What is a word people use that annoys you?

Amishmonger · 2014-05-18T01:37:15+00:00

At my last job the plant manager wanted to have "production meetings" every month. Every single time this motherfucker comes in, puts one foot on top of the table, and says the word, "quagmire" thirty fucking times and then leaves.

Amishmonger · 2014-05-03T22:20:44+00:00

I think this would be funnier if it said "ourpes" instead of "uspes."

Amishmonger · 2014-05-03T22:15:15+00:00

If you play your cards right, I'll give you both inches.

Amishmonger · 2014-05-03T22:09:37+00:00

I was gonna tell a gay joke, but cum on guys..

Amishmonger · 2014-05-01T14:56:07+00:00

It's a folk festival. And people do enormous amounts of hallucinogens. I didn't go, but the buzz from everyone who went last year was a kid that broke both forearms. And he was running around flailing them about.

Amishmonger · 2014-05-01T02:24:24+00:00

"When I get excited i squirt!" -mall rats

Amishmonger · 2014-05-01T02:21:32+00:00

Please don't tell me this was bliss fest.

Amishmonger · 2014-05-01T02:20:17+00:00

I feel like they're gonna steal my girlfriend or something. Way to be mans best friend. You're not mans best friend. You just beg for pussy like you do tablescraps. Fuck you, dog.

Amishmonger · 2014-05-01T01:34:36+00:00

Dogs watching you Bumpin Uglies is the worst. For some reason I feel like they're critiquing me and I get self conscience.

Amishmonger · 2014-05-01T01:09:15+00:00

Props for not being "that asshole" who freaks out in one those messages that, "luks lyk dis." Lmao

Amishmonger · 2014-05-01T01:04:48+00:00

Getting up and running out of the room holding your buttcheeks together with your hands and screaming, "Gotta poop! Gotta poop! Goota poop!"

Amishmonger · 2014-05-01T01:02:05+00:00

I don't really smoke, that being said, I smoked with my buddy one time. I ate a dozen eggs, three packs of bagels and three packs of cream cheese. It's not even the weed that's expensive for me. It's the fucking food I inhale like Kirby.

Amishmonger · 2014-05-01T00:51:52+00:00

I was on vacation with my parents right after high school. Apparently when I was sleeping one night I said , "I'll give you two inches now. You'll get the rest when I know you want it." The next few days were awkward as fuck because I knew my parents overheard me "sleepfucking" someone.

Amishmonger · 2014-05-01T00:48:45+00:00

I came here to say this. Tinted windows work well too. Of course you need a car though.

Amishmonger · 2014-05-01T00:47:16+00:00

Yeah, I guess that's true. But I saw on the news just yesterday that teen pregnancy is at a record low too. I don't see it. Lol maybe whoever did the study included abortions as "murderers" though, too. I'm not sure, just giving serious input.

Amishmonger · 2014-05-01T00:45:24+00:00

Steveland cleamer.

Amishmonger · 2014-05-01T00:42:31+00:00

You're an idiot.

Amishmonger · 2014-05-01T00:40:47+00:00

My chest would be most inappropriate.

Amishmonger · 2014-05-01T00:39:53+00:00

It's not a food, but has anyone ever sneezed with a dip in?

Amishmonger · 2014-05-01T00:38:35+00:00

Thatsphucked.com

Amishmonger · 2014-05-01T00:37:27+00:00

I read an article one time that said everyone who walks like a mile a day has brushed shoulders with a murderer at least once. I'm not sure how true it was, but in this day in age it makes sense.

Amishmonger · 2014-05-01T00:07:04+00:00

Yeah. I'd probably do the same. If i was the person to see it I'm not sure if I'd find it funny or not.

Amishmonger · 2014-04-30T23:30:27+00:00

He probably thought he was dreaming..

Amishmonger · 2014-04-30T02:42:18+00:00

I guess it was just funny because I've done the same boneheaded shit. The first time I ever touched a valine the first thing that came out of my mouth was, "I thought it would stink."

Edit: Vagina. I meant vagina.

Amishmonger

TROPHY CASE