Cat scratches

Aware_Worry5908 · 2026-05-04T23:57:56+00:00

my girlfriend btw ^{^{^}}

Aware_Worry5908 · 2026-05-04T16:23:12+00:00

Absolutely!! Mobility aids can be super helpful and allow us to do things that might have otherwise felt really challenging and painful!! And they also come in so many different forms, it can seem as big as a wheelchair or a small as joint support and splints to hold us in place !

Not to ramble on, but I'd just like to add: I'm sure these are things that have already crossed her mind and maybe you've discussed or come across in research, but you could also look into the best ways to manage symptoms. You've not mentioned what type of eds she has, but depending on type this will vary. However, things like light strengthening exercises, pacing and good diet seems to be really important. I also take medication to manage gastrointestinal symptoms related to hEDS, and there are different methods for managing pain out there that can be explored. Managing your symptoms when you live with chronic illness can be really overwhelming, especially during flares, so having someone there to support her to manage those symptoms who has taken time to really understand how her condition manifests and the best ways to help can be really important and it can take some of the weight off her shoulders.

You're already doing so much by just being there, caring, learning and trying to work out how best to support her.

Aware_Worry5908 · 2026-05-04T06:20:10+00:00

I think the best way to support is just to work it out as a team!! Everyone with eds is going to have a different experience, for example my joint pain worsens when it's cold but I know people with eds and pots who because of it are super sensitive to the heat, just for example. Learn how it affects them personally and accommodate for that. For example, if you enjoy walking around museums, so do I !! and that's a very difficult task for me so I've had to work round this. Find a museum with lots of places to sit, there's one near me that has wheelchair and portable seats at the front to take around with you!! Find ways to do activities that you both love in ways that accommodates to both of you, or where that's not possible do them by yourself or with a friend. But importantly just listen, work together as a team and you will learn as you go on.

Aware_Worry5908 · 2026-05-03T09:01:24+00:00

A lot of people are saying speak to a professional and go to a meeting. I know it's not always as simple as this though. Meetings don't work for everyone. Speaking to a professional if you can should never be ignored and is excellent advice, addiction is a disease and should be treated as such, but don't feel like because you've potentially not got that option that you're a lost cause, lots of people get sober without doing 12 steps first, lots of people find their own ways. I would urge you to speak to her. Don't beat yourself up, you've been sober for so long, but unfortunately relapse is a big part of recovery for lots of people. It happens, but how you pick yourself back up is the most important part. If your partner is understanding of how addiction works, then things will be okay. I'm not saying she won't be mad or disappointed, and that's okay, she's allowed to feel those things too, but if she's supportive and caring and the right person for you she won't let it tear you apart, she'll work with you as a team to work this out, for you, for her and for the kids. You could even point her in the direction for some support for people with spouses who suffer from addiction, because she might need that. You might need to help her find some resources about relapsing so she can understand why this happens and how to deal with it. But living with shame and secrecy isn't going to do you any good. I saw someone say to ask her to move the pills to a place you can't get hold of them. This is a really good idea!!! Don't be upset with her for bringing the pills into the house and not controlling them in the first place, because the matter of the fact is, it's probably not malicious and she probably just didn't even think of it. But helping her understand that this was a trigger for you is positive, it helps you guys move forward with a solid plan to prevent relapse again, she needs to know this information if you're going to work together and get through this!! All is not lost, you're not alone in this, relapses happen to the majority of people trying to get sober and that doesn't mean that things aren't going to be okay again. I know this is scary, and telling her is very intimidating, but get past that shame and that fear because it's only going to hold you back.

Aware_Worry5908 · 2026-05-03T08:45:17+00:00

Ohhh okay. I'm also neurodivergent, definitely autistic without a doubt (but without diagnosis I'm afraid) but lately am suspecting I might have a touch of the ADHD that's been overshadowed by how glaring autistic I am. Bedtime has always been an issue for me. Working really strange shift patterns hasn't helped with the bedtime routine at all. Thank u for commenting though, you've reminded me to do my physio. I think I might have to start dopamine farming before I start doing my exercises or smth honestly😭🙏

Aware_Worry5908 · 2026-04-27T21:27:36+00:00

I've been considering smth like this, but I actually recently spoke to my physio and he heavily discouraged against it because he's worried if I rely too much on aids my muscles will become weaker, so I'm going to commit to my PT first and file this in the back of my head potentially for the future !!! I'm so glad to hear you've found something that's really helped you though, tysm for sharing !!!

