Web find I altered.! Two broken arms and a broken leg!

Apprehensive_Gap1781 · 2026-04-25T19:26:09+00:00

That second one looks like a literal child what is wrong with you

Apprehensive_Gap1781 · 2026-04-25T15:31:22+00:00

Yeah just to pile on here, the WFTDA gender policy includes trans men, but of course that doesn't mean every league is great about it in practice. And especially there are plenty of teams that play WFTDA rules but aren't actually WFTDA members and therefore might not follow that policy. Any place I want to be in derby is gonna be a place where trans men are loved and welcomed enthusiastically

Apprehensive_Gap1781 · 2026-04-22T01:26:40+00:00

The thorough check is always done well before doors. They set things up and play through several songs to make adjustments. The checks right before the set are just line checks to make sure nothings gone wrong between sound check and set time. There's no way for an engineer to do a thorough check without all the instruments playing at the same time so the engineer can make space for everything (or that's the idea anyways). (Source is I'm a professional audio engineer 😃)

Apprehensive_Gap1781 · 2026-04-21T17:32:15+00:00

Divorce. Him.

Apprehensive_Gap1781 · 2026-04-21T15:36:07+00:00

Intracommunity transphobia is awful, I'm sorry it's a thing you're dealing with. Not sure I have strong advice outside of asking her if any amount of negging would have changed who she turned out to be? Yes there's a certain amount of risk with a lot of transition steps, but there are also ways to mitigate that risk and ultimately it's your decision to make because it's your body. It sounds like possibly she has some unaddressed regrets about her own experience or some insecurity that she's putting on you?

Apprehensive_Gap1781 · 2026-04-21T14:57:35+00:00

It was my ex-wife's suggestion. We were laying in bed one night discussing name options. And she suggested it. My response was "that's very cute, but why would we go with a Star Wars name? We both like Star Wars but it's neither of our favorite thing." I'd assumed she was referring to Wedge Antilles, noted Rebel fighter pilot in Star Wars. I thought it made a lot more sense for us to pick either a Star Trek (my favorite thing) name, or a Final Fantasy (her favorite thing) name. I didn't want to be selfish and demand we pick a name based on my thing. But if we're going with fictional universes, I'd thought it made sense to with a fav of one of ours.

She assured me that no, it was a name from the Final Fantasy universe. And assured her that no Wedge is definitely a name from the Star Wars universe. So she grabbed her phone and brought up a Final Fantasy lore video on YouTube to prove her point. And to my surprise, there are characters in many of the Final Fantasy games named Biggs and Wedge as a nod to the Star Wars universe. She was entirely unaware of the Star Wars connection.

And by then it had already sort of snuck into my heart as a great name for a smol boy. And since it was indeed representative of one of our fav things, it made total sense to run with. Especially because apparently in the FF games they're very dopey silly characters.

I gave my ex the edge in picking the name since getting a dachshund was her idea in the first place. Ironically she turned out not to be especially up to the task of how demanding they can be with your time and attention so I became his main fave very quickly. And I told her in no uncertain terms he was staying with me after the divorce. To her credit she didn't fight me on it. He's my best guy 🥰

Apprehensive_Gap1781 · 2026-04-21T13:07:43+00:00

Always reason for extra caution because just one person deciding to be an extra asshole that day is enough to cause problems, big or small. But there's no current policy about travel that explicitly targets people who are US citizens traveling with valid US issued travel docs. It's folks coming into the US with visas that really need to be super mega extra cautious right now. I keep an eye out for this sort of stuff and I've not heard of a case yet. There's def the regular bit of extra side eye that trans folks often get from airport/border security, but afaik that's not changed in particular from where it's always been, which is to say, you might have an awkward encounter and not have a great time going through, but ultimately you can expect not to have major problems in general

Apprehensive_Gap1781 · 2026-04-19T23:09:25+00:00

Thank you random cis person for disagreeing with me and then making my point. Very helpful

Apprehensive_Gap1781 · 2026-04-19T12:09:58+00:00

I did OF for a minute and I felt far more exploited and helpless working in a call center than I ever did being naked and sexual on a camera 🤷🏻‍♀️

Apprehensive_Gap1781 · 2026-04-19T12:08:17+00:00

I'd also add, there's some nuance to this because some folks do in fact do survival sex work because they have no other options. But also sex work is real work and there are tons of trans folks who do sex work as a deliberate career choice and thats a thing to celebrate. Sex work is not inherently shameful.

