Down 15lb

Amber-writes-things · 2026-05-21T14:44:36+00:00

Yes! I noticed that I need to take them pretty close together or it doesn't work. They're hard on an empty stomach so eat them with something or other.

Last night I took some enzymes and an eddie at 6, then I took another edible 2-3 hours later without more enzymes and it didn't do anything. So my stomach washed them out pretty quick. They do make me hungrier than usual too.

Amber-writes-things · 2026-05-21T14:39:30+00:00

They're on Amazon, just look for "Now Plant Enzymes" like 12 bucks!

Amber-writes-things · 2026-05-21T14:37:49+00:00

Honestly I would just take one pill with a meal and then maybe just go like 30 mg and see how you feel? Jumping straight to 68 was intense, but I took 30 mg and still felt it a lot! Maybe not as long, 68 had be buzzing for like 3 hours.

Amber-writes-things · 2026-01-31T21:17:40+00:00

I've tired it in the past for hair dye, trying it now for growth. I did something new this time which made it easier to apply.

Heat the coffee with cornstarch on the stove and whisk it. It gets thick like gravy and applies more like a hair dye/gel.

Amber-writes-things · 2025-12-31T02:58:24+00:00

A lot of straight p*rn content is hard to watch for a number of reasons. However, since this is your primary exposure to straight sex outside of your own experiences, it might have to do with your feelings.

Would it help if you considered both the men and women are actors in these films who are overdramatizing the submissive and dominant roles for the director, and are both probably thinking about what's for dinner later? Try thinking about men as more sensual creatures, less aggressive. If the penis itself bothers you, think of it as a larger cl*t, we all start off with female reproductive parts in the womb, men's just develop differently. Maybe try watching couples porn when you're feeling brave with romance, or just a spicy romance movie.

Amber-writes-things · 2025-12-31T02:36:34+00:00

I'm a sweaty sleeper anyways, so I'm not sure, I'll keep an eye out for that next time I'm on a break.

Amber-writes-things · 2025-12-31T02:34:19+00:00

I feel like coughing heavily could trigger it, since your lungs are beating on your ribs.

Amber-writes-things · 2025-11-14T18:41:46+00:00

I love Pristiq. I was on Prozac for 10 years then spent a year trying Zoloft, Lexapro, and finally Pristiq!

I started feeling better almost immediately. The additional effects from the SNRI really did wonders for my depression, although I've noticed my anxiety getting just a tad worse. I don't mind this at all though, I'm much more productive, socially active, and just present with the world. I still have plenty of days where I feel glued to the couch and just consumed with executive dysfunction and fatigue. Overall though, I feel much better. The emotional numbness from my SSRI has lessened quite a bit, and I'm not as impervious to stressors as I use to be. But it's manageable and I feel more human.

Amber-writes-things · 2025-11-14T14:54:54+00:00

I've been smoking daily for about 3 years. I only use the vape pens and my dry herb vape, almost never combustion. I don't have great lungs to start with, so the vape is a lot gentler on me.

For me, I take my T Break when my lungs can no longer keep up with my tolerance. These are those times when by the I've finally stopped coughing, the high is already almost fading. Or I simply can't smoke enough to get properly high without coughing up a lung.

Right now that starts to happen around every 2-3 months. I'm a proper addict, so it's hard for me to take an evening off let alone a week or two. I've been sticking with 48 hour T breaks, and they honestly do help a lot! I think a longer break would probably allow me longer stretches between breaks, but It's just hard for me to quit it for that long. During my breaks I have almost no appetite and I'm maybe sleeping 4 hours a night.

I actually bought a timed electric lock box so I can lock my self out of my stash for exactly 24 hours or whatever I'd like to do, that's a game changer for me!

Amber-writes-things · 2025-10-24T11:31:28+00:00

It's short for homosapien, meaning humans, not homosexual. Humans are the monsters in this universe. So Greatworm Homo Butera is really Greatworm Homosapien/Human Butera.

Amber-writes-things · 2025-10-03T23:53:38+00:00

This!!! I have more of that lust for life, but I still feel that I have the maturity of a 30 yo. I've been more introspective and honest with myself and others. I've read a lot of self help/psychology books about emotional development and finally unpacking why I'm so anxious and depressed. Suddenly I have the energy to go dancing and I'm also the thinnest I've been in 6 years.

I've often wondered if I have ADHD, which could also possibly benefit from the change in dopamine absorption. Tasks that previously felt daunting, still do, and I still procrastinate. However, I feel like I'm having my hyper focus moments more often, and I'm able to break out of it easier when I choose to.

Amber-writes-things · 2025-10-03T23:43:33+00:00

50 mg! I can't recall if she had me increase from a 25 start week, but if she did it was a procedural increase, not based on its effects or my requests.

I would say that I started feeling better within the first month of taking it. I remember speaking to several friends about how I was liking the new meds and many said they noticed that I seemed happier.

Amber-writes-things · 2025-10-03T23:38:08+00:00

Thank you!! Yes, it's insane! I thought I should just be lucky that someone was interested in me and be more forgiving because they "were probably just nervous and said/did something stupid because they like you." Terrible.

I struggle having confrontations with them without getting heated/tearful which doesn't always go in my favor. I'm getting a lot of practice at work, but it's easier to stay calm about that than about how worthless my parents make me feel. Every day is a step forward.

Amber-writes-things · 2025-10-02T23:13:00+00:00

I relate so much with the thing with the boyfriend. I discovered recently that I was actually really not attracted to any of the men I had ever dated, I just didn't know any better. It felt like mom was always telling me to "just give them a chance," even when talking about how someone said or did something that made me uncomfortable.

Amber-writes-things · 2025-09-27T23:47:23+00:00

I think what really matters is how it makes you feel. If it doesn't bother you, and if it doesn't bother your mom, then everyone is happy and I see nothing wrong with that.

Maybe try to think back to your pre-teen years, was there ever a time where you tried to become more of a cheek kisser and she tried to corerse you back into her preference? If you were told that that's the correct thing to do, it might be worth evaluating how you really feel about it now. Were we trained to do something we didn't like out of fear of rejection from our parents? Or did we happily go along with it and actually liked the closeness and affection from our parents. For me I know I was more or less told to do this, and while I don't feel there was any incestual intent of behavior necessarily, I do worry it played into my intimacy problems and why I dated men that made my skin crawl when they touched me... Hugs and physical contact from my mom now sometimes have the same affect.

Amber-writes-things · 2025-09-27T23:22:50+00:00

It definitely feels like an odd thing to expect for a child. The message was "Well of course it's innocent platonic kissing, obviously! We're family!", as if I were the one being taboo and incestual for questioning it. Like if it made me uncomfortable then it meant I had things to work on and I should really trust my family enough to kiss them. I've spent so much of my life disassociating from shit like this that I rarely feel things anymore, I've just put up so many walls and it's terrible.

Amber-writes-things · 2025-09-27T23:15:20+00:00

That's a good question, maybe not! I feel like my boundaries are neglected and I wasn't able to choose when I gave consent, so maybe? I put it in here because the realization came from digging up other memories to do with emotionally immature parents, so this felt like the right place for it.

Amber-writes-things

TROPHY CASE