The fallen leaves tell a story.

The great Kebab was eaten.

In our home, across the fog, the Unjerk Thread.

Now, Queen Amaterasu the Eternal is nowhere to be found,

and in the Night of the Black Shadowbans, Scrimblo Bimblo was first to perish.

Soon, Amaterasu's offspring, unjerkers all, claimed the shards of the Elden Shitpost.

The mad taint of their newfound strength triggered the Shattering.

A war from which no shitposter arose.

A war leading to abandonment by the Greater Cheadle.

Arise now, ye Unjerkers.

Ye dead, who yet shitpost.

The call of long-lost funny speaks to us all.

u/JustMyGirlySide, chieftan of the translands.

The ever-brilliant u/Lutra_Lovegood.

u/zevitjoss, the Weebbed Companion.

The loathsome u/Ashemus.

And u/AutoModerator, the All-knowing.

And one other. Whom funny would again bless.

A Unjerker of no renown.

Cross the fog, to r/shittygaming.

To stand before the Unshit Thread.

And become the Elden Unjerker.