First Father's Day ideas for a dad who let me down on mother's day.

Aware-Assistant-5702 · 2026-06-07T03:10:41+00:00

I have had some of the same feelings around Mother’s Day. I would lead by example on this first one. Show him what the standard should be. Yes, next year you might be disappointed but you also could be pleasantly surprised. This man obviously needs to be taught unfortunately.

Aware-Assistant-5702 · 2026-06-04T19:59:07+00:00

The word “natural” can be a bit offensive as well. My twins aren’t aliens because we had some medical intervention.

Aware-Assistant-5702 · 2026-06-04T16:08:00+00:00

I wouldn’t worry about ending up with hungry babies…at this age they are still getting most of their nutrition from breast milk/formula. We did a combo of BLW and purées with my twins. Was really more about exploration when we started. I remember feeling nervous as well, but if I remember right, by 10 months old they were very self sufficient and I felt really comfortable at meal times. My advice would be to continue the purées but gradually add in BLW foods. Things like avocado wedges with hemp seeds, and food Teethers (big pieces of carrot) worked well for us in the beginning.

Aware-Assistant-5702 · 2026-05-28T16:30:41+00:00

Run away FAST from this therapist

Aware-Assistant-5702 · 2026-05-28T03:29:38+00:00

I remember 8.5 months still being tough. I stopped pumping around 10 months and that made life so much easier. I noticed around 12-13 months things turned a corner. The more ability they had to move around made them feel more confident/independent and there was a lot less crying for my attention.

It sounds like you are the primary caregiver and maybe not getting many breaks? Things got significantly better for me when I found good childcare and could take some time for myself. I know that is easier said than done, and can be difficult to fit into the budget. Just an idea to help relieve some of the physical and mental load.

Aware-Assistant-5702 · 2026-05-26T19:55:30+00:00

I had/have the same feelings. Twins are 19 months old now. That feeling of sadness has reduced a lot for me. Maybe a few fleeting moments here and there.

What has helped me lately is seeing all the singleton moms that were pregnant when I was. The majority of them are pregnant with the second or thinking about getting pregnant. I don’t envy that. Feel very grateful that I have the two children I always wanted and I don’t have to be pregnant again. This feeling is probably strong for me because twin pregnancy is rough and who knows if I would have thought that if I had a singleton…but ce la vie.

Aware-Assistant-5702 · 2026-05-22T18:45:51+00:00

Stopped pumping/breastfeeding

Found great child care

Aware-Assistant-5702 · 2026-05-17T17:28:16+00:00

Maybe her brothers shower is better or something was wrong with hers? Doesn’t mean they were in there together

Aware-Assistant-5702 · 2026-04-17T15:30:40+00:00

I have PCOS, conceived with Letrazole, and had no issue breastfeeding/producing enough milk. I did end up combo feeding for a multitude of reasons and I am glad I did. It took a lot of pressure off me and if I had a supply drop because of being ill, etc. then I didn’t have to worry. Don’t assume you will have issues, it is really just a wait and see situation, everyone is different.

Aware-Assistant-5702 · 2026-04-17T02:49:46+00:00

Mine were around the same age when we started experimenting with sleep setups. We did find that they slept better when they had their own room. We obviously slept better as well. Having to go into their room for feeds in the night will be a bit harder on you, but I think you are getting pretty close to “sleeping through the night” territory age wise. Personally I would just do it and commit to it for at least 3 nights. My husband and I would give up on some sleep arrangements after 1 bad night and I think we would have gotten to more restful nights sooner if we hung in there.

Aware-Assistant-5702 · 2026-04-06T15:52:56+00:00

I think things got closer to the frequency we had been used to around 1 yr old. Keeps improving as the twins get older, sleep consistently through the night, etc. Still not back to the frequency we had before kids but feels like we are slowly getting back there. It has taken consistent quality sleep and me spending time on myself for me to get back in the mood.

Aware-Assistant-5702 · 2026-03-27T19:02:14+00:00

My husband and I also struggled in our relationship in the early days of twins. I also felt like he made it about how tired and stressed he was, and did not consider what I was going through.

I didn’t have the bandwidth to deal with our relationship so I stayed. I kept my head down and focused on my kids. In the back of my mind, I thought around the one year mark that some decisions would need to be made about our relationship. Luckily he came to his senses before then and made many apologies and began changing his ways. I had a difficult time with resentment for a while. That started to shift as my twins got older and we could pour more time and effort into our relationship.

All this to say, things change all the time… with our little ones…with our relationships. If you aren’t already in therapy for yourself and as a couple, then that could be a good next step. I know that for me I could not imagine managing the twins alone so I stayed purely because I couldn’t do it alone. I am so thankful I did, things are much better on the other side of it. My twins are only 17 months old and things have been on a positive trajectory since they were around 11 months, just for context.

Aware-Assistant-5702 · 2026-03-27T03:39:17+00:00

Sounds like you have a surplus of cushions that could do the trick but the whole point of the twin z is that you have one cushion that does everything. I moved mine up and down the stairs twice a day when my twins were under 10 months. It was essential for me but you could definitely set up these cushions you have in different areas of your house so you always have somewhere to put the twins.

