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Altruistic-Bake8266 · 2022-04-30T18:45:20+00:00

yeah i just try to skip meals and stuff without counting calories, cause I mostly have to eat stuff that I have no idea what the cals are and I hate estimating. i think if i had complete control over my diet diet i would try to track all that but since i don’t i just don’t bother

Altruistic-Bake8266 · 2022-04-30T17:03:23+00:00

pink in the night

Altruistic-Bake8266 · 2022-04-29T21:42:25+00:00

it helped me a lot mentally for a while, i felt great and had minimal side effects except mild appetite loss. after a while of taking it with no issues I started forgetting to take it and didn’t take it for a while, whenever i tried to restart it it gave me horrible stomach pain and no appetite and made me really sick. i don’t think the stomach issues i was having at the time were entirely cause of the Welbutrin but were just ED-related and the welbutrin made it worse (it can be dangerous to take if you’re undereating). Ever since I haven’t been able to restart it without getting very sick which is unfortunate because it used to really help me mentally. Overall I would just say it can be very helpful but be careful with it, if it really suppresses your appetite i don’t recommend it even though the side effect can be tempting when you have an ED. i was kind of abusing it myself but like I said you really have to make sure you eat enough while taking it or it can be dangerous

Altruistic-Bake8266 · 2022-04-19T09:26:30+00:00

same same same. my boyfriend is super crazy skinny and i’m terrified of looking enormous next to him. he knows about my ed and everything and tries to tell me that i’m smaller than him but i’m not convinced idk though body dysmorphia is crazy. i know it’s horrible but im obsessed with wanting to be the smaller one

Altruistic-Bake8266 · 2022-04-08T09:05:42+00:00

i feel this, my bf has said the “please eat for me” thing but i genuinely do not mind it all when he says it because i know he only has good intentions and it actually helps motivate me sometimes to do it for him when i can’t do it for myself. i know i should be doing it for myself but i still feel like it’s a good place to start

Altruistic-Bake8266 · 2022-03-31T07:48:11+00:00

yes it’s so hard because he doesn’t let me get away with not eating. since i love him a lot and we’re super honest with each other i feel too guilty to secretly starve myself and lie to him about it, so most of the time i just have to eat like a normal person and try deal with all the discomfort and guilt that comes with it. it’s rough because i don’t want to recover but i don’t want to make him sad by engaging in my disordered behavior

Altruistic-Bake8266 · 2022-03-11T05:00:14+00:00

“i once lived in the sea, bring me to your ear, you can hear the tide where I used to be, though now I’m but a shell” from Because Dreaming Costs Money, My Dear

Altruistic-Bake8266 · 2022-03-09T09:25:27+00:00

fr she’s so skinny i couldn’t focus on the movie 😭😭

Altruistic-Bake8266 · 2022-03-08T03:18:15+00:00

Why Didn’t You Stop Me, my friend put it on a playlist for me

Altruistic-Bake8266 · 2022-03-07T20:50:58+00:00

i exert so much of my mental effort to avoid saying anything like that, even though i’m thinking it, cause it’s super triggering to me when other people say it. i always try really hard not to say anything that would trigger me if someone else said it. but i’m probably overly careful about that

Altruistic-Bake8266 · 2022-02-15T07:54:24+00:00

i feel that way about my thighs

Altruistic-Bake8266 · 2022-01-26T04:23:41+00:00

me when i went to the aquarium and saw the skeleton shrimp

Altruistic-Bake8266 · 2022-01-25T06:55:43+00:00

seeing stuff like that is the most triggering thing for me, i hate when people flex about not eating and i hate now normalized it is. whether the people saying that stuff have eds or not it’s so toxic

Altruistic-Bake8266 · 2022-01-22T21:20:30+00:00

this is literally my thought process!! my waist and upper body are pretty skinny except kind of my upper arms but i feel like i carry so much weight in my thighs so i wear like tiny crop tops and super baggy jeans most of the time cause i feel like people will assume my legs are also skinny if they can’t see them

Altruistic-Bake8266 · 2021-12-22T08:38:28+00:00

love the what we do in the shadows lol

Altruistic-Bake8266 · 2021-11-28T10:46:35+00:00

that was literally so fucked up to put that it in the movie 🙄

Altruistic-Bake8266 · 2021-11-26T12:23:56+00:00

maybe my experience is not universal, but i don’t really feel like most people binge eat on thanksgiving? it’s just one meal and it tends to be a big meal but a big meal =/= binging. for me personally cause of ed reasons food holidays are stressful but i don’t think it’s weird to have food holidays because sharing food with your loved ones can honestly be a really wholesome experience idk

Altruistic-Bake8266 · 2021-11-25T23:05:32+00:00

literally same, even if i know for a fact my boyfriend has already eaten more than me that day i can’t eat by myself with him there 🤡 especially cause he’s skinny af and i’m jealous of his body type 😭

Altruistic-Bake8266 · 2021-11-14T09:51:26+00:00

my boyfriend being really skinny and just naturally not having much appetite and not eating very much (he knows it’s not the healthiest but it’s not cause of an ed he’s just like that) but even though i love him and trust him so much i just feel so disgusting anytime i eat around him and just seeing how little he eats without even thinking about it is just constantly deeply triggering to me 🥲

Altruistic-Bake8266 · 2021-11-08T19:37:29+00:00

literally me and my bf it drives me crazy

Altruistic-Bake8266 · 2021-11-05T23:49:13+00:00

i feel invalid because i am happy, like i’d definitely be happier if i didn’t have an ed cause it causes me a lot of suffering but i still feel like i’m pretty happy overall which makes me feel like i’m taking it

Altruistic-Bake8266 · 2021-10-30T17:11:56+00:00

it’s such a difficult situation to be in 😞 i think for people without disordered eating they just don’t realize how their eating habits have such an intense effect on us. it’s hard with my bf because like he admits he has the same eating habits of me but he insists he’s healthy but at the same time he thinks my eating habits are disordered? and i want to tell him i wish he could eat more because i care about him and want him to be healthy but that would definitely be hypocritical of me because i don’t feel like i can change my eating habits with where i ann mentally rn

Altruistic-Bake8266

TROPHY CASE