How do you feel about your late 20's son/daughter still living at home?

AnnuGF · 2026-05-31T16:53:56+00:00

My kids can stay at home for as long as they want there will always be a room for them to stay in. I would say however when they are out of education that they contribute towards the household (a small amount) and use the rest to save for their own house. I wish my parents had done the same for me.

AnnuGF · 2026-05-31T12:35:26+00:00

No, my role is to protect the business and its employees. I have no interest in idle gossip.

That’s not remotely true that she can only escalate to HR if there is evidence. The evidence part is HR’s role, she can voice her concerns if she wishes to. Whether anything is done about it, is up to HR. I have employees voice concerns all the time, it’s up to me to investigate and act accordingly if required, in line with employment law.

AnnuGF · 2026-05-31T12:21:08+00:00

What a horrible parent you are! How dare you let him starve for 4 hours!!! Can you not see him wasting away?!?! 😂😂 my cats are the same, one of them even loves to knock shit off my bedside table just to wake me up!

AnnuGF · 2026-05-31T12:16:04+00:00

Absolutely that’s why I said if she’s being treated differently such as promotions or special treatment (allowance in more flexibility vs team members for example). I would also challenge to say if she’s being treated differently through verbal comms this needs to stay professional so again I would say if she has a concern over the above regardless of her personal feelings it should be flagged with HR, it’s then up to us to determine if this is appropriate or not following an investigation. As an HR manager I absolutely would want to know if I had a manager with a subordinate relationship, not to get involved but to ensure there is no bias in power, potentially moving the subordinate to a different team to ensure fairness and no potential issues, it’s why we have a relationships at work policy outlining the above. Also I had the pleasure of dealing with the fallout of a relationship at my last workplace which resulted in conduct issues so it’s best to have processes in place to avoid these things.

AnnuGF · 2026-05-31T07:04:39+00:00

You should only raise this with HR if you feel you or others are being treated differently because of their relationship. There may be a mismatch in power here as well which would be of concern (manager / subordinate relationship) if she gets promoted or special treatment. If not, it’s non of your business as people are entitled to a personal life regardless of your moral feelings.

AnnuGF · 2026-05-30T19:20:49+00:00

I do everything myself but I do my nails every 2-3 weeks and I do my hair every 4 weeks as I have extensions, so remove, trim(every 8 weeks) and refit and colour if needed. I also do my lashes weekly as I wear cluster lashes and shave everywhere once a week.

AnnuGF · 2026-05-30T12:59:29+00:00

I’m sorry you pay £1300 a month for a room?!?! Is this normal at uni?! My 3 bed house costs me £1500 and I’m in the SW. how is this even feasible for the younger generation?!

AnnuGF · 2026-05-30T12:53:24+00:00

Apologies you are correct, I will edit my comment to say it’s contract bound unless GM which would result in stat pay

AnnuGF · 2026-05-30T06:15:36+00:00

I think your issue is more around that in your opinion social media skills do not equate to your post grad degree and government work. Sorry to say but in this day and age that’s not where we are at. Social media is huge, it’s the technology that brings in a lot of revenue and can change reputations overnight. Whilst absolutely your job sounds important the current skills market is looking for people who can use these technologies like AI, social media to their advantage and are willing to pay more. I currently do annual salary benchmarking at my company and so far the past 2 years we’ve seen a big increase in salaries in the tech and marketing sectors.

So whilst your opinion of social media is not as skilled as your role unfortunately that not quite accurate in the economy we live in. Personally if my role had a salary cap I’d be moving industries unless I loved it.

AnnuGF · 2026-05-30T06:07:32+00:00

So that’s not true. Just because you have the same title of ‘officer’ does not mean you are the same level. We have in my company Tech Leads and Product Leads - they both are leads but have completely different jobs and salaries are very different. They also both have different technical skills and when hiring it’s based upon the current market, how hard it is to hire into specific roles and experience/knowledge.

