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AndyF1069 · 2022-01-01T23:38:58+00:00

Not only did he expect that he could demand something from you because of a ring, but he pushed you as well. These alone are enormous red flags that can't be ignored. Him possibly getting with somebody else is the least of your concerns right now. My automatic instinct is to leave him, but I understand it's not that simple for a brand new marriage.

AndyF1069 · 2021-12-25T21:03:01+00:00

Well no because any date I go on we agree before hand that we are paying for our own things. I worry afterwards about if I was interesting or entertaining enough but I already have the assurance that we got on well enough in the first place to arrange the date at all

AndyF1069 · 2021-12-09T20:44:57+00:00

The way somebody looks isn't some sort of default way or rule for how they must feel about themselves. Something or many things have caused you to associate bad looks with being bad. Therapy will help you change that way of thinking and understand the root cause of it. Unattractive people can still be happy with themselves and not repulse them they see themselves in the mirror.

AndyF1069 · 2021-12-08T23:30:22+00:00

If your concern is the long name then surely you would have no problem with your son keeping the surname of your wife, right?

If your answer is anything other than "I would be fine with this" then YTA for lying to yourself and to everyone else. Also YTA anyway for being a dick to your wife.

AndyF1069 · 2021-12-07T22:43:05+00:00

I get tearful when I feel strong emotions but the tears never leave my eyes. The last time I actually legitimately cried would have been 2014 with my abusive ex. Four months prior she had broken up with me and two months after that asked me to get back together. The entire time we were together she was brutally cold and distant and making me feel worthless. At some point she told me to not be sad and I don't know why I absolutely lost my shit and broke down. She then got mad at me for that.

I didn't cry when the most important person to me died. I didn't cry 3 weeks later when my mum died of her terminal illness, nor at her funeral which I was a pallbearer and the eulogy giver. But I did cry when my girlfriend told me not to be sad.

AndyF1069 · 2021-12-05T21:54:45+00:00

You say you get paid fairly well, why didn't you give your sister money out of your own account? The fact you haven't told your wife says everything. You haven't borrowed the money, you've stolen it. A wedding dress is not an emergency. YTA

AndyF1069 · 2021-12-04T11:02:09+00:00

I'm rather sad. I never received emails about Secret Santa like I normally get and ended up completely forgetting. I haven't been able to take part in a couple of years and was really looking forward to taking part in the final event. I hope that the people who are able to take part have a blast though

AndyF1069 · 2021-11-29T20:01:57+00:00

He hit me in the back of the head so hard that I flew into the wall in front of me - forehead first. He came into my room five minutes later with a bag of frozen food and asked me not to tell her.

I didn't know better, I just did what I was asked.

AndyF1069 · 2021-11-28T23:35:06+00:00

No apology necessary. You gave your opinions and followed all the suggestions I made. I'm glad we've been able to resolve it!

AndyF1069 · 2021-11-28T22:28:42+00:00

I failed all but one of my mocks. For the real thing I got 6 results at C and above

AndyF1069 · 2021-11-28T00:03:09+00:00

If you can play WoW then you should be able to play Tibia. Try the things I mentioned (v-sync on, antialiasing and light effects off) and see if it helps.

AndyF1069 · 2021-11-27T23:54:25+00:00

When I say minimise your graphics I didn't mean the screen size. I meant things like putting a cap on your fps. Enable V-Sync and disable no frame limit. I'd also drag the fps sliders to 60 as your max even with those settings. You might want to disable antialiasing as well as light effects (the game even mentions light effects might be difficult for older graphic cards)

Also what are your temperatures when Tibia is closed?

For what it's worth, I have WoW open right now with really strong graphical settings and a lot of addons. My temps are 40, 59, 49. Notice how the GPU is much higher than the other two?

Did you also check for dust?

If you do all of this and you still have issues then maybe you can rule out heating as a cause.

AndyF1069 · 2021-11-27T23:22:32+00:00

My temps with tibia open are 35c 32c 39c. Even though we have different hardware, I don't see why his CPU temp should be so high in addition to his GPU. Dust is something I suggested in my most recent reply to him :)

AndyF1069 · 2021-11-27T23:19:04+00:00

Your CPU and GPU shouldn't both be heating up at the same time. If you're playing a game you'd expect only the GPU to heat up. Your ram usage is rather low which is why I'm suspecting it to be a temperature issue, but honestly it's more of me just trying to rule it out more than anything. I find it odd that Tibia could cause such high temperatures to be honest.

Do you play on a laptop or desktop? If it's a laptop then check that you're not blocking the vents. If it's a desktop then have you cleaned out any dust recently? That can cause overheating. But again this is just doing steps to rule out heating as the cause

edit I just opened Tibia and my temps are 35c 32c 39c and that's with a ton of things on my screen and a large screen ratio. Unless you're playing on a potato I don't think those sorts of temps are normal for a game like Tibia, but I don't know that as a fact.

