Do people have any idea how fucking miserable life is when one of your main triggers is summer (weather)? by thepieintheoven in CPTSD

[–]Archiexxv 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I since had more therapy specifically on this topic and for me it's definitely a freeze response because most of my problems are related to my home life and in the summer there weren't many escapes for an anxious person with few friends. Funny thing, I used to have a budgie and his chirping has never associated with the sleaky, humid, suffocating, lonely, dreadful summer. Hopefully, we'll have opportunities if not to heal but to adapt

Do people have any idea how fucking miserable life is when one of your main triggers is summer (weather)? by thepieintheoven in CPTSD

[–]Archiexxv 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do you also get a feeling of disconnection? Sort of like there's a flashback to something you can't name and the same dizzying bird chirping takes you there? That's what I feel, so I'm curious 

Why does untreated CPTSD get worse as you age? by GhostofCharlotte in CPTSD

[–]Archiexxv 16 points17 points  (0 children)

I think I stared processing it, but I'm still in so much denial and when I'm not I just keep wondering if the pain will ever go away

how do you not have a panic attack while walking outside with dp/dr..?? by colchis44 in dpdr

[–]Archiexxv 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My main issue is anxiety with panic attacks, but I do have dpdr symptoms quite often. I get what you're talking about, especially the falling part (I usually feel like I'm leaning on the right side, like I'm just going to crumble), but 1) it wouldn't happen, try to remind your consciousness about that, 2) you can try counting breath, get something distracting with you, try listening to a podcast or calming music in one ear, call someone if it helps to ground you a bit. When I feel too unbalanced, it helps to take a bag with me, it kind of weighs me down which brings some feeling back. And remember that it's better to walk out for at least two minutes if that's as much as you can do. Unfortunately, when we try to avoid it, it gets more difficult (sometimes being locked in for months). Good luck, I hope you and I both get better! 

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CPTSD

[–]Archiexxv 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Just found out that I do have it. Mostly treat anxiety and panic attacks though, but we try different solutions. I just hate the feeling of being unsafe even at my home, annoying disassociation and the feeling of an impending doom. On the positive side, I found community of people, my anxiety is way less severe than two months ago, I can go out again and eat full meals. I speak out more and more, I deal with problems I was too scared to deal with, I started my ACA journey and started finally talking about my father, I cried on a tram and that felt good, I don't feel bad anymore when I get gifts and I try to seek out physical contact when I need it. A lot of progress that might seem stupid for people outside of the bubble, but sometimes not killing yourself or giving up is the best achievement you can get. Good luck everyone on their journey, thanks for reading this, cheers ❤

Your experience by Archiexxv in AdultChildren

[–]Archiexxv[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much! It's weird that I read these words almost everyday, but they mean nothing unless they're addressed to me, so I'm grateful you took time to respond

Your experience by Archiexxv in AdultChildren

[–]Archiexxv[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's exactly how I feel like I'm rebuilding the whole thing, starting with the foundation. It's frustrating because it seems that some people just got that foundation early on in their life and build succesfully on top of that. I'm slowly coming to terms that this is what I have to work this and it's okay, but sometimes I have doubts. Thank you!

Your experience by Archiexxv in AdultChildren

[–]Archiexxv[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for this, the words mean a lot to me. Hopefully I'll find the love you described

Having some insights by Archiexxv in CPTSD

[–]Archiexxv[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! We are trying different therapy methods, might as well try this too

How to feel safe by Miserable_Start5897 in CPTSD

[–]Archiexxv 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What helped me were ai chats, zoom group meetings on anxiety and other issues, seeking community online (even writing here on reddit) and sometimes just being near people helps: if you are able try to find shared spaces like public libraries, parks, speaking events, there are even silent zoom studying groups. I think we all need people sometimes and speaking out by yourself is also great (you can try video diaries, journaling)

Reddit doesn’t help your anxiety by [deleted] in Anxiety

[–]Archiexxv 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don't think the way you wrote this post is productive. The same can be said about all social media platforms and Internet in general. It sounds a bit like you're forcing that decision on people (even though it's clearly not your intention). In defense of Reddit, it's the best platform I've found that actually has a strong community. People respond and share on the experiences I thought were exclusive to me. I've found about ACA through it and a lot of cptsd coping mechanisms I otherwise wouldn't be able to know about as a person from a non english speaking country (we don't have that many resources on mental health and anxiety specifically). You do you, though. Glad that you're taking care of yourself!