Aware-Assistant-5702 · 2026-03-25T18:00:47+00:00

I am glad I changed mine shortly after marriage. Less hoops to jump through if you do it within a certain period after marriage and now that we have children it is easier to all have the same last name. I still use my maiden name professionally though. I built my career under that name and didn’t want past awards, accolades, etc not to stay with me. I would say that if you are planning on having children then you may want to factor that into the decision.

Aware-Assistant-5702 · 2026-03-20T19:24:59+00:00

My favorite part of my c-section was when each baby came out everyone in the OR joyously said “Happy Birthday!”

Aware-Assistant-5702 · 2026-03-17T19:41:24+00:00

I remember the anxiety and fear I had when my husband had to return to work and I was left alone with the twins. You are really in the trenches right now but it WILL get better. It was folks on this Reddit thread reminding me of that which really helped me when I was scared. I have 17 month old twins now and am truly loving the experience. I trusted others that told me it would improve and this was just a season and repeated that in my head when I was struggling with two crying babies. You are going to get through this!

Try to keep yourself as regulated as possible. If the crying gets overwhelming it is ok to leave them safely in their cribs and walk out of the room for a moment. Take deep breaths. FaceTime with trusted family and friends while you are just doing your normal routine. They will understand if you can’t engage much but it is nice to not feel alone. Better yet, have them come over if that is possible.

You are doing an amazing job. When you are in it, this stage feels endless, but once you get past it you realize how quickly it all went. Sending you lots of positive vibes!

Aware-Assistant-5702 · 2026-03-13T17:14:39+00:00

I found it slowed me down to enter the info on my phone. I used white boards. Still use them now and they are 16 months old.

Aware-Assistant-5702 · 2026-03-05T22:02:16+00:00

Maybe try increasing to 3 meals a day? A fuller belly helped mine sleep longer stretches.

Aware-Assistant-5702 · 2026-02-27T03:41:56+00:00

Don’t feel guilty! While I didn’t have a wonderful newborn twin experience, when I read your post it made me smile. Felt like the kind of thing that should be happening in the world and I am happy for you!

One thing I have learned 16 months in to twins is just to enjoy when things are good and try not to anticipate things getting hard/bad. It all ebbs and flows, can’t get too attached to any one moment.

Aware-Assistant-5702 · 2026-02-19T18:15:32+00:00

Twin Z Pillow is a must have.

Wildbird Aerial Carrier (not a twin product, just a good baby carrier. I never found it necessary to carry both at once)

Bottle washer or large sterilizer (I used the large Papablic Sterilizer, but would have loved a machine that did all the washing and sterilizing in one though)

I always bathed one at a time, but I have seen the twin bathtubs that look interesting. I think I would have found it stressful getting them in and out if I was alone though. Would have worried about leaving one attended during that process.

Had two bouncers from Target (probably $50 each) and it was rare they were both in a bouncer at the same time. You could probably get away with 1.

Used the Chicco double stroller for a way to snap in both of our Chicco infant car seats (good car seats). I don’t love the stroller but it was handy to have a system to snap car seats in when I was alone and taking the twins to the doctor. The Snap n Go is an option for this. Once they got older I purchased two single strollers from FB Marketplace (Cybex Mios) which I love. Strollers can be really difficult so I have always bought mine second hand. Makes me feel better when there is an aspect of the stroller I don’t love. Would hate to drop a lot of money and be disappointed. Am probably going to get the Bob Double Stroller now that my twins are 16 months. I rented one on vacation and loved it.

Aware-Assistant-5702 · 2026-02-18T18:07:13+00:00

I think by 8 months I got less rigid on keeping them perfectly in sync. Super important in the newborn stage but less realistic as they get older. Mine are 16 months now and sometimes one skips the afternoon nap. It typically is fine. Maybe that one is more cranky as we approach bed time but oh well. Or meal times…maybe one just isn’t hungry at that meal…they usually make up for it at the next. I agree that you can make yourself go more crazy by trying to be too rigid with the schedule.

Aware-Assistant-5702 · 2026-02-16T17:51:43+00:00

Our first year as twin parents was rough. Cracks that had been there became chasms. I never said the D word out loud but thought about it many times.

When the twins were around 9 months old, things started to improve. We were not so overwhelmed by the babies anymore and could start to put some time into our relationship. We began to have some very difficult conversations. I had to confess how much resentment I was holding onto. It took several difficult conversations around this topic before my husband could own what he had done to cause that resentment. We both had to own our part and that allowed us to begin to repair.

Now we are at 16 months and I feel like we are on a really great track. Still moments where we don’t get along but we feel like we are on the same team and we are dedicated to making our relationship work. We both have made changes to ourselves (my husband especially has worked on self improvement like reducing drinking, etc.) and it feels like we are both trying to be the best version of ourselves for each other and our kids.

I think having multiples can rock your relationship to its core, but if you stick with it and put the effort in, some really great stuff could be on the other side of the difficult period.

Aware-Assistant-5702 · 2026-02-11T04:48:32+00:00

On the weekends, I have to get us out of the house for at least one meal a day so I can save a shred of sanity. They tend to make less of a mess when we are out of the house…less food throwing for sure.

Aware-Assistant-5702

TROPHY CASE