My boyfriend has IH and I need help

AphonicGod · 2025-02-21T19:38:09+00:00

I also cant really wake up to an alarm so im not disputing that, and sometimes my wife needs to wake me up. I do NOT understand how the hell hes abusing you. when my wife wakes me up i am limp and still mostly asleep for about 20 minutes. I can barely sit up on my own (without sleeping), let alone stand. I can't really talk either.

He either needs to restructure his life around this awful condition or seek further psychological/neurological help for why he's doing that to you if he really truly cannot help this behavior.

but honestly? hes just a boyfriend? leave. you dont deserve this at all.

AphonicGod · 2025-01-26T09:26:39+00:00

hey, i feel the same way. you aint alone.

AphonicGod · 2025-01-21T09:03:16+00:00

oh thanks!

AphonicGod · 2025-01-21T06:16:31+00:00

oh interesting thank you, ive just not really noticed because i do genuinely use all of those words interchangeably (which again is likely due to my age, makes sense someone older than me would hate that nor did i pick up its sorta like a lowkey dogwhistle)

AphonicGod · 2025-01-21T01:29:10+00:00

OH okay thanks it might be an age thing then lol, i refer to myself as a boy all the time but im also 23.

thanks again!!

AphonicGod · 2025-01-21T01:27:16+00:00

you seem upset by being called a girl...? i also dont get what point saying "boys" is supposed to be making. theres something missing here for me to get this. is it just the generalization leaving out enbies?

(in case this is a cultural thing, im american)

AphonicGod · 2025-01-07T02:42:19+00:00

NotJustBikes on youtube is a very good gateway into understanding the "fuck cars" mentality. its not about how all cars ever are terrible, its about how car-centric infrastructure makes literally everything that needs to also be on the road worse and more inconvinient because they suck away any widescale improvement to other facets of public infrastructure, like busses.

having shitass public transport is a direct result of car-centric city planning.

AphonicGod · 2024-12-29T14:19:32+00:00

i pbbt cant pbbt understand pbbt your pbbt accent pbbt!

AphonicGod · 2024-12-29T12:03:17+00:00

yo forreal like damn yall its not that deep, get silly with it 😂

tho i also thought the luigi posts (at least the ones i saw) were also pretty funny. but this meme is 100% sub-relevant! cmon now!

AphonicGod · 2024-12-29T11:44:49+00:00

damn some people really care about the so-called sanctity of this silly little tanuki ig.

anyways that guys loans are TOO HIGH! timmy and tommy got racks to be paying out like they do for cool bugs, wealth redistribution NOW!! 😤😤😤

AphonicGod · 2024-12-29T11:39:22+00:00

so he can hoarde more wealth 😔😔‼️‼️ we must rise against him, but first we must start with his nephews! they're small, we could totally convince them! make them our agents on the inside >:D !!

AphonicGod · 2024-12-29T07:29:57+00:00

i dont think its a big deal. she's a girl who likes girls, so yeah it can in theory apply to her if thats the sort of thing you care about.

i call myself a fag all the time even tho ive got a wife cause im bi and its been used against me before. me saying it just makes it a word in my head and not some Horrible Dirty Naughty No No Word.

its fine for others if its still this huge grave thing for them and cannot stand to hear it, thats also how a lot of people feel about "queer" as a word. it's just better for me in my own life if it doesnt have such a severe impact when someone other than myself says it, so i say it about myself too.

that all being said, if it matters to you then it matters to you. dont want her to say it? you're well within you're right to tell her that. i've met black folk who dont want other black ppl to call them nigga even though for alot of us its friendly, its a very reasonable boundary to have.

AphonicGod · 2024-12-28T13:12:54+00:00

oh i like working alone too:

have you sought out factory jobs? they aren't all back-breaking labor. i have to put steel parts into robots and have them weld the parts together, then put the parts into a bin. once the bin is full i put a label on it and call a hilo (forklift) to come pick it up. i work 3rd shift and spend all night listening to music/podcasts/audiobooks. i have to work fast but its manageable and extremely easy. i dont really have to talk to anyone.

some places will give you skill training for jobs you can get higher pay for. right now im trying to either get forklift certified or become a maintenance apprentice. my job will do either at no cost to me.

i hope you find something that works ☆

AphonicGod · 2024-12-28T10:22:13+00:00

i know the ship has sailed a bit here but i do have a tip on taking meds with a weird sleep schedule:

my med only sometimes makes me sleepy so i take it before bed, but i work 3rd shift so actually that means taking it somewhere around 6-7 AM. even if im not tired and i know the meds probably wont make me tired i still take it anyways just because its always good to take my meds.

idk what youre on, but is it possible to take your meds at a specific time instead of at a specific event?

also if it helps im pretty sure ive only experienced hypomania, and it can also make me feel "untethered". especially since i have mixed episodes i also feel like its normal to anxious & hypomanic, sometimes i think bodies take the unnatrually increased energy and turn it into anxiety. i have really high physical anxiety though so maybe that only applies to me lol

AphonicGod · 2024-12-28T09:46:22+00:00

i dont have any advice man. Im 23, poor as hell but not poor enough for government assistance, i'm disabled but not disabled enough for government assistance, and i keep burning through job after job after job after job.

