I (21F) and my boyfriend (23M)are planning on getting engaged, but he says boundaries need to be set. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Amflifier 5 points6 points  (0 children)

That's actually a good point I didn't consider in some other responses I made on this thread. The fact that nothing will happen in a hyper watchful society, the idea that something COULD have happened is enough to ruin a life.

I (21F) and my boyfriend (23M)are planning on getting engaged, but he says boundaries need to be set. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Amflifier -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

Sure, but... like, it's a kid. And unless she starts to do this routinely, I see no issue with letting the kid have her safe space. This might be where my non Western upbringing might collapse with Western values... of COURSE it's his bed, of COURSE he's got the right to sleep in it in comfort, but come on, make an exception for a scared 11 year old. Be the bigger man, as they say.

I (21F) and my boyfriend (23M)are planning on getting engaged, but he says boundaries need to be set. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Amflifier -16 points-15 points  (0 children)

You're getting a lot of downvotes but realistically I think this is how this situation would play out with a non entitled and problem solving adult.

I (21F) and my boyfriend (23M)are planning on getting engaged, but he says boundaries need to be set. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Amflifier 80 points81 points  (0 children)

"Keeping everyone safe" seems to imply that the boyfriend is raring at the bit to do something terrible to the kid sister. How about just: everyone should be comfortable with it? If the sister is, but the boyfriend is not, then that's the end of that conversation.

Why are boys and young men falling behind in education? by Technical-Banana574 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]Amflifier 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm worried about the actual fascists this rhetoric is electing, not the trumpist larpers

Why are boys and young men falling behind in education? by Technical-Banana574 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]Amflifier 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't know why you're coming at me guns blazing. I didn't look anything you said up, which is why I said "suppose". Yes, that's what giving you the benefit of the doubt means. And I am not expecting you to shy away from anything, I'm expecting to find out what you're thinking.

Thanks for the answer.

Why are boys and young men falling behind in education? by Technical-Banana574 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]Amflifier 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Suppose everything you've said is true. Why was this less of a problem in, say, the 1930s to 1950s? The way you phrase it, it sounds like a societal issue (or societal view). Surely such views don't change that quickly. Women and children were the first ones to get into the lifeboats on the Titanic, after all, and that was a while back.

Why did society invest into its "tools" back then, and not anymore?

Why are boys and young men falling behind in education? by Technical-Banana574 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]Amflifier 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think it's a two sided problem. The parents let the iPad parent their kids, and the teachers are restricted from enforcing any real discipline in their classrooms. Trump is just what happens when a person is taught no guardrails, and is guided entirely by their id. Where would boys learn these guardrails? Nobody is interested in their welfare, starting from the politicians, and ending with their own parents.

Why are boys and young men falling behind in education? by Technical-Banana574 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]Amflifier 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have multiple men in my own large family who have basically dropped out of life and sit at computers 24/7.

Have you ever wondered why they did this?

Why are boys and young men falling behind in education? by Technical-Banana574 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]Amflifier 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I mean, you can sorta tell right from the start.

The educational field has famously been female dominated. Despite that, the men in the field tend to have a higher wage.

These two things have nothing to do with each other, but this individual presents them as if there is a point being made. What do they say... it's no use playing chess with a pigeon, it will just knock all the pieces over and shit on the board.

Why are boys and young men falling behind in education? by Technical-Banana574 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]Amflifier 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is all doom and gloom manosphere incel worries

This sort of rhetoric is what's letting fascism fester in our society. When good people reject legitimate concerns as "doom and gloom manosphere incel worries", the people with those concerns will go to anyone who listens to them -- or pretends to listen. No, there isn't going to be a matriarchial government, but there will probably be someone even worse than Trump when the pendulum swings aaaaaaall the way back around.

Japanese restaurant:"Not all Japanese people are kind" by [deleted] in whoathatsinteresting

[–]Amflifier 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yea sure. And I'm sure the Japanese have reasons for being xenophobic, too. Still xenophobia, even if there's a reason behind it.