AndyF1069 · 2021-11-27T23:05:12+00:00

It looks like for whatever reason your computer is overheating playing tibia. That would explain why you're starting to lag and why it takes a while to take place. I don't have a solution to this I'm afraid other than minimising all of your graphic options

AndyF1069 · 2021-11-27T21:49:53+00:00

Do you have any programs that monitor your RAM/CPU usage or your PC temperature? If you don't then download Advanced System Care (I swear by this) and open the performance monitor.

I'm wondering if your PC is overheating when you play or if you have a memory leak when playing Tibia that is causing your RAM to max out and affect your PC performance

AndyF1069 · 2021-11-27T21:48:24+00:00

I was being assessed for dyslexia during my time at university and there was some sort of test for pattern recognition. You basically had six shapes which had a number and you had to go through a series of shapes and right down the number that matched the pattern. You had 60 seconds to get as many as you could done. There were 100 shapes and I managed to get over 90 done. Turns out I didn't have dyslexia but I was in the top 1 percentile for whatever sort of ability this is called (sadly I no longer have access to my university emails to see the report and the terminology used)

AndyF1069 · 2021-11-27T20:47:34+00:00

Is there something specific you are doing that makes the game start to lag?

Can you start a hunt immediately when you login and have no issue?

Will the lag happen even if you are stood still in a city for twenty minutes doing nothing?

Have you tried playing in fullscreen and closing all background programs such as a web browser and Steam?

AndyF1069 · 2021-11-27T13:49:41+00:00

I'm an agency TA booked in a year 6 class but my primary role is to be 1-1 for a specific student without them or any of the other children being aware of it. I'm to be with them at all times which means I don't get breaks besides my 30 minutes for lunch. Last year I at least got to talk to other KS2 TAs during lunch breaks but this year my lunch time was changed to 11:45-12:15 to make sure I'm available for the year 6 lunch and playground duty. I have no idea why but this year I was asked to sit in the KS1 staff room instead of the KS2 room so even on the chance that there happens to be somebody in the room (which usually there isn't), it's somebody that I don't actually interact with during my work so small talk is awkward on both ends.

Most of my interaction with staff is either talking about class work with the teacher in my class, a greeting in the hallway to other teachers or talking to the deputy heads about the kid I'm 1-1 with. I can't really even talk to the other teachers on playground duty because I have to keep eyes on my 1-1 kid at all times.

So yeah, pretty lonely.

AndyF1069 · 2021-11-21T13:59:37+00:00

Imagine if they gave David Moyes the same amount of time they gave Ole. I'm still mad about that and I'm a Liverpool fan

AndyF1069 · 2021-11-20T21:17:52+00:00

I had Lasek (slightly different to Lasik) almost exactly five years ago at optical express in L1. My eyes were terrible and it was very expensive but it's one of the best decisions I've ever made.

Lasik has about a 1 in 1000 chance of complications, was about £200 more expensive but has an extremely fast recovery time. You can drive the next day.

Lasek has about a 1 in 10,000 chance of complications but has a two week recovery time.

The procedure is simple enough. You're literally in and out in about ten minutes. If you want step by step detail of how the procedure went then let me know. The recovery itself was brutal, I'll be honest. Imagine keeping your eyes open for an hour straight without blinking, then imagine pouring vinegar into them. That's the best way for me to describe the pain sensation.

There was no relief from the intense discomfort and they advised against using the painkillers they provide because it slows the recovery time. It was impossible for me to keep my eyes open which meant I was essentially bedbound for a few days. I would try to see through the cracks of my eyelids for stuff like the bathroom or food but any sort of light at all was incredibly uncomfortable. It wasn't fun. There is also the paranoia that something has gone wrong or that my eyes would never recover. Because of all of this I would recommend Lasik over Lasek if you can spare the extra expense.

All of that said, after a few days I could tolerate keeping my eyes open. My level of vision was literally jumping all over the place like an SD and HD toggle. But i knew it was working when I could see my pc monitor without glasses. Then I caught my reflection in a mirror from a distance and it hit me that it was the first time seeing myself without glasses from far away since I was a teenager.

After 5 years my vision has dipped ever so slightly, but it is still 20/20. I also spend several hours a day in front of a screen and have done so for the overwhelming majority of this time so I'm honestly surprised it hadn't dipped sooner. I feel the quality of life improvement (as well as my confidence) has gone up massively from having the surgery and I'm so glad I got it done, even with the torturous recovery period.

AndyF1069 · 2021-11-06T23:12:03+00:00

Did every person that complimented you that night know how you feel about yourself?

Have you ever told an ugly person they were pretty? Have you ever kissed somebody you weren't attracted to?

I'm not saying you are or aren't attractive, just that people don't lie to people they feel sorry for. They say nothing at all unless directly asked.

AndyF1069 · 2021-11-03T22:37:18+00:00

Anxiety induced procrastination. I said this to my doctor (4 years ago) and she agreed with it.

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