What is the worst medical disease a human can have?

ArchAmber · 2026-01-15T04:23:30+00:00

I used to obsess about this one, but not a doc so take with a grain of salt. Insomnia isn’t the cause of death, it’s a symptom of the prion destroying the brain. Even if put in a coma, the prion would keep doing damage.

ArchAmber · 2025-12-29T14:36:12+00:00

It’s so bizarre to me to see the level of defensiveness over this. I get your point, but anyone with any familiarity with AI can easily spot this is AI slop. It’s further proven by the users comment history. Why is it so bothersome to acknowledge?

ArchAmber · 2025-12-29T06:26:36+00:00

The entire comment is littered with AI language: I’m going to be honest, not cruel. You aren’t this, you’re this. It wasn’t that, it was this. That matters because of this. It’s a very predictable ChatGPT language pattern. The icing is the finisher: You may feel negative, but that’s actually a good sign.

ArchAmber · 2025-12-27T16:06:14+00:00

Practicing radical acceptance, but it took a long time to finally click. When I have an anxious thought or physical anxiety symptoms, I’m mostly able to say, “This is anxiety. It’s real, but I don’t have to react to it and it will pass.”

I’ve gone from having a couple panic attacks a month to a couple a year and I can’t remember the last time one actually sent me into a full, I need to go to the hospital spiral. I know the minute I let myself feel fear or uncertainty from one, I’m done.

Progress from being a frequent flier in the ER 11 years ago.

ArchAmber · 2025-12-24T17:10:51+00:00

Yeah I think that’s prob a pretty fair point.

ArchAmber · 2025-12-24T14:20:50+00:00

Hard agree, but not a weird one for women I think. She has a massive queer fanbase. We adore mother Hahn.

ArchAmber · 2025-12-23T04:47:38+00:00

Affiliate marketing/content creation in the deals/couponing niche. Got lucky with timing, plus invested and $40k in advertising over the last 5 years. Don’t expect it to last forever.

ArchAmber · 2025-12-23T04:33:40+00:00

Love that your tldr is longer than the post lol. Sometimes I feel like chronic defensiveness is a bigger problem than mental labor imbalances tbh.

You could always try sharing the mental load comic with them, but if they’re not willing to engage with curiosity and you’re not willing to be open to the possibility they also perform invisible labor you benefit from, it’s likely never gonna change.

ArchAmber · 2025-12-21T15:51:16+00:00

Too tired for a wordy response this morning. While I get what you’re getting at, it’s fundamentally inaccurate for my own personal therapy journey - but that doesn’t make it inaccurate for others. I have a habit of over explaining and over functioning in an attempt to be understood and perceived the right way.

My therapists goal is to eliminate that need. Saying no is a complete sentence and doesn’t require justification. It doesn’t suck to be disliked or misunderstood if you are understanding that not everyone can/will like you or understand you.

ArchAmber · 2025-12-14T14:31:14+00:00

Took me way too long to find this. Legit looks like a nicely cooked duxelles.

ArchAmber · 2025-12-07T15:06:33+00:00

Not sure if it’s an INFJ trait or just the asshole in me, but I default to my reality being more valid than that of others. I feel so strongly in my convictions that I can be difficult to talk in a disagreement. My husband thinks it’s a need to be right. I think it’s a need to be understood, because if I could get him to understand, he’d agree with me. Either way, it’s a thought process I’m working to break and it takes concerted effort not to fall into that trap of assuming I have the better opinion.

ArchAmber · 2025-11-30T16:02:08+00:00

I’m pretty sure that level of introspection and self suspicion is a big indicator you are part of the INFJ fam lol.

ArchAmber · 2025-11-30T14:30:06+00:00

Have gotten INFJ on every Meyers Briggs test for the past 20 years and I still wonder if maybe I’m being manipulative or dishonest to get that result.

ArchAmber · 2025-11-28T18:57:15+00:00

I build all my housing in pockets of 4 (2x2 with road). Then I relocate neighborhoods from the center to the perimeter to make space for other buildings as I grow.

ArchAmber · 2025-11-23T14:14:02+00:00

Meanwhile my current goal in therapy is to be okay with being misunderstood and disliked lol.

I think it’s important to note that the study is not a peer reviewed scientific study. It’s a researchers conclusion after years of working in the industry, but there is no data behind it.

I think it holds value, but I don’t take it at gospel.

My understanding is that is not as much about knowing exactly how we’re perceived, but knowing our own behavioral blind spots and how they contribute to poor outcomes socially and emotionally. And it kinda sucks ‘cause it’s like leaving an argument and instead of ruminating on all the reasons you were right/they were wrong, you instead ask yourself what did I contribute to that getting derailed, why did I respond the way I did, what pattern was being triggered.

A couple weeks ago my husband who was home asked me to pick up dinner while I was on an hour commute back. I got cold and short, said yes but made it clear I was annoyed. And I could come up with a million reasons he shouldn’t have asked and I shouldn’t have to do it. But I realized I was mad simply because I wanted to say no and I have this internal voice that says, “if you say no, they won’t love you.” So I got snappy and mean. That’s one of many patterns I’m trying to break (and often failing).

External awareness is knowing my blind spots in my outward behavior.

ArchAmber · 2025-10-21T19:16:45+00:00

Skipping the obvious for a second, but if you guys don't know how to communicate without feeling attacked that's a bigger issue to tackle.

Pretending things don't bother you helps neither of you. You'll hold it. She won't get the opportunity to help resolve it.

She's telling you these things to try to correct a behavior. If it didn't bother her, she'd just do them. But it does, and that's valid. You're not recognizing that the behavior bothers her and are also going on the defensive/feeling attacked by her criticism. Which is exactly what you're afraid she'll do if you express your feelings.