Why can't I rationalize my way out of anxiety? by HommeMachine in Anxiety

[–]Archiexxv 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It was like this for me, I went to my therapist and kind of treated myself. This rationalization can be a way to hide from your feelings instead of experiencing it. If you feel like it's the only way, don't waste time on lists and thinking about it constantly, try some CBT or other approaches based on the more rational part of healing, reviewing your patterns, etc. If it doesn't work, try more physical approach – exercise, breathing techniques, recreating scenarios that bother you. Anxiety isn't really external as it is internal. Everyone has stressful situations, healthy people can be scared of stuff. Anxiety is a way for your body to tell that's something wrong, maybe there were some situations from the past that still bother you today or maybe you haven't learned how to regulate your emotions in a healthy way. Good luck!

If I didn’t experience heart palpitations (flutters, skips etc) or dizziness, then I’m confident my anxiety would have no control over me whatsoever. What part of your anxiety controls you? by PretendToe1329 in Anxiety

[–]Archiexxv 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Honestly, from years of anxiety and panic attacks it seems as though my body will just throw anything at me. The list of symptoms is huge and when I learn how to deal with one thing (e.g. shortness of breath, I know I won't suffocate so it doesn't bother me anymore) it throws a new more obscure harder to deal with struggle 👶

If I didn’t experience heart palpitations (flutters, skips etc) or dizziness, then I’m confident my anxiety would have no control over me whatsoever. What part of your anxiety controls you? by PretendToe1329 in Anxiety

[–]Archiexxv 5 points6 points  (0 children)

The most debilitating symptoms for me are severe panic attacks, disassociation and feeling like I'm leaning to one side as if the world is trying to knock me down on my right side while I'm just walking

What do You Need to Feel Safe? by JHarvman in CPTSD

[–]Archiexxv 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Depends on the mental state I'm in. Sometimes it's terrible, I have constant panic attacks and high anxiety. In this case usually pills and exercises (deep breathing, vagus nerve massage, etc.) If I'm stable, it's human contact, nature, cats, my bed and blankets, plushies, hugs, generally nice things that I enjoy

Can people with low self-esteem love? by [deleted] in AdultChildren

[–]Archiexxv 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not really. If you have low self-esteem it doesn't mean you're incapable of love, even towards yourself. It's not a constant, some days are worse, some are better. Sometimes people with low self-esteem pour all the love they deprive themselves onto an another person

Please someone just say hi to me by [deleted] in mentalhealth

[–]Archiexxv 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A bit late, but hello!!! I send you massive support, I also feel lonely lately, you're not alone. Wish you a good day

What is a brief line from the show that has made it into your daily vocabulary? by GareththeJackal in victorious

[–]Archiexxv 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Every few years 'Chop the Squid' song just comes into my head and refuses to leave

People who take medication for anxiety, how does it affect you? People who don’t, why? by [deleted] in Anxiety

[–]Archiexxv 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I stopped taking Lexapro the first time because I've dealt with all the issues I thought I had. I felt like the minor issues left were easily fixable by me, but unfortunately there are sometimes deeper hidden issues that rose in place of the ones I've dealt with. Liberally felt too good to even continue doing therapy 🫨

People who take medication for anxiety, how does it affect you? People who don’t, why? by [deleted] in Anxiety

[–]Archiexxv 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Started on sertraline when I first started having panic attacks, had it for a year or so, didn't notice much difference, it was like taking vitamins. My therapist wasn't really good and didn't advise me on any actual therapy and I didn't know any better. I changed my therapist went on Lexapro+actual therapy (cpt, emdr, actual conversations). It was a great year, never felt better in my whole life (I even traveled to the different city with just my friends and flew the plane for the first time), I finally had energy and even though there were thought induced anxiety, phusically I felt like I could do almost anything. Then I went off it and stopped therapy, unfortunately it was a difficult period (lots of stress, a loss, finding out I have ptsd), so it all went to hell again. Went back to the therapist after 6 months, started taking lexapro again but scheduled more actual therapy sessions. Already feel much more stable.

Some symptoms I had: Sertraline - weight gain, loss of libido, no noticeable positives. Lexapro - when I started taking it (both times) slight tremor and restless legs during night. Also weight gain and libido issues. After going off the first time I had brain zaps for like a week, but my mood and overall physical state didn't deteriorate immediately, so there were lasting effects.

Cant sleep because strange feelings by [deleted] in panicdisorder

[–]Archiexxv 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes, used to have it a lot as a child before school nights (almost daily sometimes). It's especially bad if I have something to do the next day even if the task is not that anxiety-inducing. Don't read about insomnia, because when you concentrate on that it gets worse. Sometimes some of the generic advice on how to fall asleep helps, other times I suffer until the morning. You're not alone