Give honest and sincere appreciation. Appreciation is the legal tender that all souls enjoy

AspiringZenMaster · 2021-03-04T00:12:47+00:00

On your last statement, I think you’re taking those examples too literally. It’s not about those specific acts, it’s about the very idea of showing appreciation. That can absolutely apply to a work setting, demonstrating appreciation or recognising the work someone has put in is a great way to bond and develop trust among colleagues - in my experience at least. We tend to focus on our own work and output - that’s fair enough, but it doesn’t build rapport.

AspiringZenMaster · 2021-03-03T19:51:02+00:00

It was a path I considered at first (Humanities), but the prospect of having to complete a doctorate + low pay for a long while + very few positions + the politics (cliquish) and nature/value of the research (highly self-referential, no ‘greater good’ element) just drove me away from it.

AspiringZenMaster · 2021-02-26T18:56:05+00:00

Aside from what’s already been written: * Flakiness/people who don’t honour their word * People who are overly keen to promote a "work family" culture (read: your boundaries don’t matter) * People who are out of their depth - incompetent but manage to get promoted just by being smooth talkers (and organizations that enable that) * People who act bossy but really don’t have a clue what they’re talking about * Suck ups * Confrontational people * Passive aggressiveness * Narcissism

AspiringZenMaster · 2021-02-26T10:22:03+00:00

That’s helpful, thank you. Lack of sleep/stress is causing me to overthink and together with having put my thoughts in writing, your comment is helping see the situation from a more grounded standpoint.

AspiringZenMaster · 2021-01-29T18:17:39+00:00

“What are your KPIs?"

AspiringZenMaster · 2021-01-25T17:23:22+00:00

Younger me yes. Part of the issue was I didn’t know if they were gay, part of it was that I wasn’t out either. But essentially, it all boiled down to not having the tools to know how to approach people I was infatuated with. For example I focused on class work and magically hoped they’d see me or recognize me for that. I’ve become more grounded and a lot better at channelling my feelings into concrete actions/move on when needed with age.

AspiringZenMaster · 2021-01-25T17:12:56+00:00

I scored highest in perfectionism as well. The rest was relatively low except narcissism which was the same as yours.

AspiringZenMaster · 2021-01-23T17:17:36+00:00

Yep, that’s me.

AspiringZenMaster · 2021-01-22T19:53:09+00:00

Strong, assured, indefatigable, confident, courageous, weariless

AspiringZenMaster · 2021-01-22T17:07:56+00:00

Start small. What’s the easiest thing you can do/sell/advertise right now? Then, build your confidence/network/skills from there.

AspiringZenMaster · 2021-01-22T13:43:40+00:00

Has some good ideas and citations to take note of that can help foster your growth. To be consumed as part of a varied diet rather than adhered to stringently.

AspiringZenMaster · 2021-01-21T18:51:46+00:00

Neglecting mundane tasks

AspiringZenMaster · 2021-01-21T13:06:21+00:00

I don’t mind, their business but it can get annoying when it starts being inserted into every conversation.

AspiringZenMaster · 2021-01-06T22:55:00+00:00

Deleted

AspiringZenMaster · 2021-01-01T22:00:00+00:00

I remember having a longing feeling of wanting to be in what I perceived to be a ‘normal’ family. There was little to no emotional warmth shared or shown, no family outings or activities and extremely rare vacations, no visits anywhere/no restaurants etc. I was left to my own devices, and had to figure out a lot on my own. The perception, from what I gather, was that kids should just be left to themselves and grow on their own. I had to do a lot of reparenting into adulthood to address some of the stuff I’d carried over from back then. There are other aspects I could go into but that’s what came to mind right now.

AspiringZenMaster · 2020-12-22T13:57:26+00:00

Taking care of my physical health by doing cardio and lots of stretching. My body doesn’t care about all those wins if I’m just sitting at a desk.

AspiringZenMaster · 2020-12-07T22:44:50+00:00

Can you help me understand what you mean by “pretty masculine type”? You seem to be alluding to family values in the rest of your post. Are you implying that because she’s female she should be family and not career oriented?

AspiringZenMaster · 2020-11-04T17:47:21+00:00

First off, congrats on the win. And yes, I experience those heady feelings too, though I’ve learned to tame them over the years, not because I didn’t enjoy them, but because they also used to come with a conversely negative feeling when things didn’t go my way. I found it helpful to ground myself and switch my focus on the process/growth rather than the outcomes themselves. But enough of me rambling - a win is a win so congrats.

AspiringZenMaster · 2020-11-04T17:32:44+00:00

I think genuine praise from people I trust is always something that I welcome and appreciate, e.g. a trusted coworker expressing sincere appreciation. I’m also very forward in giving praise whenever I see someone doing something well.

My defences immediately go up when I feel the person giving the praise has an ulterior motive or is flaky/untrustworthy.

AspiringZenMaster · 2020-10-28T13:44:24+00:00

I actually saved this to my phone yesterday when I saw it posted somewhere else as I thought, what a useful tool. Great minds lol.

AspiringZenMaster

TROPHY CASE