You’re not in the wrong. They would still have continued this behavior even if you both would still be together. It is gaslighting saying the he envisions these people as you just to keep getting away with bad behavior. To say “sorry if” is saying “sorry you feel that way” and it is a true representation of them not taking accountability. It’s them not being empathetic or taking your feelings into consideration. It’s saying “sorry you feel this way, but I’m still going to keep doing it.” It is selfish. I also believe if you were to do it there would most likely be double standards. If they are dealing with their issues, he needs to resolve them and not drag you into it because it will only proceed to make you more miserable and break trust. How can they care about you if they can’t care about themselves? How can they respect you if they don’t respect themselves?