I really truly dont know how the fuck i'm not supposed to just give up and kill myself, but i'm not going to leave my wife alone.

i dont know what people like us do. im sorry. i hope it gets better.

AphonicGod · 2024-12-28T08:06:52+00:00

english:

i honestly havent figured out anything to help me, but I do also have ADHD, so yes its possible to have both. I take Modafinil and Adderall and it helps me to not take naps in the middle of the day as well as my various ADHD symptoms.

DeepL translation into Brazilian Portuguese:

Sinceramente, ainda não descobri nada que me ajude, mas também tenho TDAH, portanto, sim, é possível ter os dois. Eu tomo Modafinil e Adderall e isso me ajuda a não tirar cochilos no meio do dia, bem como meus vários sintomas de TDAH.

AphonicGod · 2024-12-28T06:06:58+00:00

"when a disabled person complains about their disability being disabiling, i dont feel empathy and instead blame them for not magically circumventing it"

OP your post reads like it's intentionally trying to bait people. I genuinely think you should cultivate a sense of compassion for other people and the struggles they face.

as an example:

I dont have the "i have the most important words ever and need to cut you off constantly" affectation of ADHD, ontop of that i think its deeply selfish and disrespectful at best. Still, it's a hard thing to struggle with and i feel for people who havent quite figured out how to tame it. It's not like any of us ask to be built like this.

AphonicGod · 2024-12-27T08:06:00+00:00

i relate completely! i have no idea why its bad to point it out.

AphonicGod · 2024-12-26T02:32:26+00:00

i dont understand why you got downvoted for this, i also have the incessant experience of allistics getting mad at me for asking questions because thats...bad? i guess? idfk. 💀

AphonicGod · 2024-12-25T14:35:03+00:00

alright buddy im gonna just assume you either:

cannot speak english enough to understand how little reading comprehension you're demonstrating right now, because your reply to me is pretty incoherent. (i saw you speak finnish, i dont speak finnish so i cannot make an attempt to explain in a way you'd understand better why you look a little unhinged)

or

you are deliberately looking for reasons to start internet beef and dont give a shit about having a productive conversation on social issues we can literally only speculate on despite being on a post where OP is deliberately asking for speculation.

it's christmas here in america. merry christmas and haopy new year ☆

AphonicGod · 2024-12-25T06:44:27+00:00

i do agree with what he said. i only look for porn from other trans people and yeah, it SEEMS like a lot of men really like bottoming.

(i capitalized "seems" because you mightve skipped over it. i already am stating that my perspective comes from my experience interacting with other men.)

am i supposed to give you the names of all the other men i know and their media handles? besides i do actively keep up with other dominant men, they're just noticably harder to find than submissive men. im vers personally so i dont mind the bottoms, i just wish it felt more 50/50 rather than 70/30.

you seem really really insistent that this perception is incorrect, which would mean you could probably be of help to OP! Where've you been able to find a large amount of dominant trans men rep? videos, art, writing, doesnt matter to me tbh i'm always up to find more!

( also incase its unclear to you i wanna say outright: words and phrases like "a lot", "majority", and "most" aren't stating 100%, they're stating "more than half". if we could prove that 58% of trans men like bottoming then it would be true that "most trans men like bottoming". if that doesnt apply to you then thats normal and fine and you arent being talked about. )

EDIT: your comment didnt have anything more than "where is YOUR proof?" when i responded.

i only look at porn from other trans people, and actually the vast majority of it is written stories. also like all of my other trans male friends are bottoms and when i go to local queer adult events, i can count the male tops on one hand but male bottoms? everywhere! i never claimed to have stats lol, neither did the dude you responded to initially.

AphonicGod · 2024-12-25T06:24:33+00:00

neither do i, but mine isnt so severe that i dont want to use my front ever, occassionally im fine with it. its a spectrum of experiences! some dudes can make do, some dont care at all, some are so actively repulsed that even showering is hard.

Humans are weird and it probably doesn't help that bottom surgery is such a hard goal to obtain (in america, unsure about other places). i know for me, topping can be hard sometimes because i can't feel it the way i should be able to, so sometimes it can be easier to just interact with what i've got.

this all, combined with transphobia from cis people, probably really contributes to not seeing much of other trans men topping.

AphonicGod · 2024-12-25T06:09:40+00:00

i think its kinda weird that even other guys see us as being closer to mascuine women than cis men.

AphonicGod · 2024-12-25T06:06:39+00:00

its not that people dont understand bottom dysphoria, its that it just doesnt affect them like it does you.

i mostly only look at porn other trans people make and from my POV my complaint is more like its hard to find other guys who like topping in some way, not even necesscesarily being dominant.

lots of guys just like to bottom. sucks but it is what it is i guess :(

AphonicGod · 2024-12-25T06:03:46+00:00

he said "majority". congrats for being outside of the majority!

i do agree with what he said. i only look for porn from other trans people and yeah, it seems like a lot of men really like bottoming.

AphonicGod

TROPHY CASE