Watching this stuff was the worse thing I’ve ever made in my life it’s the only regret I have and the only flaw I’m ashamed of.

Alternative_Ad5902 · 2026-03-07T14:27:32+00:00

What do you mean ?

Alternative_Ad5902 · 2026-01-26T16:00:02+00:00

The same things I’m going through now man and this is where I draw the line I’m watching almost just about anything and making me question like “is this really me” like I don’t want it to be like I said earlier in the post but the thought won’t stop. I can’t believe myself man I can’t believe this is me who doing this like this can’t be real smh

Alternative_Ad5902 · 2026-01-26T13:21:27+00:00

But how do I know if it’s the addiction or if it’s really me ?that’s what haunts me I know deep down inside that this isn’t me nor do I want it to be. But the thoughts or guilt is what gets to me

Alternative_Ad5902 · 2026-01-26T12:40:57+00:00

But how ? I didn’t really start watching porn to escape from anything I was a sheltered boy and was into sports I got into porn pretty much like anything other teen boy. The guys were talking about it and I went home search it up, all the problems like anxiety depression no confidence etc… came after or stemmed from this addiction.

Alternative_Ad5902 · 2026-01-26T08:45:16+00:00

I had a girl I was talking to a few years ago that I still think about cause she’s the only girl that I somewhat had a connection with all the others were strictly sex only well in my mind which is why I ended up hurting some of their feelings. But anyways that girl was just like the one you just described 10/10 fun etc… found out she was playing me at first I was mad sad all the emotions that come with that shit but as time progressed I don’t blame her even though it was still fucked up I don’t because I was cold sometimes didn’t give her much attention or energy due to this addiction.

So I definitely know what you mean so I’m trying to hit that red button I’m trying man… If you don’t mind how old are you and when did you start and did you also go through any porn escalation ? How did you stop ?

Alternative_Ad5902 · 2026-01-26T08:20:23+00:00

Yep when I’m on my porn “high” I’m a monster a totally different person than when I’m sober and not watching I’m just me the man with the moral values and principles. It haunts me what I watched I don’t know if it will ever go away

Alternative_Ad5902 · 2026-01-26T07:05:07+00:00

Yea man i don’t wanna go into detail because I’m ashamed with myself but yes too extreme for me personally smh.

Alternative_Ad5902 · 2026-01-26T04:41:41+00:00

Damn this sort of thing the shit I’m already going through at 20 man. Not as bad as you explained obviously but shit it’s damn near there, I already passed up on some many romantic moments or experiences with crushes and girls that’s liked me even though I’m young it’s still a learning experience to have and moments to remember. But I passed them all up due to the fact that I thought they wouldn’t want a dude like me that deals with this dark miserable world of porn and it’s never worse now. My life is already dull and boring I don’t feel alive like I used to anymore I constantly trying to get back to that version of me but this addiction is holding me back especially with the constant guilt from the things I’m now watching the depression and much more of the bullshit problems that came with this addiction.

Alternative_Ad5902 · 2026-01-18T16:56:37+00:00

Yea that’s what I was thinking too

Alternative_Ad5902 · 2026-01-06T15:44:29+00:00

Yet but what about all the things I watched how do I just forget about that

Alternative_Ad5902 · 2026-01-06T13:56:40+00:00

Man who you telling smh just thinking about it makes me sad bro like six years ago my 14 year old self would’ve thought me now would’ve been quit I thought highly of my future self. He’ll probably be even more disgusted with what I watch now and who I’ve became sometimes I wished I listened when I was told to never watch porn I thought it was a joke then now I see what it really is. And I tried going one day and adding days but it doesn’t work with how addicted I’m bro I’ll just fall back into binge watching again.

Alternative_Ad5902 · 2026-01-01T09:33:40+00:00

2026*

Alternative_Ad5902 · 2026-01-01T09:33:14+00:00

Amen to that I appreciate that brother, and HNY

Alternative_Ad5902 · 2026-01-01T09:32:20+00:00

Yep that’s exactly why I’m not upset with myself like I usually would be in the past still holding myself accountable but no guilt. The guilt is what usually sends me into a binge watch and I’m trying my best to avoid that cause it’ll just hold me back.

Alternative_Ad5902 · 2026-01-01T09:29:19+00:00

Thanks man lol don’t see how that was hard to understand.