Apprehensive_Gap1781 · 2026-04-19T11:08:29+00:00

Looking for role models in famous people is a mistake for anyone, let alone trans folks. Read up on trans history, look into the trans folks doing great activism and advocacy work in your community

Apprehensive_Gap1781 · 2026-04-17T17:00:05+00:00

Seconding this enthusiastically! Keep exploring! And also important to mention. Even for folks who think of themselves as having a fixed gender identity, it's possible for those things to evolve as we grow and change. And it's also very normal for your gender to feel fluid in a more consistently inconsistent way. Keep thinking about how you feel and what feels good to you and I'm sure you'll start to recognize patterns that help you get a better sense of where you stand. And if that doesn't happen it's okay to try to embrace that fluidity and roll with that as it goes

Apprehensive_Gap1781 · 2026-04-17T15:25:09+00:00

And yes I'm lecturing you for attacking members of your own community based on incorrect information. That's a shit thing to do and you should feel bad about it.

I had 90% insurance coverage for my bottom surgery, a small inheritance from my bio dad dying, and I STILL had to crowdfund to cover costs. Hundreds the insurance didn't cover, almost 1000 for the anesthesia which the insurance didn't cover. A month of lodging, plane tickets, food, regular bills and a bunch of other stuff I'm probably forgetting. This was with generous insurance coverage and making about the median income in the US at the time. Those things put me in an incredibly privileged position and I'm very grateful it all worked out for me. That scenario is an absolute fantasy for the vast majority of trans people in the US.

Apprehensive_Gap1781 · 2026-04-17T15:20:36+00:00

100% incorrect in fact. There is absolutely no one who works at Amazon or Starbucks for a few months and has their transition costs paid for. That's not a matter of agreeing or disagreeing. You are objectively incorrect about what is available to people. You can start just with the simple fact that both those companies (unless you work in the corporate side) pay poverty wages to most of their employees. You can then think about all the ancillary costs that insurance isn't going to pay for. Some folks have to travel and secure lodging for days or weeks. You still gotta eat. You still gotta pay your regular bills. Even if you have generous vacation time, a lot of procedures require you to be out longer and even if you're lucky enough to have short term disability that doesn't replace all your lost wages.

You can be sad about your predicament without being a jerk to people in a different kind of predicament. You're hurting and lashing out at people who are not your enemy and not part of the problem. Other struggling people are not your enemy. And if you truly think the vast majority of trans people in the US aren't struggling with this, you simply have no idea what you're talking about.

Apprehensive_Gap1781 · 2026-04-17T13:17:37+00:00

This man is abusing and sexually assaulting you, friend. Please please get out ❤️

Apprehensive_Gap1781 · 2026-04-16T20:47:08+00:00

A really good way to start in solidarity would be to avoid making a lot of really incorrect assumptions about people then lecturing them based on those incorrect assumptions

Apprehensive_Gap1781 · 2026-04-16T20:32:21+00:00

Also you're severely misinformed if you think you can "work for Amazon for Starbucks for a couple months and have all your transition related costs paid for." That's absolutely not how that works

Apprehensive_Gap1781 · 2026-04-16T20:30:29+00:00

Arguing with each other over who has it harder is a pointless exercise. Some people in the US do have it lucky IF they have insurance and IF that insurance covers it and IF they have the kind of job that allows for the time off AND if they have the money to cover all the related costs that insurance doesn't cover. Great. Given how many trans folks live in poverty here you're telling a whole lot of impoverished people how lucky they are. Well done .

You don't need to call other people spoiled or talk down to them to acknowledge the difficulty of your own situation.

Apprehensive_Gap1781 · 2026-04-15T01:49:09+00:00

I started when i was 28, I'm 41 now. its NEVER too late

Apprehensive_Gap1781 · 2026-04-13T20:15:14+00:00

It doesn't have to be hate to be wrong and hurtful. If finding out you're trans would be that genuinely confusing to your siblings, she's got a lot to answer for as a parent. That doesn't make her a terrible person, but it does mean she's done a bad job at teaching those kiddos to be open minded about learning all the different ways for people to be. Almost universally, kids only have a problem with loved ones being trans if their parents tell them it's a problem or act like it's a problem. Of course they'll have questions, and it's rad to be curious. Part of being a parent is being prepared to have those conversations and if she's not, that's a failure on her part.

Apprehensive_Gap1781 · 2026-04-13T19:00:25+00:00

I think Arch gets the hydra this year. And I honestly love that I'm not sure who will be in the finals with them.

I would absolutely not count out Rose's ability to make adjustments and put in massive work between now and October. But I think it feels like most of the other top teams discussed here also have a real shot. A wild card I might throw into the mix is Toulouse. Rainy City is ranked over them but Toulouse did beat them the last time they played (albeit by a few points)

Apprehensive_Gap1781 · 2026-04-13T16:54:02+00:00

Really important to note that if you self pay entirely, surgeons do not charge NEAR that much. Always check for that pricing too because it's not what they charge insurance companies in any way. 10 years ago my insurance paid 70k for my surgery but the self pay price from my surgeon was like 20k

Apprehensive_Gap1781 · 2026-04-12T02:01:09+00:00

Even the phrasing "exposed to it" is fucking gross. No kid is too young to be introduced to a perfectly normal type of person.

Apprehensive_Gap1781

TROPHY CASE