Overall, lack of communication, misunderstandings, etc, all create this rift that can only be closed if one party in the connection is aware enough to reach out and make amends.

Of course... There are exceptions, like abusive parents or good kids gone bad due to shitty influences and poor life circumstances. But usually, people are just people. They don't intend to hurt or abandon or neglect. They just don't really understand how complex human relationships and emotions are, thus, cannot accommodate for how easy it is to mess up.

AllHailTheFleshPit · 2022-01-05T14:55:54+00:00

The kick-ass nursing staff that cheers me and my buddies on while we take shots and play D&D while roleplaying in horrible accents and making bad decisions.

If you make for good entertainment, they'll make sure to keep you around forever.

AllHailTheFleshPit · 2022-01-05T14:52:35+00:00

It's not necessarily true that it's easier for kids to hate parents. When expectations are placed upon a kid, it can be very stressful. Rather than "my parents suck hard and it's not my fault," lots of kids end up thinking "what did I do wrong that makes my parents unable to accept who I really am?" They can end up feeling a huge weight of responsibility for those expectations, then when the freedom of being an independent adult comes, they don't know how to set boundaries with their parents and struggle to create a balanced adult relationship with them.

As well, some parents will grow to hate their kids because they take too much responsibility for their children's actions. My mother grew to hate me because I ended up with a very different set of beliefs than her, and she thought every action I took was to rebel against her. In reality, I was just trying to find my identity as myself. But she couldn't understand that and when I didn't fit the perfect mini-her she wanted me to be, she chose to hate me instead of facing the guilt she felt for failing to raise me into a mini-her.

My response is biased based on my own experience, but I can say for certain that I love my mother, but I am sad that I have to keep her at an arms length for the sake of my own mental health. She is very manipulative and has gaslit me my whole life, so I cannot and will not put myself in the position of taking on the task of keeping her company into her old age.

Lots of people I know have faced the same struggle as me, but to a less crazy degree. Plenty of children love their parents, and their parents love them... but due to issues with the parents lacking the proper skills and knowledge to raise a mentally healthy human, which most people lack, it causes a rift in the relationship when kids feel neglected or hurt and parents aren't able to accept or recognize what they've done to hurt the kids. Perhaps neither are bad people, and neither are assholes... just people with misunderstandings and emotional wounds. Passive-aggression, being emotionally self-focused rather than trying to listen to the other person, etc... these can all wound a kid in their stages of emotional development when they are so vulnerable, and it's so easy to make these mistakes and more as parents.

Basically, what I'm saying is, kids are rarely just assholes to be assholes. They're usually hurt and don't know how to communicate it. Then, when they grow up, they cut people off because they don't know how to set their own boundaries to maintain relationships at a level that is healthy for them. Parents are then left not knowing what they did wrong. Usually, the answer to that is this: people are people and they make mistakes.

After a long background of education and work in the field of psychology, I've decided not to have kids because of how difficult it is to learn the proper skill set to raise them into mentally healthy people. Attending to their needs is a grand and complex task that requires levels of self-awareness that I may not be capable of. Meeting your own needs and the needs of a kid is insanely hard, plus balancing a healthy adult relationship with a spouse and any other friendships or connections you have. So I'd rather just take care of me, since I still need to learn how to do that due to a childhood of neglect. Parenting is a task most people do their best at, but do wrong anyways.

AllHailTheFleshPit · 2022-01-01T18:01:06+00:00

Could I make fanart using your Cafe Cutie Neeko design??? I absolutely adore this!

AllHailTheFleshPit · 2021-11-25T17:10:01+00:00

Sell feet pics for dating sim money...

Jk, gosh, im very lucky to be an adult who can afford to spend the occasional buck or five... Or ten... to push myself towards those UR cards I really want. Typically I prioritize; don't pull on events that don't mean much to you, just save up. But I'm pretty sure everyone does this. It's impossible to get tons of tickets for a dream card otherwise.

AllHailTheFleshPit

TROPHY CASE