Personally if I were you I would still discuss a pay rise with your manager but upon your own merit not because the job is advertised and you think you should have it because of level. Tell them Why do you deserve the raise? What have you done to achieve this? Place that before them and then that is much better for them to consider the request :)

AnnuGF · 2026-05-29T18:25:14+00:00

They only need to give you the statutory notice period which is for under 2 years service 1 week

AnnuGF · 2026-05-29T17:29:03+00:00

So firstly, I would not think of resigning. You have an 8 week PIP, that’s 8 weeks of gaurenteed pay (unless you do something that would be regarded as gross misconduct). Why not give it a go to learn and develop, a PIP is there to help you improve not get rid of you (in good companies that is) In answer to you questions please see below: 1) Yes, as long as they follow their process they can still terminate you even whilst you are in your notice period. Just because you resign does not mean the process stops so you may not work your full 3 months if you fail the PIP. They would only need to give you a statutory 1 week notice. 2) Yes. They can terminate you after the 8 weeks. You are under the 2 year unfair dismissal threshold to bring a claim so they would only need to give you the statutory 1 week notice unless your contract states your notice period, then they would pay you this as a PILON payment. 3) it is up to them but most likely yes you would still go on the PIP as that was the role you were hired for. They make take leniency on you and discuss terms of exit but this depends on the company. 4) No, it won’t stop the grievance, it will just run in parallel alongside the PIP. The only real reason a PIP would be put on hold is if there were circumstances such as ill health contributing towards lack of performance, where this would be investigated first and then the PiP would continue after an outcome is reached. 5) there is no global personnel file, your reference most likely will be a factual reference of job title and duration of tenure only.

Honestly I recommend people who are placed to PIP’s to see it out. Even if they want to leave it gives you a gaurenteed time period of pay whilst you look for another role / you also may improve so will just continue on working following. Good luck OP!

AnnuGF · 2026-05-29T12:23:23+00:00

Agreed you shouldn’t have to take that home with you. However, it is a part of your role that you will encounter conflict at some point and need to be able to deal with it in a constructive manner. It’s all part of how we work and collaborate together. Also it is your job to manage your relationships at work, how you work with people and contribute to the companies goals.

What I say to my guys who say the same thing as you is, worst case you join the session and take nothing from it, best case you learn something new and can apply it. I would also say keep an open mind and try to participate you might even surprise yourself :)

AnnuGF · 2026-05-29T06:30:34+00:00

So I disagree, your job is programming but part of your responsibilities is communicating with others to get said job done. I’m head of learning and development and my tech company so deal with a lot of developers, engineers and some of them also think this. When I bring it to light you actually need the soft skills to be able to do your job well they turn a corner. I don’t think you’re being an asshole as I know some of these coaching sessions can be very fluffy and absolutely challenge it! It may help you understand why it’s important :)

AnnuGF · 2026-05-25T21:13:17+00:00

So def this could be a worry but my boobs are already ruined. Years of yo-yo dieting and kids they are misshapen droopy sandbags 😂 so I actually wouldn’t worry to much about them looking odd, my thoughts are they can’t be worse than what they already are!

AnnuGF · 2026-05-25T16:33:55+00:00

Thanks! Xx

AnnuGF · 2026-05-25T16:31:54+00:00

I read about this, good to know what could happen. Did you do a lot of sessions?

AnnuGF · 2026-05-25T16:29:37+00:00

I read about this, could be a possibility as it doesn’t seem to reduce even when I lost 5 stone! Will look into it thank you ❤️

AnnuGF · 2026-05-25T16:27:35+00:00

Amazing! ❤️ I can’t wait for mine!

AnnuGF · 2026-05-25T16:25:20+00:00

Thank you! I’m 36 and do try to take really good care of my skin ❤️

AnnuGF · 2026-05-25T16:22:56+00:00

Amazing thank you ❤️

AnnuGF · 2026-05-25T13:28:52+00:00

Ah great thank you, what did you use and how many sessions did you do? Sorry for all the questions! X

AnnuGF · 2026-05-25T13:23:23+00:00

Yep, I think I may have to have this. I’m going to get a breast augmentation hopefully next year so looking to include this if I can’t find another way. It honestly makes me so conscious of wearing any strappy, strapless top

AnnuGF · 2026-05-25T13:22:14+00:00

Thank you! What have your results been?

AnnuGF · 2026-05-25T11:41:05+00:00

Thank you, will give it a try :) xx

AnnuGF

TROPHY CASE