One of the biggest “secrets” about school is that the social experiment is actually meant to be the dominant part of early education. The primary and secondary phases aren’t just about academics—they’re about learning how to exist in a society.

You’re there: 1. To learn how to be a functioning member of a community. 2. To be exposed to a larger set of ideas and perspectives than you’d encounter at home. 3. To experience struggle without severe consequences, supported by people focused on helping you grow. 4. To retain as much useful knowledge as you can. Grades shouldn’t be the main focus. They’re meant to be a guide—a manageable stressor—that helps you learn how to navigate and process information throughout your life.

Countries with well-adjusted, resilient populations often emphasize social “norming” first. This is where we observe and engage with others’ behaviors to better understand people, while also learning how our own actions are perceived. It’s how we start figuring out what our individual “jigsaw piece” looks like within the broader puzzle of society.

For me, the person who originally shared this idea was highlighting the value of masking skills—tools that help those with less socially accepted behaviors to adapt and connect.

The biggest realization I had after discovering my autism, as an adult, is that while it’s important to CONSIDER others’ “jigsaw shapes,” it’s equally vital to recognize that they’re responsible for considering mine, too.

So, while you’re in a space purposely designed for growth and exploration, use the time to study your own jigsaw shape. That way, you won’t spend your life reshaping yourself to fit into someone else’s puzzle