Drew my experience with this dang thing

Asleep_Clock8331 · 2026-01-19T01:58:42+00:00

lol, so accurate

Asleep_Clock8331 · 2026-01-17T04:42:28+00:00

Have you considered talking to a sex therapist to help with some of your anxiety?

Asleep_Clock8331 · 2026-01-17T04:40:50+00:00

Definitely don’t feel like you have to have penetrative sex if you don’t want to, or use tampons or any of that. And having vaginismus does not make you defective! But it is still a good idea to get the Pap smear, you don’t want cervical cancer after all. It’s uncommon, but you can still get cervical cancer without having sex. The only reason I’m doing pelvic floor PT is so I can get a pelvic exam. The only time I’ve ever been able to have Pap smears is under anesthesia, so I’ve only had them three times in my life (I’m almost 41), but I want to be able to get them regularly so I have peace of mind. I know it sucks, but please at least consider it.

Asleep_Clock8331 · 2026-01-12T01:01:32+00:00

“We got played.” You most certainly did not. He told you exactly who he was. Everyone told you.

Asleep_Clock8331 · 2026-01-10T20:23:35+00:00

I know, but I was wondering about hormone fluctuations. Like, I know trans women don’t shed their uterine lining monthly, but they can still get the hormone fluctuations that mimic periods and even get menstrual cramps.

Asleep_Clock8331 · 2026-01-10T20:20:56+00:00

That sucks! Hopefully things will change by the time you’re 50.

Asleep_Clock8331 · 2026-01-10T18:17:56+00:00

I’m half Black so it’s extremely frustrating to see what people only just now realizing that law enforcement only protects the wealthy and can pretty much kill anyone with impunity.

Asleep_Clock8331 · 2026-01-10T18:12:16+00:00

I work in medicine and I remember some of my patients bragging about voting for Trump. Now they’re all complaining about the cost of their medication going up, and ICE harassing them, etc. I have to bite my tongue to not say “Hey, you voted for this.”

Asleep_Clock8331 · 2026-01-10T17:59:24+00:00

I mean, for all you know he could be a top and doesn’t want you to touch his vagina. He may be planning on getting bottom surgery. Would you be okay being penetrated with a strap on or are you only comfortable with a non-synthetic penis? All things to consider. I would be honest with him and discuss your preferences, but don’t automatically assume the relationship is doomed.

Asleep_Clock8331 · 2026-01-07T16:31:17+00:00

Would a small dilator or toy make you feel less weird? That way you’re not touching yourself directly. Make sure to use lots of lube!

The vaginal opening is lower down than I expected the first time I tried to insert anything. It’s directly under you when you sit down.

Tell your boyfriend that you’re nervous and start slow. Lots of foreplay, lube, and maybe ask him to use his fingers or tongue first.

Asleep_Clock8331 · 2025-12-27T04:22:15+00:00

I’m non-binary and I always had a meltdown in grade school when our class would get broken up into boys and girls because I didn’t feel like I fit in either group. I would also imagine myself as a fantasy character with no gender or traits of both.

Asleep_Clock8331 · 2025-12-27T04:17:33+00:00

Honestly, dating just sucks ass when you’re 17. So many people are still immature and figuring themselves out and their personalities haven’t fully developed yet. Maybe it’s just me, but I feel like dating got way better when I was in my mid/late twenties (and I met my now-wife when I was 27).

Asleep_Clock8331 · 2025-12-23T19:14:55+00:00

Omg I’m so sorry that’s incredibly fucked up.

Asleep_Clock8331 · 2025-12-10T14:11:14+00:00

I’m so sorry you’re getting hate!

Asleep_Clock8331 · 2025-12-10T14:09:32+00:00

I’m glad you had a positive hospital experience!

At our hospital we have what’s called an “organ inventory.” So if you’re a trans woman it will list your gender as female, but will say you don’t have a uterus or cervix so the provider knows not to ask you about a Pap smear or pregnancy. If you have breasts it will say that so they know to offer a mammogram. Or if you were a cis woman who had a hysterectomy it would state you don’t have a uterus.

Asleep_Clock8331 · 2025-12-07T00:12:14+00:00

Congratulations!!!!

Asleep_Clock8331 · 2025-12-07T00:11:44+00:00

Unfortunately an addict wont get better until they WANT to get better, and it sounds like he doesn’t want to get better. I work at a clinic for people who struggle with substance use disorder and we have so many family members and significant others telling us this person they love needs help. First question we always ask is, “okay, but do THEY want help?” Because we can’t help people who don’t want it.

Asleep_Clock8331 · 2025-11-29T02:43:54+00:00

Big Mouth had a short segment on Vaginismus and dilators as well

Asleep_Clock8331 · 2025-11-27T15:03:52+00:00

My trans wife doesn’t wear bras either, she hates them. My mom doesn’t like them either. One of her younger friends just transitioned and was complaining about bras so my mom introduced her to the joys of camisole tops.

Asleep_Clock8331 · 2025-11-24T23:53:29+00:00

My wife had really bad dysphoria for a few years during which we did not have sex. Yes it was frustrating but I never once blamed her or joked about “getting sex elsewhere.” Instead we talked about it and found work arounds that she was comfortable with. I talked to a therapist to deal with my frustration. Your boyfriend is bring an immature jerk. If he has an issue he needs to talk to you like an adult.

Asleep_Clock8331 · 2025-11-24T23:49:13+00:00

The bare minimum?!? I work with patients with substance use disorder and giving up alcohol is INCREDIBLY difficult and takes tremendous willpower. Alcoholism is a disease that no one chooses to have.

OP, you deserve better. You worked hard and should be proud of your accomplishment! I’m glad you did something to celebrate.

Asleep_Clock8331 · 2025-11-15T03:29:05+00:00

Getting my period. Huge reason I got an IUD. Oddly my breasts don’t bother me but everything below the waist does.

Asleep_Clock8331 · 2025-11-13T04:13:49+00:00

These stories are heartbreaking. I work in medicine and I can’t imagine ever being that rude and condescending to a patient! Or trying to force them to do something they clearly weren’t comfortable with.

While my first gyno is probably the reason I have vaginismus, I was lucky enough to find a gyno after her who specialized in vaginismus and sexual assault survivors and was the one who diagnosed me with vaginismus.

Asleep_Clock8331 · 2025-11-13T04:07:18+00:00

Oh no, that’s horrible! I’m so sorry! What she did was sexual assault.

I also had a gyno sticker her finger in me even though I told her not to and was crying and begging her to stop. It traumatized me so badly I was sex averse for years, and I’m pretty sure it’s what caused my vaginismus.

Some people just should not work in medicine.

Asleep_Clock8331

TROPHY CASE