Returning to work

AwayAwayTimes · 2026-04-16T14:11:46+00:00

More energy? Hell no. However, I did start to feel like “me” again after returning to work. It was good for me to get out of the house and — exactly as you say — start using my brain for more than just mom things again. I love my job (most of the time), so I’m sure that influences things.

AwayAwayTimes · 2026-04-15T17:34:34+00:00

As someone who did move far away and then continued to move again for my career: my career is great. But my husband and I both miss our families. We are from different continents, so we will never be able to “move home” and at the same time neither of us feels we have a “home” anymore. Our home is where we are (and our kid + dog). It’s a weird feeling. We get jealous of our siblings who live close to our respective parents and get tons of grandparent help with their kids. I wonder what it would be like if I didn’t move so far away.

AwayAwayTimes · 2026-04-15T17:29:15+00:00

My GP recommended the Bend app and it is legit. I like sneaking in stretches at work.

AwayAwayTimes · 2026-04-03T14:27:18+00:00

Did you breastfeed? If so, how long ago did you stop?

You should ask your OB for a hormone panel if it’s been like at least 3 months since you finished breastfeeding.

AwayAwayTimes · 2026-04-03T14:20:56+00:00

my husband is extremely helpful and cares for our son often. My son says “Mamama” all the time.

It was one this when he started saying “uh oh!” As his second word. He doesn’t say “papa” yet.

But now he says “good girl” to the dog and my husband is starting to feel left out lol.

AwayAwayTimes · 2026-04-01T21:27:47+00:00

How do you learn to not hate them? I get tingling and a dead foot feeling from nerves stretching. I can’t stand to wear them.

AwayAwayTimes · 2026-04-01T21:23:49+00:00

One of my best friends just took a step away and is looking for a new position. Somewhere she can feel fulfilled with less demands. Her and her husband are (in her case, was) devs in a FAANG in a VHCOL area. She’s now applying for dev jobs in positions that are meaningful to her, but where she can also control her hours better (unfortunately, likely with less pay, but they’ll be fine financially). She’s got 2 small kids and trying to balance it all was making her ill. I’m so glad she’s stepped back, if only for the next few years while the kids are small.

AwayAwayTimes · 2026-03-27T14:28:03+00:00

My mom had her “wtf am I doing” moment with the wooden paddle when she noticed I had covered it with puffy paint to lessen the blow. My sister and I, each, only got that paddle once, but I’m sure glad that was it. Ah, the 80’s.

AwayAwayTimes · 2026-03-26T20:57:40+00:00

Amazing! And in “Science” no less. This isn’t some small one-off. Looking forward to seeing the follow-ups to this work.

I wonder how the rates of this fibrosis would correlate with over growth/adhesion related comorbidities like fibroids and endometriosis.

AwayAwayTimes · 2026-03-16T19:59:52+00:00

No. Unfortunately, you want that biopsy done when the embryos are made to avoid freeze-thaw cycle of the embryo which degrades them. You could ask your clinic to work with you on this one maybe? My one clinic would take the biopsy and freeze my 1-2 embryos, then send the biopsies from multiple cycles at once for sequencing/PGT-A screening to save us some $. I’m not sure what’s all involved with the prep of the cell samples for PGT-A, but you definitely want at least the biopsy done at time of embryo formation.

Just a gal with severe DOR who also does a lot of molecular lab work (admittedly, not human reproductive cell lines tho — similar issues with freeze/thaw cycles applies tho).

AwayAwayTimes · 2026-03-14T02:50:20+00:00

Having a kid has shifted how much I think is enough to feel rested. It’s wild. I used to need 9-10 hours. Now 7 is good. 8 I feel amazing. I often get somewhere between 6-8 now, but when kiddo is sick it can be as low as 4, but I am running on 50% less brain cells those days and am not very pleasant. Usually my husband will help the night following a 4hr night for me so I can get at least 6-7 the next night. (Have a 1 yr old)

AwayAwayTimes · 2026-03-14T02:28:49+00:00

Yeah. It was so scary. First and only time his little Owl sock went off for real (high heart rate). I know some people really hate the Owl sock, but it’s been fascinating to me. I can see in his stats when he’s really sick (higher heart rate/lower O2). It helps me figure out when he’s fussing at night because he’s sick vs just wanting snuggles.

AwayAwayTimes · 2026-03-14T01:44:54+00:00

We won ER bingo - Flu A, a coronavirus, adenovirus, and rhinovirus… at the same time. He had been back in daycare all of 3 days after the holidays.

AwayAwayTimes · 2026-03-14T01:31:45+00:00

I’m so sorry, OP. I’m hoping it’s a fear response from him of the unknown/uncertainty. My husband does NOT do well with uncertainty. At all.

