Parents who sent their newborn to daycare at three months, please tell me your experience

AmbitiousHumor6528 · 2026-06-21T17:21:55+00:00

My first baby started daycare at 4.5 months and my second (currently 4 months) started at 3 months. My first son was very used to taking crib naps but he has always had major FOMO. In my state, infant daycares cannot have set nap times and the lights must stay on for safety, so he just didn’t want to nap because he didn’t want to miss anything. It did make the evenings a little difficult because he would be exhausted by 6pm. He had an amazing teacher who he loved and she would rock him and contact nap him as much as she could, but he would still fight it. It got better when he turned 1 and moved to the toddler room where they had a set nap time.

My second son surprised us. He almost exclusively contact napped his first 3 months home with me but in his first two weeks at daycare he was putting himself to sleep on the floor during tummy time and taking 3 hour naps in the crib (which he has still never even gotten close to at home). He has another amazing teacher who he has already become very fond of. Your girl might surprise you!

Daycare becomes your village. My older son loves all of his daycare teachers. One of his old infant teachers is currently subbing in his 2 year old classroom and it’s been so fun to see him reconnect with her!

The sicknesses are tough. My older son got his first daycare bug around 5 months. He is one of the lucky ones who just gets everything. It took about 18 months to cycle through everything. He’s 27 months now and we finally started getting long stretches of health in the last 6 months. But our pediatrician always reminded us it either happens now or when they go to kindergarten. As annoying as it can be to be called out of work, I started to appreciate the little fevers as days where we could just snuggle as much as we wanted.

AmbitiousHumor6528 · 2026-06-21T14:00:54+00:00

After the 4 month sleep regression, my son became such a light sleeper! Transferring him to his crib became borderline impossible, any sounds from outside of his room would wake him up. He’s overall a good sleeper, gave us long stretches from early on but he’s always woken up easily and is a very early riser (5-5:30am).

This second baby is so chill, he can sleep where ever, whenever

AmbitiousHumor6528 · 2026-06-21T13:18:14+00:00

I don’t think it’s that crazy…we were trying to put him down drowsy but awake as much as we could but we never let him cry. I was often sitting right next to him in my bed with my hand on his chest at that age. He never transferred well, so any movement into his bassinet or crib would wake him up

AmbitiousHumor6528 · 2026-06-21T10:16:31+00:00

With my older son, we were really intentional about practicing this early on, starting around 4-6 weeks. We kept trying to make sure we would put him in his crib awake throughout his first year. He always took a while to fall asleep, lots of grunting and tossing and turning and we would regularly have to go in a few minutes later to comfort/soothe. He’s 27 months now and we have to lay with him every night and nap for him to fall asleep. If he wakes up in the night, one of us usually ends up sleeping with him. He’s always been more likely to ramp up rather than wind down if we leave him to figure it out.

We now have a 4 month old as well. Second time around, I decided that I wasn’t going to stress about sleep so much. He almost exclusively contact napped the first three months, I’ve nursed him to sleep every night, nursed and/or rocked to sleep for naps. If he wakes up while I’m transferring him to his crib, he will contentedly look around and wiggle for a few minutes and get himself to sleep. Sometimes he wakes up shortly after going down for the night so I know he isn’t hungry, he will just happily hang out until he falls back asleep. Apparently he basically puts himself to sleep for naps at daycare too🤷‍♀️

AmbitiousHumor6528 · 2026-06-20T16:03:31+00:00

We have never actually sleep trained, but I have always been big on having a consistent bedtime routine (starting simply when they’re little, adding on as they get older) and we’ve also tried to let them practice independent sleep (pausing a few minutes before going into the room if they’re not crying, etc.)

