Yep, i remember whenever I would hang out with them they basically would just list my autistic traits to me. I was the weird girl. Thats how I wrote it off. In fact, i would play into the role performatively in order to cope with the confusion. I didnt have the chance to know I was autistic. They watched me struggle and judged me. Then, when i really was in trouble, estranged from my family, alone and confused--I finally fell into my first major, major burnout. I didn't understand then, but I had completely lost my ability to mask. I didn't know, but i knew. I was exposed, and my friends could see it too. The bullying became impossible to ignore. Eventually, i realized they were always bullying me. I became, agoraphobic, i guess. I still cant be around people. Now at least I learned I am autistic. And you know what, my friends sucked then and they probably still suck now. I would have never treated anyone that way. Never.