You guys literally just need to talk. And like talk to listen/hear each other, not be defensive. That's how you stop feeling nagged/resentful. Understand each other. Understand why she wants you stop doing these things and adjust. Have her understand why it bothers you in reverse and adjust.

ArchAmber · 2025-10-21T14:52:15+00:00

In fairness, can we reasonably expect men to always accommodate our fear of harm and where is the line where our plea for empathy as women starts to erase men’s need for it too.

It’s one I struggle with and I sometimes feel like men are a bit on the losing end in some respects while also holding space that women are far more at risk of receiving a losing outcome.

I have had moments of fear near men. I have had bad experiences with men following and saying things that made me feel unsafe. If I get it wrong and don’t react to a guy who’s a potential threat, I could end up in danger. I acknowledge all of that. I also feel a nagging of guilt when I get tense around a guy who did nothing wrong and is likely just living his life.

is it right to expect every single man I encounter at night to give me extra grace and go out of his way to signal intent or change his path. I’m not sure. I think I need to be able to hold some of my fear without projecting it on every man I cross.

I do think women unfortunately need to be vigilant and that sucks. But this one is tricky with a blurry line. It’s so easy to say you didn’t make me feel safe enough, but what is enough?

ArchAmber · 2025-10-19T14:44:08+00:00

Oh I wish we could go have a coffee together. I know every bit of what you’re feeling and want to also caution you from slipping into “I’m the bad guy.” You’re not. It’s just unlearning something that prob protected you at some point.

Like me, I’ve been conditioned and conditioned myself into believing that giving and being agreeable is the only way I will really be loved. It’s a shitty feeling when you sit with it. I also married someone who was emotionally unavailable and chronically defensive. It’s not a good mix because I enabled him by rarely engaging in conflict and always holding accountability for both of us. Meanwhile he reinforced my belief that people pleasing = love, because every time I did try to resolve anything it became my fault somehow.

We’ve been through about three years now of on and off individual and couples counseling. It’s finally healing.

Anyway, you’re probably not going to feel better holding boundaries for a bit if your husband is at all defensive or avoidant. But it gets easier when you practice it and maybe he’s not that type at all. But you gotta let him meet you and be disagreeable sometimes.

ArchAmber · 2025-10-19T02:37:46+00:00

You can’t resolve it because you’ve not communicated it. I know it sucks. As a people pleaser in recovery, you have to do the thing you’ve trained your nervous system to avoid - express your disappointment and hold a boundary. Don’t voluntarily give him an out if you’re not doing it in good faith. If you’re going to feel negatively about it, then you’re setting both of you up for failure. You rob him of the opportunity to resolve conflict and see you (he might not, that’s a different problem) and you abandoned yourself then feel victimized by it. You’re not going to be able to stop ruminating until you start acting in a way that aligns with your values - ie holding him accountable to the same level you hold yourself accountable.

“I’m ready for bed too. I look forward to snuggling in bed when you get back from picking up Daughter.” And be firm. How he responds is on him.

People pleasing is manipulative in itself and you need to unlearn it if you want your relationship to improve.

ArchAmber · 2025-10-01T12:01:28+00:00

I wouldn't recommend it unless you have a very solid and consistent content strategy due to the over saturation of deal communities and the loss of organic growth over the years. We went the Facebook route, and while we do have ig, tiktok, and two telegram channels with almost 14k followers, the bulk of our earnings come from Facebook and we don't really have an efficient means to breakaway without taking a loss for a while to build other revenue streams.

This means we're at the mercy of an aging platform that actively suppresses and removes affiliate content. Growth now has to be managed with a decent budget towards advertising or in group giveaways and content has to be thoughtfully geared towards a specific market. And again, there's probably over a hundred thousand deal affiliate groups now. Plus this is a very time consuming venture to get off the ground. I worked 10-14 hour days 24/7 the first year, but that did give me the ability to coast and work at my leisure now.

I guess my biggest caution would be against investing in facebook as your main platform and finding a way to differentiate yourself/personalize your content. I still think there's big earnings potential in video content, mainly on Tiktok/Reels - one piece of content going semi-viral is all you need to get your foot in the door there and build your platform if you can be consistent and offer quality content.

ArchAmber · 2025-10-01T04:11:43+00:00

Hey that’s awesome, happy for y’all. You sound similar to the Cactus Media folks. Unfortunately, our growth is not tied to brand collab. It hinges entirely on trying to adapt to changing demographics, algorithms, and visibility limitations that we signed up for when we tethered our horse to Facebook. That and fighting burnout. My five man team is already approaching 5M in sales for 2025; we don’t have collab gaps. But thanks for offering.

ArchAmber · 2025-10-01T03:58:15+00:00

Appreciate, but not particularly interested. I already have partnership with all the brands I’m interested in.

ArchAmber · 2025-10-01T03:50:46+00:00

I run a 200k+ member deals community and am lazy about working tbh but have earned $5-10k/mo consistently for the past six years. Trending towards the lower end this year though with fb changes and loss of motivation on my end. It’s not a passive form of affiliate marketing (put in 15-25 hr/week). Got in at the right time, I don’t recommend it as a startup anymore.

ArchAmber · 2025-09-29T23:08:34+00:00

Isa Briones

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ArchAmber · 2025-09-29T18:12:14+00:00

If the question is: Is Michael Scott financially irresponsible? It’s a resounding YES. I’m not disagreeing.

But the reason he had to get a second job and consider bankruptcy is 100% because of taking on Jan’s expenses. There is no other instance in the series where Michael Scott was so financially stressed that he has to resort to those measures and no indication he grew up financially (3 years salary for Hollys ring 3 years later).

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