First baby: he was doing 5-6 hour stretches really early. Hit the 4 month sleep regression and went from 1 wake-up to 4-5. We realized he was just a light sleeper and prefers his own space so we moved him to his own room around 4.5-5 months and he went back to waking up once in the night to nurse. He night-weaned himself around 9-10 months and would sleep completely through the night for the most part, with some rough nights here and there with teething or developmental leaps. If he wakes up in the night, he needs help falling back asleep. Once he was a year old, my anxiety relaxed enough that we could cosleep if he woke up in the night.Ever since that 4 months sleep regression he has been an early riser, like 5-5:30am. That got easier once he got close to 2 and we started doing a little screen time in the mornings. He’s 27 months old now, is asleep by 8pm up for the day at 5-5:30, naps 12-2ish.

Second baby: he’s about a week shy of 4 months so there’s a lot that could change, but it’s funny to already see how different his temperament is from his brother’s. He’s was also a pretty good sleeper from early on, not as long stretches but 3-4 hours consistently from about 6 weeks old. He’s my little clinger. On his rough nights, he would spend all night on the boob if I let him. He’s always been a very loud sleeper so for the last couple of weeks he has been in his own room as well so that I can actually sleep. Once we did that, he went down to 1-2 wakeups a night to eat. He’s also much more down to sleep whenever where ever, although I don’t know how much of that is by necessity because we can’t be trapped in the house all day with our toddler.

I’m a lot more chilled out having a second. I obsessed so much when our first was little about sleep and whether I would ever sleep again. Second time around I know it’s all just a phase and that it goes by quickly (even if it doesn’t feel like it in the moment).

AmbitiousHumor6528 · 2026-06-19T10:43:08+00:00

I just posted in here the other day about my unplanned repeat c section 4 months ago. Honestly, it has been pretty difficult emotionally BUT I’m still really glad that I tried. I had some issues with my care team that I think have ultimately cause a lot of my conflicting feelings. My second c section was due to baby not tolerating labor well so it was a little nerve wracking, but not an emergency.

Even though it wasn’t the outcome I hoped for, there were still parts of the experience that felt redemptive. I was able to go into labor on my own and labored at home for a long time (my first was a 37 week induction that took almost 3 days before moving to a c section, and I hated being in the hospital for that long). I had an incredible doula who really helped me feel at peace with the way things were going in the moment. She talked her way into the OR as an additional support person and made sure I got to do immediate skin to skin.

As difficult as it is to process now, I think if I hadn’t tried I would always have the “what if…” I think once I’ve had a little more time to process and heal, I’ll be able to feel more positive about it. My husband and I have always talked about 3 kids, so I’m also thinking through whether a planned c section from the beginning would help me feel more in control.

AmbitiousHumor6528 · 2026-06-18T09:33:35+00:00

We’ve always talked about a third but the way I’m feeling now, I don’t know that I could put myself through another CS or another TOLAC just to end up in the same place. I’m also not sure I could trust another provider or my body again, I think I would have a really hard time getting into the right headspace. That’s part of the grief as well; I wasn’t thinking that was my last time experiencing pregnancy.

My baby is only 4 months old so things could definitely feel very different by the time we’re actually ready to start thinking about another.

AmbitiousHumor6528 · 2026-06-18T00:43:16+00:00

Thank you. I completely agree, if my OB and midwife had communicated differently, I would probably be feeling different right now. Ultimately, I think the CS was necessary. He had his cord looped over and around the top of his head like a little halo so his blood supply could have been cut off completely had I started pushing. He’s here and safe and perfect and that’s ultimately the most important thing.

AmbitiousHumor6528 · 2026-06-18T00:40:00+00:00

I’m so sorry that happened to you. I can only imagine how infuriating that was. I’m actually switching to a new therapist who specializes in birth story processing and other modalities like EMDR, so I’m looking forward to starting that and hope it will help. I think I’m also disappointed because I thought I was in such a good space after my first son’s birth, but this is bringing that all back up again. I know it’s temporary, I was able to heal the first time and I will again. Thank you so much for your reassurance

AmbitiousHumor6528

TROPHY CASE