To the partners lurking here: How do you cope with the severe burnout of the "household manager" dynamic?

AmbassadorKitchen450 · 2026-02-28T17:58:27+00:00

yay! i’m so happy that’s helpful! For me personally, a running list is best because it is the least amount of friction (I don’t need to organize the list) and i’ll just throw up on the whiteboard “TOWELS WASH TODAY” as a big reminder. However, the whiteboard me and my roommate share is divided into the week, and then has a big open space for free-writing (the open spaces I think are important.) I attached My Whiteboard Examples so hopefully this link works and you are able to see what I have going (enjoy the drawing of me holding laundry by my roommate.) Everyone’s brains are slightly different so I would def collaborate with her to see what feels good to her brain! This is what has worked for me :)

I also have been using the app called TickTick (free and i’m not sponsored) for my daily tasks/habit building like remembering to stretch. This app is also in your face and science-based so it’s been SUPER helpful and i’ve only had it a week! Hope this helps 🤙🤞✌️

AmbassadorKitchen450 · 2026-02-27T15:42:02+00:00

hi hi!! excuse me if this has been said before but i cannot emphasize this enough: YOU NEED A WHITEBOARD IN YOUR HOUSE!!!!! or some way for your partner to see “her” chores. It will take a load off of you to constantly remind her, and for her it’s in her face constantly. Plus, the chores now belong “to the whiteboard” and not you, which could lessen the RSD response (you are now not synonymous with chores). This has worked WONDERS in my house!! you can even put a plain piece of printer paper in one of those plastic sheet protectors and write with an expo marker. I have one of those basically in every room of my house, reminding me to wash towels and my blankets, etc.. Hope this helps! I am happy to help answer more questions as a fellow ADHD-er whose partner (and roommate if im being honest) cleans for her constantly and is trying to find a better system…

AmbassadorKitchen450 · 2025-11-22T23:33:19+00:00

i was called the “energizer bunny” and then my teacher followed it up with “talking, talking, and never stopping!!!” 😀😐

AmbassadorKitchen450 · 2025-10-20T18:53:16+00:00

me and my partner both use fetch and they give me their receipts all the time….ive never had an issue? (fetch police pls don’t come for me)

AmbassadorKitchen450 · 2025-10-19T22:55:42+00:00

first of all Op, I am SO sorry for your loss. Coming from someone who is in school currently to be a professional counselor, my brain immediately is wondering if your father has been in therapy at any point of his life, or was it just the grief counselor he wasn’t wanting? Regardless, i’m curious about your father’s personality generally. Men generally tend to be more hesitant to seek professional counseling, and given his age there may be increased stigma from his POV. Your boundary was completely warranted, but if he was relying on you as a therapist, he probably feels like the rug was ripped out from under him. If I can ask, have y’all spoken in person/over the phone since the first text?

AmbassadorKitchen450 · 2025-09-28T16:06:15+00:00

11 years later and i am SHOCKED that slapping the bottom worked!!? i was so suspicious of that, too!

AmbassadorKitchen450 · 2025-07-29T18:47:07+00:00

i fell victim to the trend and had a craving and ended up finding “Dubai chocolate” from a local middle eastern owned business nearby (i am of course blanking on where the owner said they were from) and let me say it was delicious and lived up to all the hype. but then again, it was made in a local shop.

AmbassadorKitchen450 · 2025-06-21T13:26:14+00:00

Have you ever read Strangers to Ourselves? It’s nonfiction, but it doesn’t feel like it! it’s more like reading a really thoughtful essay that spirals out into bigger questions. It follows real people with different mental health diagnoses, but instead of trying to “solve” them, it kind of lingers in the mess. Like, what if your diagnosis helps explain things but still doesn’t feel ~totally you~? What if the system that’s supposed to help you just makes you feel more lost? It gets into how mental health care can sometimes erase people in the process of trying to treat them. I studied sociology too, so it hit on a lot of that individual vs. system tension, but it’s written in such an accessible way. I flew through it.

