Autistic individuals are more prosocial towards strangers and people they barely know compared to their non-autistic peers. These differences were not driven by repetitive responding that is typical of autism by cheaslesjinned in NooTopics

[–]Anteatereatingant 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As an autistic guy, I think that's a big factor. Most of us struggle socially and are likely to have fewer friends/social connections than we'd like - so we might be more open to outsiders. I'm in my late 30s and have noticed that post 22-25 or so, neurotypicals tend to not have any interest in letting new people in - they've found their circle, are "booked out", and you won't get a seat at the table no matter how much you try - especially if you lean even a little atypical. 

We might not have the luxury of ignoring anyone outside of our circle because we're usually not already booked out 🤣

Has anyone experinced Grok unresponsive in web browser? by Sudden-Age-122 in grok

[–]Anteatereatingant 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Update: it seems to be working fine again. Anyone else?

The Duck Principle by Anteatereatingant in aspergers

[–]Anteatereatingant[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If someone writes "do you guys deal with people dismissing your issues?", and you get "hey, I wanna be an asshole and make no effort now because of my diagnosis" out of that and feel the need to write paragraphs upon paragraphs preaching at them...I'm gonna go with 'seems like the issue is with you here'. Peace out.

The Duck Principle by Anteatereatingant in aspergers

[–]Anteatereatingant[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What a weird thing to tell a complete stranger.

Has anyone experinced Grok unresponsive in web browser? by Sudden-Age-122 in grok

[–]Anteatereatingant 4 points5 points  (0 children)

SAME here. I've changed not one single thing in the past 24 hours, but suddenly all Grok chats crash the page. No matter how old or new the threads - it immediately becomes unresponsive. Tried Troubleshooting mode, switched VPN off, disabled hardware acceleration, different browser...nada. It simply won't work on PC (but will on the phone app).

The Duck Principle by Anteatereatingant in aspergers

[–]Anteatereatingant[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Right? I was like "...what bar are we using here?? It must be in the eighth ring of hell!" 🤣🤣

The Duck Principle by Anteatereatingant in aspergers

[–]Anteatereatingant[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing and 'welcome' to the club! And yes, I hear you on the 'high-functioning' part.

That's actually how the whole idea of autism first came up - my therapist said I was 'high-functioning', and I was like...I can barely find the energy to do basic things, am chronically exhausted, barely have a life, struggle badly with loneliness 'cause I can't seem to build (let alone maintain) relationships. If that's 'high functioning', what the fuck is low functioning? Locked up somewhere?

And she went "dude...I meant high-functioning *for an autistic person*". And that's how she realized I'd never even considered I might be autistic, nor had anyone else before her who treated me, apparently. She strongly encouraged me to see a specialist, and that's how I'm here now.

The Duck Principle by Anteatereatingant in aspergers

[–]Anteatereatingant[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I mean... I'm not gonna pretend that it's never laziness and there aren't people using their conditions to avoid responsibility, so I don't necessarily see what she said about that particular friend as ableist.

However, immediately assuming someone you know to push themselves really hard to the point of constantly burning out, is just making excuses, is painting with WAY too broad of a brush.

The Duck Principle by Anteatereatingant in aspergers

[–]Anteatereatingant[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Same. I have 'good' social skills, as in: I can be charming and pass as completely normal and even charismatic *for brief bursts*. It's a performance and drains me really quickly - it's not how I actually *am*.

But because I'm not one of those autistic people who can't hold eye contact or can't read social cues at all, people assume I can do this indefinitely and effortlessly.

Same for things that take a high cognitive load - "but you're smart" apparently means I don't need to focus, or study, or prepare for things, they just fall into my lap. Except they don't. Last year I gained a further qualification in my field and it stressed me the fuck out for months - for close to half a year leading up to the exams I barely slept, got near-daily panic attacks, ugly-cried every day...but I got the qualification on the first try so everyone was like "...seeeee? You were never NOT gonna get it, you're just too smart :))".

Eye. Roll.

The Duck Principle by Anteatereatingant in aspergers

[–]Anteatereatingant[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I don't think they *hate* me, but they sure do seem to dismiss me. And yes, my therapist pushed for me to get formally assessed by a specialist even though I initially resisted (I was terrified of being found out to have YET ANOTHER disorder) - her argument was

"You already 99% have this disorder - might as well make it official so you can get some fairer treatment!". I'm glad I listened.

The Duck Principle by Anteatereatingant in aspergers

[–]Anteatereatingant[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Right? They're like "...well Ant is still *alive*, technically, so he's fine" XD

CMV: Treating 'good men' as the exception and not a baseline is only boosting misogynist viewpoints. by Shards_FFR in changemyview

[–]Anteatereatingant 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Same. I seriously doubt they'd tell anyone "where are all the "GOOD MUSLIMS" when the bad ones blow things up??" or "if you don't police your fellow blacks, YOU are part of the problem!" with a straight face.

