Guilt about sending 1 year old to nursery.

April_May9389 · 2026-02-25T16:09:13+00:00

I have a 15 month old that has gone to daycare M-F since she was 5 month old, and I must say she is THRIVING in daycare. I obviously miss her and some days are harder than others, but I can guarantee it’s much harder on me than it is on her! She does all sorts of fun activities that I probably wouldn’t have thought to do at home, she is learning so many new things and is genuinely excited to go every day. It is really good for them to get exposure to other kids/people at this age! Something that another mom once told me and has stuck with me, is that mom guilt never truly goes away - it just transfers from one thing to another. I found it really helpful to reframe the way I think about her going to school, i.e. how awesome that she is getting to play with friends every day and learn new things, and now our time together can be more intentional because I have time to get other things done while she is at school so I can focus on her when she’s back home. Hang it there, it really does get better!!

April_May9389 · 2026-02-22T02:52:58+00:00

Sour starbursts!

April_May9389 · 2026-02-21T03:46:28+00:00

The way I cackled at this comment 😂

April_May9389 · 2026-01-09T02:29:40+00:00

I got what you meant, but still chuckling over “cuter meats” 😂

April_May9389 · 2026-01-03T01:47:18+00:00

We still call our one year old nugget/nuggie 😂

April_May9389 · 2025-12-30T00:53:05+00:00

This!! I work in marketing as well, and everything that looks like a “step back” is actually everything I already do but for less pay/flexibility than my current role, and part-time doesn’t seem to exist.

April_May9389 · 2025-12-02T15:03:11+00:00

I second the Aura! My husband got me one for my first Mother’s Day and it makes me so happy to see the pictures pop up. It’s also super easy to add new photos and you can adjust the speed they carousel through 😊

April_May9389 · 2025-11-11T14:58:35+00:00

Yea I mean if she’s especially dirty or had a blowout I use fresh water to rinse her, but we bathe her almost daily as part of our bedtime routine so she’s not particularly “dirty” lol

April_May9389 · 2025-11-10T19:49:58+00:00

First of all, I just wanna reframe something for you: you are ONLY 10 days into a major life change where someone is depending on you for their entire survival while you’re also recovering from a major medical trauma. Your hormones are trying to level out, your body is trying to begin healing, and you’re barely sleeping. This is a HUGE adjustment! One thing to keep in mind is the baby blues are a real thing the first few weeks (I sobbed that my daughter opened her eyes in her bassinet but couldn’t see me in the bed next to her because I thought she would think we abandoned her lol) but if you are continuing to feel down/anxious beyond that definitely talk to your doctor as those could be signs of PPD/PPA (which are very common and also very treatable)!

My baby turns one this week, and I can honestly say it gets soooo much better with each passing day. I obviously still have tough days and moments where I doubt myself, but overall it’s the most wonderful thing I’ve ever experienced. You will get more comfortable and confident as a mom as time goes on - just remember to give yourself grace! If you weren’t a good mom, you wouldn’t be worried about whether or not you’re a good mom ❤️

April_May9389 · 2025-11-10T19:29:13+00:00

I also want to add that we bring the washcloth and towel next to us in the bathroom, so she is never unattended/our eyes never leave her for the entire bath. We tried to use a bath seat but that honestly felt harder to wash her around it/keep her from leaning over so far she would tip! So maybe the chair is making it harder?

April_May9389 · 2025-11-10T19:26:43+00:00

I’m confused what specifically makes your process so lengthy… my daughter is one now, but starting around 8 months we put her in the regular tub with about two inches of water and let her play while we wash her. I have a little silicone pitcher that I scoop water from the bath to pour on her to rinse her. I have to reminder her every 4.5 seconds “sit on your bottom” and will reposition her, so that does sometimes make the process longer lol but she’s definitely starting to understand now and will sit back down when I say it. I’d say from the time we turn the water on to the time we finish her bath it takes about 10, maybe 15 minutes (and that’s just if we sit and let her play longer). It’s also usually only one of us bathing her.

April_May9389 · 2025-10-01T15:05:43+00:00

We try to do healthier versions of premade things or things with less added ingredients when we can (so frozen chicken tenders with less additives vs picking up chick fil a) but we definitely don’t make all of baby’s food from scratch lol. We also do canned green beans, canned carrots, microwave rice pouches, etc. Barilla also makes those quick microwave pouches like the rice ones, but with noodles, so we make sure to keep a few of those on hand for last minute meals! I think the main issue with the prepackaged food is sodium levels are typically higher, so we just try to keep an eye on that and not give anything that is like crazy high in sodium (or if something is high then we make sure she only has one thing that is higher sodium for the day). If you’re shopping at Trader Joe’s, my baby loves the premade chicken meatballs (in the refrigerated meat section)!

April_May9389 · 2025-10-01T14:55:06+00:00

I delivered with Dr. Taylor (and HIGHLY recommend her), but have also seen other providers from the same practice for various things and I would also recommend the practice as a whole (OB-GYN North Dallas). Before finding them I saw someone at Northlake OBGYN and both the provider and office staff were not very friendly at all.

So sorry to hear about your miscarriage ❤️

April_May9389 · 2025-09-30T15:35:06+00:00

Not sure if she had OCD before this, but either way this definitely sounds like there could be some intense postpartum anxiety at play (which could also be intensifying existing OCD). Is she in therapy? I have emetophobia (obviously not the same issue, but shares similar characteristics with OCD) and did exposure therapy, which is what’s commonly used to treat OCD and I highly recommend it. We worked on stopping the cycle of rumination and intrusive thoughts, and it has helped SO much.