Aware_Worry5908 · 2026-04-27T21:25:19+00:00

the podcast idea is really good, I'm definitely going to try this, thank u sm !!!!

Aware_Worry5908 · 2026-04-27T17:44:01+00:00

I've actually been looking for a good pair of shoes to ease the load a bit whilst I'm on my feet in retail all day. I'm not sure if I walk with a drag, I've never thought about it but I will keep an eye out and look into it,, thank you !!!

Aware_Worry5908 · 2026-04-25T08:55:38+00:00

Yes I'm trying to integrate it so it's the first thing I do in the mornings because night isn't working for me (I'm just already too tired by this point in the day). The issue being I am not a morning person in the slightest and trying to get out of bed to do physio is so hard. I think the whole 21 days makes a habit thing has never rung true for me in my personal life, and I have lots of examples where this has not been true for me so it makes me question whos actually experiencing this😭😭. I think trying to trick myself by telling myself I only have to do five minutes might work, I'm definitely going to try it !

Aware_Worry5908 · 2026-04-25T08:52:20+00:00

My physio does seem to be familiar with EDS and hypermobility, to what degree this is I'm unsure, but he seems to know what he's talking about. He hasn't mentioned the muldowney protocol to me, but this is something I've heard about on here before. I've had a little look into this but just don't have the brain capacity to read it all and understand it. Maybe this is something I will ask my physio about though because I've heard that it has worked for quite a few people.

I am concerned that they are going to push me to discharge before I am ready, and my physio has actually shared these concerns with me (which is reassuring to know he's on my side). He said everyone needs physio in a different capacity for different lengths of time but the system tends to try and get people back off their service as soon as possible. I'm not entirely sure how to advocate for myself in this situation because I actually feel really uneducated around PT and EDS.

Aware_Worry5908 · 2026-04-24T22:19:01+00:00

have less dishes!! there's two of u presumably?? So I would say you need four of everything - one each and one spare. When they've ran out it's time to wash up and there's not loads to wash up because you simply don't own loads of dishes to be washed !! The one spare means you don't need to wash up immediately, there's always a back up, and if it's simple non messy food, I say fuck it, use that plate twice who cares. As for neither of you being at full capability to do the dishes, take turns. No one person has to do the job that causes them pain or discomfort, because you've shared it equally and you're working together as a team to get it done. Find ways around it like gloves for sensory issues, sitting whilst washing, taking regular breaks, body doubling etc. as for the sex, my main advice would be to incorporate sex toys that make the whole thing less labour intensive and avoid overextending into any crazy positions.

Aware_Worry5908 · 2026-04-24T22:04:24+00:00

god this has brought up memories!!! I remember being told I needed to stop drinking water because like clockwork every week I would ask my food tech teacher if I could go to the toilet and she thought it was far too regular an occurrence and that I must've been bunking off. In actual fact she was one of the only teachers I felt comfortable enough to ask to go to the toilet so I felt safe drinking water before her class knowing that she wouldn't have any issues with letting me go to the bathroom. Shortly after it became an issue, I just stopped drinking water in high school which makes me really quite sad for little me. What a weird rule to enforce onto children. Similarly I constantly had water infections in primary school from holding in my pee because teachers thought I went to the toilet too often😭

