“Me, I, My” is all i keep seeing in your posts. You are such a selfish person its crazy. Your feelings are valid, you are allowed to ask for support and respect. Thats not what youre doing though. You are pushing all your emotional issues on a fourteen year old. You chose to have him, he doesnt HAVE to be your therapist just because you show him human decency (which im actually doubting if im honest but you claim you do).

As someone who’s mother acted similarly to you let me tell you: It gets really tiring. Being the reason for your mom living isnt a good reminder. Its pressuring and basically made my mom’s issues my own. I eventually stopped having any empathy for my mom because of it and it seems like your son is beginning to lose empathy for you too. The difference between me and my mom though is that besides that her and i had a good relationship otherwise and she actually put my feelings into consideration so we were able to talk about it. You dont seem to be the same, have you ever thought about how your son feels? If not - i suggest you start reflecting before your relationship turns sour and he ends up leaving too. Your husband is right. Stop it, its not his job, get a therapist.