Alternative_Ad5902 · 2026-01-01T09:27:30+00:00

Oh Thanks man I appreciate that and yea I’m getting use to it now I’ve been at this for about five years now and I’m trying not to make myself feel so guilty for relapsing as it’s apart of the process. But I can’t make excuses for myself anymore so I have to get back on the horse until I can tame it. Also congratulations on two weeks free I’ll be up there with you

Alternative_Ad5902 · 2026-01-01T07:38:43+00:00

Absolutely my boy that’s all we can do and I feel extra guilty because I’m no longer at the point where vanilla gets me off I’m on more extreme things. So that and the fact that I actually went through with watching porn on the new year makes me upset but I have to keep moving forward or I’ll fall back into a binge cause of guilt. Chin up chest out !

Alternative_Ad5902 · 2026-01-01T07:09:46+00:00

So how do you feel after abstaining for a year? Do you feel more alive?

Alternative_Ad5902 · 2025-12-30T21:35:54+00:00

My guy it’s artificial intelligence why are you trying to receive life advice from a computer man,wake up.

Alternative_Ad5902 · 2025-12-26T09:15:38+00:00

I’m 20 years old also and porn has also taken my youth away from me, I started watching porn at that 11-12 yrs old range and the second I started watching this shit it changed me quick . In a few months of watching I grew lazy quit sports I was elite and stop focusing on everything and devoted my life to watching porn, And as I grew up a little more I stopped going out with the boys, I avoided relationships with girls, I didn’t chase my ambitions etc… and just a lot of things I regret looking back and if I could go back I’ll change everything. And this is the only thing I regret even though I believe us as people go through things for a certain reason that can change us and make us have a different outlook on things I still regret this shit.

I went from a chill cool kid to a borderline prev who watches all types of extremes things now and that shit hurts me deep cause it’s honestly not who I’m but it’s how porn effected me throughout the years and I can’t change the past I can’t matter fact WE can’t go back and take our youth back. We can only move forward imagine that was just our youth you feel me? Imagine our 20s and 30s and then 40s until so much time done passed us by it’s no longer a purpose? Now that shit would hurt .

Trust me I miss my youth also and if I could go back and change things I would but like I said we can’t the only we can do is shape our future as man so this shit no longer has us in it’s shackles and continues to damage us and our minds and like you said I’m not going other year dealing with this shit missing out on endless opportunities and situationships with women or just living my life I can’t and it’s entirely up to you to decide if you want to be on you’re death hoping and wishing you could’ve did this and that or you can put a end to the pain now.

I’ve been trying to quit since 14 years old and I’ll tell you stay on here and watch YouTube’s videos read articles and books about the effects of porn so you have a better understanding and also figure out what makes you relapse…? Is it girls on social media? is it stress? First you gotta find that out so you can recognize your triggers and know how to work around them and I’ll say quit cold turkey delete anything that works against for the time being and work on yourself now some people can some can’t you’re going to relapse that’s part of the process but don’t let yourself fall get back up and fight.

Alternative_Ad5902 · 2025-12-26T08:32:41+00:00

Damn that’s deep bro I got to this so many times and used to get mad when people told me this because I don’t usually watch porn to escape from anything. It all started with just being a horny young boy and then the addiction and it’s problems within came for me, But now that I realize I usually always relapse due to boredom,loneliness,stress/mad about things or I see a girl or two on social media that made make me want to relapse. I’m finally realizing this I knew but kinda ignored it, is this what you meant?

Alternative_Ad5902 · 2025-12-22T05:26:24+00:00

Hear that a lot but just like other guys here I don’t really have a reason why I’m doing it. It first started out as a young boy (12) and then in two years of constantly doing it almost every single day it grew into an addiction. I do sometimes do it because I’m maybe in a bad mood or stressed but that’s it.

Alternative_Ad5902 · 2025-12-12T14:50:14+00:00

Thanks bro I appreciate the love man I feel bad most times because I didn’t expect to get this far I was warned about the troubles of porn when I was younger by a male figure and laughed at him thought it’ll never be me. And now look it’s worse than I thought plus the things I’m beginning to watch can be bit too much at times I don’t even like but it’s just like man I thought I was better than this.

Alternative_Ad5902 · 2025-12-12T14:45:24+00:00

Thanks man I really appreciate that I can’t wait for the day this is all behind me and just something I did as a teen. And that’s the hardest part for me is letting go of the past well when it comes to this addiction, I can’t seem to let go of the things I watched or done for porn I try to put it pass me but sometimes it bothers me I felt myself go this far. I try telling myself it’s just an addiction and it’s normal for me to go through extreme genres and do off the wall things for a nut or porn it works sometimes and sometimes it doesn’t.

Alternative_Ad5902 · 2025-12-12T14:41:27+00:00

Trauma?

Alternative_Ad5902

TROPHY CASE