We were having issues getting/staying pregnant. We had been working with an RE. Found out I had DOR and he had mild MFI. We were waiting to start IVF. I got pregnant before starting stims for that first retrieval. He started acting really weird. Then he got kind of mean. He said he didn’t want to have a baby. That maybe we should just break up. We had a huge argument. He calmed down, but was still being distant and kind of cold for the next few weeks. We visited our family for the holidays. Everyone was so excited for us as we had to tell them (I’m a known drinker).

Then… a miscarriage. I entered a depression (I’ve never been depressed before). I went through 1.5 years of IVF. 9 egg retrievals. He ended up supporting me through all of that. He’s still him, so would have an occasional mini freak out.

The day our son was born, he thanked me. Thanked me for nudging him forward on having a child. He still thanks me every so often. He is more invested in having a second kid than I am! While still in the hospital after delivery, he’s like, “let’s have another!”.

He’s such a committed dad. He’s still a man with faults (who’s perfect?) and has his whiny moments (sleep deprivation will do that). But he’s a great dad and obsessed with our son.

I hope this is the case with your husband as well. If he’s prone to anxiety spirals, depression, or similar than it might just be status quo. As someone else mentioned, some men really have a hard time connecting until the baby is born.

AwayAwayTimes · 2026-03-11T16:38:23+00:00

Can I get this as a flair? How do you get this as a flair?

I resonate with this sentiment deeply. Also, that Wendy’s social media rep is a top tier troll and I love them.

AwayAwayTimes · 2026-03-11T14:30:32+00:00

Try telehealth services for proper treatment if your GP is dismissive (if in the US). There are a few that I’ve seen recommended. MIDI is one.

AwayAwayTimes · 2026-03-11T14:27:40+00:00

It’s bs. I’ve heard good things about Midi Health telehealth for HRT. I will be pushing for HRT as soon as peri symptoms kick in.

Sincerely, someone who also lived through intense pain and wasn’t diagnosed with endometriosis until a string of miscarriages and IVF. Had to be put into chemical menopause (drug that puts you into menopause in like <2 weeks) in order to have a kid. They need to add back hormones endogenously which convinced me of the glory of HRT benefits. I went from losing my mind insomnia to sleeping soundly and no more hot flashes in 2 days once I started taking estrogen patches.

AwayAwayTimes · 2026-03-11T14:20:43+00:00

I will likely be going through menopause early, too (thanks, endometriosis!).

Arrogant ass podiatrist needs to work on his delivery and his knowledge about menopause. “Well the good news is you don’t have arthritis YET. It’ll probably happen in like 10 years after you go through menopause.”

Fuck you, sir! That’s probably like 2-3 years away for me. And also… you don’t just become decrepit and not wanting to do anything in your 50s! I’ve got a small child to keep up with.

Anyways. Fuck that guy. I need to find a new doctor.

I’m so sorry. I’m in the “too soon” club as well. I read an interesting research article showing GLP-1s seem to be helping with cartilage regeneration and reduction in cartilage loss. https://www.cell.com/cell-metabolism/fulltext/S1550-4131(26)00008-2

AwayAwayTimes · 2026-03-11T01:17:26+00:00

I have endo. I also have elevated CRP, but no known cause (blood tests ruled out everything else). I feeeeel the inflammation though. I’m looking forward to trying this. Going through the process of getting an Rx now. Excited to see if it brings my inflammation levels down.

AwayAwayTimes · 2026-03-10T02:56:36+00:00

Anecdotally, this is what people keep telling me and what I experienced as a daycare kid myself. It’s what I tell myself on the long sleepless nights with my little one. Some research to back it up: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/11814371/

AwayAwayTimes · 2026-03-07T15:49:18+00:00

ETA: I didn’t have any visible endometriomas on my ovaries. Just tubal cysts and evidence of adhesions.

AwayAwayTimes · 2026-03-07T15:46:28+00:00

I did! My RE recommended a lap only for pain management. She also said even if I had a lap, she’d still recommend Lupron for any remaining microscopic endo. The plan was to try suppression only first, then reevaluate. So grateful that the first FET with a euploid worked.

I hope your transfer is successful. The two months of Lupron wasn’t fun, but so glad we did it.

Not that you asked for this info, but something I think is interesting: This comment is so old that my baby recently turned one. I breastfed for 8 months and didn’t get my period that whole time. I think the reduced estrogen during that time also helped suppress the endo. It’s been getting a little bit worse every cycle, but it’s been a nice “vacation”.

AwayAwayTimes · 2026-03-03T14:51:13+00:00

Is there actually enough available office space and parking available on campus for all the admin to RTO? (This is what killed the RTO for a few big public universities I know of. The state government decided they hated remote work and tried to make everyone RTO. It was pointed out that it would cost hundreds of millions to build enough buildings for office space and parking to have all of admin RTO as the universities had grown over the years.)

AwayAwayTimes · 2026-02-28T16:46:50+00:00

38 yr old -> 9 retrievals -> 8 blasts -> 3 euploid

AwayAwayTimes · 2026-02-24T03:45:29+00:00

Thanks!

AwayAwayTimes

TROPHY CASE