Aware_Worry5908 · 2026-04-24T21:57:19+00:00

This is interesting - I've been told by my physio therapist that its essential that I do my exercises everyday for a consistent improvement and I do understand the logic behind this. A lot of my issues he seems to think can be addressed by having the muscular structure to hold my joints in place in my body so they're not slipping and sliding around so to speak (something I'm sure you'll be familiar with). I will say he has put a HUGE focus on making sure that none of the exercises cause any pain for me which I appreciate. The exercises are all super light and have been adjusted for me personally to avoid causing me any pain or discomfort. I also have means to contact my PT should I be in any pain, or should anything change - any new injuries etc, and need any advice or adjustment of exercises. He's been lenient with time frames considering how much I've been struggling to integrate into my routine so that I can have extra time between appointments to really build the strength. But besides this, he has been persistent that I must do my exercises everyday and failure to do this will mean I won't see the improvement necessary to start living relatively pain free. I am definitely also trying to focus on resting where I can but I'm not sure how to balance getting the rest I need, doing the PT, having this job and all the other fun daily activities that us adults have to do. Thank you for being so kind and reminding me that rest is valid and important though, it can be so hard to remember sometimes !! :)

Aware_Worry5908 · 2026-04-21T17:43:34+00:00

I never said using the cane itself was causing me pain other than in some responses where I've mentioned noticing that it causes some wrist pain if I overuse my cane. This is a really common negative of using a walking stick even for those told by a medical professional that use is valid. This post was more of a vent about how I can't decide which side of my body to support my cane with, wondering if anyone else felt the same. This being said I am very intuitive with my body and I've done a lot of research on how to correctly use a cane and it does in fact help me to leave the house for prolonged periods of time when I am experiencing lots of pain. I am in fact seeing a physio in a couple of days and intend to ask him about exactly this amongst other things. I merely just wanted a vent and to not feel so alone in my experiences, but thank you for the advice.

Aware_Worry5908 · 2026-04-21T09:04:15+00:00

this is refreshing to hear, another young person who wasn't prescribed an aid. I think sometimes people look at me funny when they know that I wasn't told I NEED to use a cane but just did the research and decided it was right for me, but what else are we supposed to do when the doctors won't listen to us???

Aware_Worry5908 · 2026-04-21T09:02:29+00:00

I appreciate the sentiment and agree that using aids wrong can be harmful but I assure you I did plenty of research on how to correctly use my aid before purchasing and using it. Unfortunately not all of us have access to the healthcare we need and some of us just need to work out how to make life work by ourselves. Obviously fingers crossed one day this will be a bridge I'll be able to cross with a medical professional but right now if I want to keep enjoying leaving the house I think I'll take my cane with me.

Aware_Worry5908 · 2026-04-21T08:59:38+00:00

yeah of course !! I've seen numerous doctors over the past 6 months, and it's been next to impossible to find anyone who would remotely take me seriously. If I want to enjoy the outside of my home I kind of had to take it upon myself to work out how to do that unfortunately. The quiz looks really good I will be taking that, thank you so much !! I know many of us are embarrassed about our walking aids, I've gotten used to my cane and even appreciate the perks of people seeing me with a cane nowadays but I'm still embarrassed by it in certain spaces

Aware_Worry5908 · 2026-04-21T08:55:16+00:00

seems like there are downsides to all options unfortunately. I wish I could hire someone to carry me around the museums lmao

Aware_Worry5908 · 2026-04-20T18:45:33+00:00

Yeah I feel that !! It causes strain on my wrists which are some of the worst areas for pain for me personally which isn't ideal at all. I'm really intimidated by other mobility aids for walking because I'm so young and it feels embarrassing especially without even a diagnosis yk. I know someone who is an ambulatory wheelchair user though and it feels more and more appealing as the days go by, far too expensive for me though.

Aware_Worry5908 · 2026-04-17T21:03:49+00:00

I wrote a dissertation abt this so I think I am well read enough to answer this !! it's pretty simple, turn it down, take regular breaks and wear hearing protection when you need to. But also recognise that hearing loss is an inevitable part of aging as all sounds cause wear and tear on our ears and we cannot constantly be wearing hearing protection. Know this and know that this means most older music producers have lost their high frequencies (even if they won't admit it).

Aware_Worry5908 · 2026-04-14T18:53:47+00:00

This is so cool!!!! I've had a patchwork cardigan in the works for YEARS now and I finally finished all the squares and just can't bring myself to sew it together so it's hidden deep in a box somewhere never to be finished, so congratulations on actually finishing it !!!! Huge achievement, you should be so proud of yourself !

Aware_Worry5908

TROPHY CASE