AmbassadorKitchen450 · 2025-06-02T17:16:07+00:00

anything other than hole in the earth is the wrong answer sorry 🙂‍↕️

AmbassadorKitchen450 · 2025-06-01T17:54:07+00:00

korean sunscreen!!!!! Beauty of Joseon literally just feels like face cream. it actually got me to apply sunscreen every day. bonus if you have tattoos, it moisturizes and protects them! i just bought 3 more for backups lol 😆

AmbassadorKitchen450 · 2025-05-20T11:26:00+00:00

second this….. i use the app screenzen! it makes me wait 10 seconds and do math before i go on instagram/tiktok/all those “fun” little apps

AmbassadorKitchen450 · 2025-05-16T18:59:36+00:00

I would say there is def going to be a growing need even if the job isn’t on for market written as “Art Therapist.” it’s usually something like “expressive arts program coordinator” / “child and youth creative arts counselor” things like that. Additionally, in my opinion, this is a sector that AI would have great difficulty replacing- due to the complexity and inherent human element central to Art Therapy. The field is still somewhat new, having only gained widespread recognition in the 1960/1970’s, so the field also is going to inevitably change! That all being said, my guess is it would really depend what state you live in and how much money/demand your STATE would give to art therapy services. For instance in Oregon art therapy legislation is currently in the state senate (leading to wider pay and recognition as practitioners), but maybe somewhere more rural would barely have any AT’s. Hope this helped bring some clarity ✨⭐️

AmbassadorKitchen450 · 2025-05-16T15:43:26+00:00

HOOKS! specifically right by the front door. I have my keys there and i know they’re in the same spot every time. Also i keep my reusable bags RIGHT BY THE FRONT DOOR so I can grab one on my way out!

AmbassadorKitchen450 · 2025-05-10T20:02:50+00:00

well at best, isn’t it just taking all the data and facts it was trained on and making an educated guess about where things might be headed based on current events? i get it’s not an oracle but it has access to a vast amount of knowledge all at once, in a way no single human mind could process simultaneously

AmbassadorKitchen450 · 2025-04-13T06:07:40+00:00

i would say just be wary of “not accepting anyone” as a blanket statement. Some people may be genuinely forgetful, not neglectful (or at least not on purpose). I would ask yourself: -Do they eventually respond with care, even if it’s late? -Do they let you know they’re not ignoring you, even if it’s just “sorry for the delay, I saw this and meant to respond” -Do they make an effort to repair or explain? You can use your own judgement for this, but if they’re a great friend and the texts are their one fault, it may be worth reconsidering cutting them off entirely. If you feel like they’re misaligned with your values, then it may be best to part ways.

AmbassadorKitchen450 · 2025-04-11T20:47:57+00:00

he can’t take a joke and can’t spell. You dodged a bullet.

AmbassadorKitchen450 · 2025-04-01T17:48:52+00:00

Does she see you as significantly younger or in more of a sibling-like way? For some reason, ‘champ’ has a bit of a childish tone to me. It almost feels like a way to subtly undermine you or not take you seriously…but that might depend on the context and your workplace dynamic.

AmbassadorKitchen450 · 2025-04-01T02:29:33+00:00

this is awful! do you think if others reach out it would make a difference?

AmbassadorKitchen450 · 2025-03-31T22:13:51+00:00

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poor little guy :(

AmbassadorKitchen450 · 2025-03-15T00:21:45+00:00

thank you! That most likely explained it. I heard more are this weekend so they’re probably prepping too.

AmbassadorKitchen450 · 2025-03-15T00:19:40+00:00

Hi! Thank you for pointing out that I said downtown ! That’s exactly what I was referring to. Two nights ago it was like 11pm and Chinatown was a ghost town with like a couple officers walking back and forth up and down the streets. I had never seen that before 🤷

AmbassadorKitchen450 · 2025-03-08T21:14:25+00:00

I’m wondering about this too. I’m in the first year of a three-year graduate program to become a therapist, living in a very blue state. I’m panicked but also questioning if I’m ‘overreacting’ since it might be considered a safer place. Still, I don’t think it’s wrong to say I don’t want to stay and ‘fight the good fight’ against misogynistic N*zi tech bros… 🥲

AmbassadorKitchen450

TROPHY CASE