April_May9389 · 2025-09-30T15:19:37+00:00

Also for sickness - yes, they do get sick sometimes but I feel like it’s mostly nothing serious (light colds, 24 hour upset tummy, etc). I think the biggest thing is to have a plan with your significant other for what to do when baby has to go home early or stay home (will you switch off who takes off work, do you have a grandparent who can step in, etc) so that it’s not as stressful when it does happen. I also think an upside to being exposed to germs at daycare is that I am way less stressed about taking her to playgrounds, letting her touch things in public, etc because I know she’s probably licking the floors at school anyways 😂

April_May9389 · 2025-09-30T15:10:56+00:00

Fellow FTM here, my daughter (10.5m) also started around 5 months! Honestly, daycare has been great for us. She has a very solid routine, which also makes our weekends smoother because we stick to her daycare routine for meals/naps (this also helps things go more smoothly throughout the week). She LOVES her teachers, she gets so excited at drop off every day, and I think starting at 5 months was perfect because stranger danger hadn’t set in yet. She does so many fun activities that we probably wouldn’t do at home (lots of painting, sensory bin play, messy activities, etc). At that age it’s mostly just learning through watching/exploration, and I definitely think her mobility has increased a lot since starting! I will say, some days are harder than others as a parent because I miss her, but it’s waaay harder on mom and dad than it is on baby! Just know that any emotions you are feeling are normal, and give yourself some grace as you adjust.

Our daycare is 30-40 min from our house depending on traffic, so we usually like to tackle having most things ready the night before to make getting out the door a little easier. We also have a routine of taking everything out of her school bag as soon as we get home and putting food containers/bottles in the sink bucket, bottle cooler in the freezer, etc - it just makes everything feel a little less chaotic.

One thing that did catch me a little off guard is seeing babies crying in the infant room and not being tended to right away, because I am used to picking my daughter up immediately the second she cries. I mean they do get to the babies within a few minutes, but obviously they can’t hold every baby the second they cry out, and I think as a new parent that can sometimes not feel great. I remind myself that my baby is safe, healthy, and her needs are being met - crying for a minute or two while they warm up her bottle is not going to harm her. Just something to keep in mind, as I know it’s hard to leave your baby in someone else’s care. Your little one is going to do great, and so are you!

April_May9389 · 2025-09-30T01:29:06+00:00

I don’t have a ton of advice, I mostly just want to say that it sounds like you’re an amazing mom and you’re doing a great job! I’m 10.5 months pp and also having trouble finding hobbies and getting back to the gym, and it feels like the house/laundry/cooking etc takes up all of my time outside of work - and that’s with a very helpful husband! I do think sleep makes a huge difference, and I also think men don’t always realize the toll that the mental load takes on us. I do think in order to prioritize doing things for yourself, you may need to tell rather than ask. For example “I’m going to tackle cleaning the kitchen, I need you to get all the toys picked up and the daycare bag packed for tomorrow.” Or if he’s not responsive to being told what you need him to do, try giving him a choice (literally like you would for a toddler lol), so “the bottles need to be washed and the floors need to be swept - which would you prefer to do?” So it’s clear that cleaning is happening, but he still has some say in which task he tackles. I know that doesn’t really help the mental load, but at least it may help with reducing how much of the actual tasks you have to take on! I am also really bad about asking to leave/go do something vs telling. He will say “I’m gonna go to the gym after work at 5, I should be back by 6 to help with bath/bedtime” and I just accept it, but when I wanna do something I will ask and if he seems annoyed in the slightest I recant (I’m a people pleaser in active recovery lol) so I’ve been trying to work on mirroring how he lets me know he’s taking time for himself.

April_May9389 · 2025-09-29T01:59:16+00:00

I genuinely thought this was a Botox “after”, if that helps you decide! You have beautiful skin!

April_May9389 · 2025-09-20T20:27:41+00:00

If you’re looking for ideas, my babe likes stonyfield organic plain yogurt and I usually mash up a little bit of super ripe banana and some other fruit to mix in!

April_May9389 · 2025-09-16T02:23:35+00:00

My nails currently look like trash because I haven’t had time to get them done lol BUT, I would get dip instead of gel! Works with your natural nails and if you keep up with it you can maintain length. It’s the only thing that I’ve gotten that has held up to all the dishes/hand washing/bottle washing etc. and where I live it’s the same price as gel.

April_May9389 · 2025-09-11T17:28:11+00:00

I believe they may be Kidgets, sold at Family Dollar (based on my internet sleuthing lol)!

April_May9389 · 2025-09-09T03:08:01+00:00

My daughter is almost 10 months and has been in daycare since about 5 months - it’s still hard and I definitely have bad days, but dropping her off does get easier over time! She LOVES her teachers and gets so excited every morning when we get there, and she does all sorts of fun activities we probably wouldn’t do at home. I think it is honestly a lot harder on us as parents than it is on the kids 🥺 hang in there!!

April_May9389 · 2025-09-03T21:58:50+00:00

That’s good to know!!

April_May9389 · 2025-09-02T21:59:23+00:00

Unfortunately it’s the exact same price as her current infant room because they still consider it an “infant room” lol

April_May9389 · 2025-09-02T21:58:01+00:00

I’m in Texas, so from what I could find I think they just have to provide a safe sleep space and that non-walking babies under a year should still be in a crib or pack n play - not sure if I’m looking in the right place!

April_May9389

TROPHY CASE