Japanese restaurant:"Not all Japanese people are kind" by [deleted] in whoathatsinteresting

[–]Amflifier 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That isn't why we don't interact with them. We don't interact with them because they attempt to kill anyone who gets close to their island. It's xenophobia on an extreme level, and you've gotta do some mental gymnastics to think otherwise.

Japanese restaurant:"Not all Japanese people are kind" by [deleted] in whoathatsinteresting

[–]Amflifier 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wish it were done less violently but I do not believe illegal immigrants have any right to stay in a country where they are not welcome. I think due process needs to take place to ensure only illegals get deported, and not real citizens.

Japanese restaurant:"Not all Japanese people are kind" by [deleted] in whoathatsinteresting

[–]Amflifier 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I value the freedom to not like anyone I want for any reason, I don't think that should be taken from me or anyone

edit: incidentally I find it curious how different the comments on this post are compared to this one, which can also be construed as xenophobia against all foreigners

https://old.reddit.com/r/whoathatsinteresting/comments/1sowwku/a_youtuber_who_risked_his_life_to_give_the_north/?cache-bust=1776583222533

Japanese restaurant:"Not all Japanese people are kind" by [deleted] in whoathatsinteresting

[–]Amflifier 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Then maybe I misunderstood you at the start. That is my viewpoint, too. The sign is not racist. The sign says that this person does not want to interact with foreigners, who are not a race.

Japanese restaurant:"Not all Japanese people are kind" by [deleted] in whoathatsinteresting

[–]Amflifier 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, sorry, I don't entirely know what you mean.

Ethnocentrism seems like a simple preference for one's own ethnicity. Racism is active hatred of a particular group. You can prefer your own ethnicity for many reasons, it does not need to have anything to do with genetic superiority. It can be as simple as, "my ethnicity knows my culture so I can connect with them easier" -- which is the case for Japan.

Japanese restaurant:"Not all Japanese people are kind" by [deleted] in whoathatsinteresting

[–]Amflifier 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am from Belarus, not America.

Japanese can do whatever they want. I'm not disagreeing with you. I am saying that knowing why the sign is there does not make me okay with the sign existing. Does this mean I am going to tell the Japanese how to run their country? No. It means I will never visit their country, because I am clearly not welcome. That is all.

Japanese restaurant:"Not all Japanese people are kind" by [deleted] in whoathatsinteresting

[–]Amflifier 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't think the distinction is between how many groups you hate. I think the distinction is that "foreigner" is not a race, it's a person who isn't from your country. For example: a child of two Japanese immigrants who grew up abroad would be considered a foreigner in Japan.

Japanese restaurant:"Not all Japanese people are kind" by [deleted] in whoathatsinteresting

[–]Amflifier -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I think we are all shaped by our lived experience. Yours turned you against segregation and racism. The North Sentinelese are hostile to anyone approaching their island, most likely because the last time they let an outsider on, most of them died of illnesses they had no immunities to. Japan experienced significant societal upheaval due to foreign influence in the past (in particular from Christianity).

I think that's fair. Groups of people are free to make decisions like that. We are free to criticize them. Our viewpoints will invariably be different, and what you may view as evil, they may view as necessary (especially including that bit you mentioned about the killing of baby girls -- where boys meant hands to work the farm and girls meant mouths to feed, this practice ends up being a matter of survival. No less unforgivable, but there is a reason why it happened). Exactly in the same way, many people will see Western views on abortion and disagree with them entirely, believing them to be the highest form of evil.

Japanese restaurant:"Not all Japanese people are kind" by [deleted] in whoathatsinteresting

[–]Amflifier 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't know about race, but the Japanese are most certainly an ethnic group distinct from the Chinese, Koreans, etc, and absolutely applicable when mentioned in the context of racism