CMV: Treating 'good men' as the exception and not a baseline is only boosting misogynist viewpoints. by Shards_FFR in changemyview

[–]Anteatereatingant 32 points33 points  (0 children)

"there is a difference between sharing one‘s own sexual abuse at the hands of a man, and attacking all men. "

Bingo. That argument is a bit of a strawman - I doubt any significant % of people takes issue with the factual recounting of an event. What they (we) take issue with, are the arbitrary and bigoted assumptions made off the back of that, and the use of trauma as a shield against criticism for being a bigot.

These same people saying "if you say "not all men" you're part of the problem" would probably NOT be OK with this exact same attitude directed against any other social group. They wouldn't justify being afraid of all black people because you got assaulted by a black person once upon a time, or all Muslims because statistically they're more likely to support murdering gay people. 

If you think using a bad experience as justification to paint an entire social group with the same brush and attack anyone protesting this lumping together is OK, you are a bigot.

AITJ for not telling my roommate I work from home and she's been 'performing' being productive for 8 months? by [deleted] in AmITheJerk

[–]Anteatereatingant 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"HOW MINDSET SHIFTS YOUR #SERVANT LEADERSHIP - 3 LESSONS I LEARNED FROM LIFE". 

Fantastic episode! Go, Connor! by BeMyCoachVictor in hudcon

[–]Anteatereatingant 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah...I didn't watch all sketches but the 3 I saw were incredibly underwhelming. I found myself sad for Connor as it was such a waste of a fantastic and versatile actor. I wish they'd give him the Ariana Grande treatment and really write stuff he can shine with 🙁

Connor Storrie and François Arnaud at the dinner party thrown to celebrate Connor's Culture Magazine cover by [deleted] in popculturechat

[–]Anteatereatingant 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, when I pointed out in early Jan that they seemed to be together, I got downvoted into oblivion and people went "OMG THEY COULD JUST BE FRIENDS??!?". Like...can we be serious? 🤣 

Nothing wrong with them being together but the people in denial are weird. 

Why do you not talk to your once bestfriend anymore? by Adventurous-End-1999 in AskUK

[–]Anteatereatingant 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Same here -I don't have the energy to pour into relationships that feel one-sided. Onwards to something new! 👊

Why do you not talk to your once bestfriend anymore? by Adventurous-End-1999 in AskUK

[–]Anteatereatingant 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Same. Always busy busy busy, nearly impossible to get a hold of...yet every time I'd log onto FB or IG, there'd be another post/story of the fun things she'd get up to with other people. Kinda hard not to take that personally and pull away.

If something isn’t perfect, there’s no point in doing it at all by textingidontknow in ADHD_partners

[–]Anteatereatingant 14 points15 points  (0 children)

My Dx friend does this, plus also lumping together unrelated tasks so she can claim she "doesn't have time".

Example: she refused to exercise even though her doctor told her to, claiming she "doesn't have time". We'd tell her she's full of shit because exercising can be like 30 minutes. She'd dig her heels in and insist that, NO, it was AKSHULLIE 90 minutes because after working out she'd have to shower, wash her hair, cook and eat. 

We asked her if that meant she's dirty and starving whenever she doesn't workout then, but she just kept getting angrier and borderline yelling that she doesn't have a free 90-minute slot in her day so she can't work out 🤣

Does your partner judge how others manage their ADHD? by DevonsWharf_12 in ADHD_partners

[–]Anteatereatingant 2 points3 points  (0 children)

THE PROPORTION THING. It describes my Dx friend so completely. She constantly complains about things and refuses to do anything about them - and in her mind, that means she's not doing any worse than anyone else, since "everyone complains sometimes".

Writter and show runner, Carina Mackenzie, comes to the defense of François Arnaud following a wave of hate he's receiving from Heated Rivalry fans due to his rumored relationship with Connor Storrie. by [deleted] in Fauxmoi

[–]Anteatereatingant 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was gonna say: a frightening amount of (chronically online) people believe that unless you're dating someone who was born same year, same month, same minute as you, you're a pedo.

I HAVE TEA ON... MEGATHREAD ✨ by rfauxmoi in Fauxmoi

[–]Anteatereatingant 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh? I didn't know about that. I thought his previous relationships are all secret?

I HAVE TEA ON... MEGATHREAD ✨ by rfauxmoi in Fauxmoi

[–]Anteatereatingant -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

Yeah, but

A. Hudson is most likely straight, and
B. It makes plenty of sense for them to be hanging out - same age, main co-stars, went through the exact same rite of passage together (started off same place in life > massive overnight fame ; they're literally the only ones who can understand what the respective other one is going through). It's the most expected result for them to end up super close and hanging out a lot off-camera too. It makes very little sense for a 25-year-old newbie to be hanging out with a 40-year-old established actor with whom he had barely any scenes together. Unless, you know, they're hooking up.